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Spurious correlation #2,229 · View random

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is GMO use in cotton and the second variable is Arson in New Hampshire.  The chart goes from 2000 to 2022, and the two variables track closely in value over that time. Small Image
Download png
, svg

AI explanation

As the demand for non-GMO cotton increased, farmers in the southern United States had to find alternative crops to cultivate. This led to a boom in the production of non-GMO peanuts. Now, you might be wondering, what do non-GMO peanuts have to do with arson in New Hampshire? Well, it's quite simple. As peanut crops flourished, so did the population of adorable, yet mischievous, peanut-loving squirrels. These crafty critters were so busy feasting on the non-GMO peanuts that they simply didn't have the time or inclination to engage in their usual fiery shenanigans up in New Hampshire. And that's how a shift in cotton farming practices ended up putting a damper on the arson epidemic.

Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Create an image of a cotton plant with bright white flowers swaying in the breeze within a field in New Hampshire. Behind the cotton plant, depict a raging fire that engulfs the edges of the field, creating billowing clouds of smoke. The setting should showcase the stark contrast between the peaceful plant and the destructive force of the fire in a minimalist brutalist style. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.
This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: Celtic art Cubism Cute 2D animation Cyberpunk Brutalism
ChatGPT: Brutalism

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire together. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: In a field in New Hampshire, a cotton plant with bright white flowers sways in the breeze. Behind it, fire rages, creating billowing clouds of smoke as flames engulf the edges of the field.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ Brutalism ] and depicting this scene: In a field in New Hampshire, a cotton plant with bright white flowers sways in the breeze. Behind it, fire rages, creating billowing clouds of smoke as flames engulf the edges of the field. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Create an image of a cotton plant with bright white flowers swaying in the breeze within a field in New Hampshire. Behind the cotton plant, depict a raging fire that engulfs the edges of the field, creating billowing clouds of smoke. The setting should showcase the stark contrast between the peaceful plant and the destructive force of the fire in a minimalist brutalist style.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how a decrease in GMO use in cotton caused Arson in New Hampshire to decrease. Make it feel plausible.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.01)
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

Journal of Agricultural Arson Studies

Jan 2024

Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real!
Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.




Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a silly researcher writing an academic paper.You write titles and abstracts of goofy academic research papers.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, and add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please draft the title and abstract of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Include a pun in the title.

Your research team used data from USDA and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services to assess this nagging question. You found a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 for 2000 to 2022.

Please respond in this format (replace "Lorem ipsum dolor sit" with your title and abstract)

[[TITLE]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit

[[ABSTRACT]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit



ChatGPT:
[[TITLE]]
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a silly researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the introduction section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the introduction section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[INTRODUCTION]]



ChatGPT:
INTRODUCTION

As we delve into the world of agriculture and crime, we must acknowledge the unexpected and sometimes downright bizarre connections that can emerge. Our research aims to shed light on the intriguing relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the occurrence of arson in the charming state of New Hampshire. While one might initially think these two subjects have as much in common as a cow and a canoe, our findings have led us to ponder the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and its potential impact on criminal behavior.

In recent years, the adoption of GMO cotton has sparked debates surrounding its impact on the environment, human health, and now, seemingly, on fire-related incidents. To unravel this mystery, our research team meticulously analyzed USDA and FBI data spanning from 2000 to 2022, unearthing a surprisingly strong correlation between the two seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and the statistical significance (p < 0.01) have left even the most skeptical researchers scratching their heads and reaching for the fire extinguisher.

The charm of New Hampshire is undeniably magnetic, drawing in tourists with its picturesque landscapes and quaint towns. However, beneath its tranquil exterior lies a puzzling spike in arson incidents that demands investigation. Could it be that the very cotton fields that contribute to the state's agricultural economy are also fueling a fiery streak of criminal mischief? This paper seeks to untangle this conundrum and explore the implications it has for both the agricultural and law enforcement communities.

Join us on this quirky yet enlightening journey through the intertwining fields of agroscience and law enforcement, as we unravel the unexpected ties between GMO cotton and arson in the Granite State. We aim to not only provide valuable insights but also to offer a lighthearted take on the enigmatic ways in which our world can surprise us.

Alright, that should get the readers intrigued while still making them chuckle.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a silly researcher writing an academic paper.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then devolve ever further, and mention something completely ridiculous, like you conducted literature review by reading the backs of shampoo bottles.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
INTRODUCTION
As we delve into the world of agriculture and crime, we must acknowledge the unexpected and sometimes downright bizarre connections that can emerge. Our research aims to shed light on the intriguing relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the occurrence of arson in the charming state of New Hampshire. While one might initially think these two subjects have as much in common as a cow and a canoe, our findings have led us to ponder the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and its potential impact on criminal behavior.
In recent years, the adoption of GMO cotton has sparked debates surrounding its impact on the environment, human health, and now, seemingly, on fire-related incidents. To unravel this mystery, our research team meticulously analyzed USDA and FBI data spanning from 2000 to 2022, unearthing a surprisingly strong correlation between the two seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and the statistical significance (p < 0.01) have left even the most skeptical researchers scratching their heads and reaching for the fire extinguisher.
The charm of New Hampshire is undeniably magnetic, drawing in tourists with its picturesque landscapes and quaint towns. However, beneath its tranquil exterior lies a puzzling spike in arson incidents that demands investigation. Could it be that the very cotton fields that contribute to the state's agricultural economy are also fueling a fiery streak of criminal mischief? This paper seeks to untangle this conundrum and explore the implications it has for both the agricultural and law enforcement communities.
Join us on this quirky yet enlightening journey through the intertwining fields of agroscience and law enforcement, as we unravel the unexpected ties between GMO cotton and arson in the Granite State. We aim to not only provide valuable insights but also to offer a lighthearted take on the enigmatic ways in which our world can surprise us.
Alright, that should get the readers intrigued while still making them chuckle.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]



ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

In “Genetically Modified Organisms in Agriculture: Economics and Politics” by Smith, the authors find a comprehensive assessment of the economic and political implications of GMO crop cultivation. However, what they failed to anticipate was the potential fiery fallout in the form of arson incidents, especially in the context of cotton fields in New Hampshire. As we venture into this uncharted territory of GMO cotton and arson, we must also consider the work of Doe in “The Environmental Impact of Genetically Modified Crops,” which provides a detailed analysis of the environmental effects of GMOs. Surprisingly, the book did not touch upon the combustible consequences of such crops in relation to criminal activities, leaving our research team to uncover this flammable link.

Turning attention to non-fiction sources, “Arson in Agriculture: A Case Study of New England” by Jones sheds light on the historical prevalence and factors driving arson in rural areas. While the book primarily focuses on traditional agricultural practices, it provides a foundation for understanding arson within the agricultural context. Now, moving into the fictional realm, the classic mystery novel “Cotton Fields and Fiery Mysteries” by Jane Doe seems to have foretold our unexpected intersection of GMO cotton and arson, albeit in a more imaginative setting. The captivating tale, set in New Hampshire, unravels the enigmatic connection between cotton and arson, offering an intriguing parallel to our research findings.

In a departure from traditional literature sources, our research team also delved into unconventional reading materials to uncover the peculiar link between GMO cotton and arson. Surprisingly, the backs of shampoo bottles yielded no concrete evidence on this subject, much to our dismay. However, the quirky anecdotes and pun-laden descriptions provided some light-hearted relief amidst our intense research endeavors. While the shampoo bottles certainly sparked our curiosity, they failed to fan the flames of knowledge on this particular topic.

As we navigate through the diverse landscape of literature, both academic and otherwise, we acknowledge the unexpected twists and turns that have enriched our understanding of the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation in New Hampshire.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a silly researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from USDA and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services . You used data from 2000 to 2022

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.

[[INTRODUCTION]]
INTRODUCTION
As we delve into the world of agriculture and crime, we must acknowledge the unexpected and sometimes downright bizarre connections that can emerge. Our research aims to shed light on the intriguing relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the occurrence of arson in the charming state of New Hampshire. While one might initially think these two subjects have as much in common as a cow and a canoe, our findings have led us to ponder the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and its potential impact on criminal behavior.
In recent years, the adoption of GMO cotton has sparked debates surrounding its impact on the environment, human health, and now, seemingly, on fire-related incidents. To unravel this mystery, our research team meticulously analyzed USDA and FBI data spanning from 2000 to 2022, unearthing a surprisingly strong correlation between the two seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and the statistical significance (p < 0.01) have left even the most skeptical researchers scratching their heads and reaching for the fire extinguisher.
The charm of New Hampshire is undeniably magnetic, drawing in tourists with its picturesque landscapes and quaint towns. However, beneath its tranquil exterior lies a puzzling spike in arson incidents that demands investigation. Could it be that the very cotton fields that contribute to the state's agricultural economy are also fueling a fiery streak of criminal mischief? This paper seeks to untangle this conundrum and explore the implications it has for both the agricultural and law enforcement communities.
Join us on this quirky yet enlightening journey through the intertwining fields of agroscience and law enforcement, as we unravel the unexpected ties between GMO cotton and arson in the Granite State. We aim to not only provide valuable insights but also to offer a lighthearted take on the enigmatic ways in which our world can surprise us.
Alright, that should get the readers intrigued while still making them chuckle.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]



ChatGPT:

Alright, time to get serious, well, as serious as we can be considering our whimsical subject matter. Let's dive into the methodology of how we uncovered the mysterious, fiery connection between GMO cotton and arson incidents in the enchanting state of New Hampshire.

Data Collection:
Our research team scoured the vast expanse of the internet to gather relevant data for this study. We primarily relied on information from the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services. While we did consider consulting local witches, we ultimately concluded that data from these reputable sources would provide a more reliable foundation for our analysis.

Timeframe:
To capture a comprehensive snapshot of the relationship between GMO cotton use and arson, we used data spanning from 2000 to 2022. This timeframe allowed us to encompass both the preponderance of GMO cotton adoption and the evolution of fire-related incidents in New Hampshire, giving us ample material to fuel our investigation.

Analysis:
Our study involved cross-referencing the adoption of GMO cotton in agricultural practices in New Hampshire with the reported incidents of arson in the state. We employed statistical methods for data analysis, such as regression analysis and correlation testing, to uncover any potential relationships. However, rather than conventional statistical analyses, we considered using a crystal ball or a deck of tarot cards for added flair. Ultimately, we stuck with the tried and tested methods to ensure the rigor of our findings.

Correlation Assessment:
The strength and significance of the correlation between GMO cotton use and arson incidents were integral to our investigation. We calculated the correlation coefficient and applied statistical tests to determine the level of significance. Though we briefly entertained the idea of employing a magic eight-ball for determining correlations, we decided to rely on established statistical measures to maintain the integrity of our study.

Ethical Considerations:
In conducting this research, we were acutely aware of the need to uphold ethical standards, even in the face of whimsical subject matter. We maintained respect for the privacy of individuals involved in arson incidents and ensured that our analysis adhered to ethical guidelines.

Limitations and Biases:
It's important to acknowledge the limitations of our study and the potential biases that may have influenced our findings. While we maintained a commitment to objectivity, the nature of our subject matter inevitably introduced an element of levity into our approach. Nonetheless, we endeavored to balance our lighthearted perspective with rigorous research methodologies.

In summary, our methodology combined a rigorous approach to data collection and analysis with a touch of whimsy, aligning with the unconventional nature of our investigation into the unexpected intersection of GMO cotton and arson incidents in New Hampshire. We hope our readers are ready to join us on this outlandish yet enlightening academic adventure.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a silly researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from USDA and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services .

For the time period 2000 to 2022, you found a correlation 0.9257785, r-squared of 0.8570659, and p < 0.01.

One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.

-------

And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
INTRODUCTION
As we delve into the world of agriculture and crime, we must acknowledge the unexpected and sometimes downright bizarre connections that can emerge. Our research aims to shed light on the intriguing relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the occurrence of arson in the charming state of New Hampshire. While one might initially think these two subjects have as much in common as a cow and a canoe, our findings have led us to ponder the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and its potential impact on criminal behavior.
In recent years, the adoption of GMO cotton has sparked debates surrounding its impact on the environment, human health, and now, seemingly, on fire-related incidents. To unravel this mystery, our research team meticulously analyzed USDA and FBI data spanning from 2000 to 2022, unearthing a surprisingly strong correlation between the two seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and the statistical significance (p < 0.01) have left even the most skeptical researchers scratching their heads and reaching for the fire extinguisher.
The charm of New Hampshire is undeniably magnetic, drawing in tourists with its picturesque landscapes and quaint towns. However, beneath its tranquil exterior lies a puzzling spike in arson incidents that demands investigation. Could it be that the very cotton fields that contribute to the state's agricultural economy are also fueling a fiery streak of criminal mischief? This paper seeks to untangle this conundrum and explore the implications it has for both the agricultural and law enforcement communities.
Join us on this quirky yet enlightening journey through the intertwining fields of agroscience and law enforcement, as we unravel the unexpected ties between GMO cotton and arson in the Granite State. We aim to not only provide valuable insights but also to offer a lighthearted take on the enigmatic ways in which our world can surprise us.
Alright, that should get the readers intrigued while still making them chuckle.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[RESULTS]]



ChatGPT:

RESULTS

The analysis of the USDA and FBI data from 2000 to 2022 revealed a remarkably strong correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the incidence of arson in the state of New Hampshire. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and an r-squared value of 0.8570659 suggested a robust linear relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and fire-related criminal activities, with a level of statistical significance denoted by p < 0.01.

Our findings are graphically represented in Figure 1, a scatterplot showcasing the undeniable correlation between GMO cotton use and arson incidents in New Hampshire. While the figure is devoid of catchy puns or fiery artwork, it effectively encapsulates the strength of the relationship between these seemingly unrelated variables.

This discovery of a significant association between GMO cotton and arson raises intriguing questions, leaving both the agricultural and law enforcement communities pondering the unexpected nexus between agricultural innovation and criminal behavior. The implications of this link are as thought-provoking as they are unexpected, adding a touch of mystery to the realm of agricultural and criminal research. As researchers, it is humbling to realize that beneath the seemingly tranquil fields of GMO cotton, a fiery streak of criminal mischief may be smoldering, or should we say, "ginn-igniting."

While our results spark further questions and speculation, they stand as a testament to the quirky intersections within our world, and to the unexpected ways in which seemingly unrelated domains can intertwine. We conclude this section with a somewhat sizzling curiosity: what other surprising connections might lurk beneath the fabric of our seemingly unrelated domains, waiting to be unraveled? With this thought, we encourage readers to approach their research endeavors with an open mind and perhaps a fire extinguisher, just in case.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a silly researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
In “Genetically Modified Organisms in Agriculture: Economics and Politics” by Smith, the authors find a comprehensive assessment of the economic and political implications of GMO crop cultivation. However, what they failed to anticipate was the potential fiery fallout in the form of arson incidents, especially in the context of cotton fields in New Hampshire. As we venture into this uncharted territory of GMO cotton and arson, we must also consider the work of Doe in “The Environmental Impact of Genetically Modified Crops,” which provides a detailed analysis of the environmental effects of GMOs. Surprisingly, the book did not touch upon the combustible consequences of such crops in relation to criminal activities, leaving our research team to uncover this flammable link.
Turning attention to non-fiction sources, “Arson in Agriculture: A Case Study of New England” by Jones sheds light on the historical prevalence and factors driving arson in rural areas. While the book primarily focuses on traditional agricultural practices, it provides a foundation for understanding arson within the agricultural context. Now, moving into the fictional realm, the classic mystery novel “Cotton Fields and Fiery Mysteries” by Jane Doe seems to have foretold our unexpected intersection of GMO cotton and arson, albeit in a more imaginative setting. The captivating tale, set in New Hampshire, unravels the enigmatic connection between cotton and arson, offering an intriguing parallel to our research findings.
In a departure from traditional literature sources, our research team also delved into unconventional reading materials to uncover the peculiar link between GMO cotton and arson. Surprisingly, the backs of shampoo bottles yielded no concrete evidence on this subject, much to our dismay. However, the quirky anecdotes and pun-laden descriptions provided some light-hearted relief amidst our intense research endeavors. While the shampoo bottles certainly sparked our curiosity, they failed to fan the flames of knowledge on this particular topic.
As we navigate through the diverse landscape of literature, both academic and otherwise, we acknowledge the unexpected twists and turns that have enriched our understanding of the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation in New Hampshire.

[[RESULTS]]
RESULTS
The analysis of the USDA and FBI data from 2000 to 2022 revealed a remarkably strong correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the incidence of arson in the state of New Hampshire. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and an r-squared value of 0.8570659 suggested a robust linear relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and fire-related criminal activities, with a level of statistical significance denoted by p < 0.01.
Our findings are graphically represented in Figure 1, a scatterplot showcasing the undeniable correlation between GMO cotton use and arson incidents in New Hampshire. While the figure is devoid of catchy puns or fiery artwork, it effectively encapsulates the strength of the relationship between these seemingly unrelated variables.
This discovery of a significant association between GMO cotton and arson raises intriguing questions, leaving both the agricultural and law enforcement communities pondering the unexpected nexus between agricultural innovation and criminal behavior. The implications of this link are as thought-provoking as they are unexpected, adding a touch of mystery to the realm of agricultural and criminal research. As researchers, it is humbling to realize that beneath the seemingly tranquil fields of GMO cotton, a fiery streak of criminal mischief may be smoldering, or should we say, "ginn-igniting."
While our results spark further questions and speculation, they stand as a testament to the quirky intersections within our world, and to the unexpected ways in which seemingly unrelated domains can intertwine. We conclude this section with a somewhat sizzling curiosity: what other surprising connections might lurk beneath the fabric of our seemingly unrelated domains, waiting to be unraveled? With this thought, we encourage readers to approach their research endeavors with an open mind and perhaps a fire extinguisher, just in case.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

Our findings support the prior research on the economic and political implications of GMO crop cultivation, as discussed by Smith. The robust correlation between GMO cotton use and arson incidents in New Hampshire highlights the potential fiery fallout of agricultural innovation, underscoring the need to consider the broader societal impacts of GMO adoption. It seems that the "go-go-GMO" mentality may have unintended consequences, igniting discussions on the need for comprehensive risk assessments beyond just crop yield and pest resistance. The unexpected smoldering relationship uncovered in our study adds a new dimension to the literature, turning the heat up on the traditional discussions surrounding GMOs.

Furthermore, our results lend credibility to the fictional musings of Jane Doe in "Cotton Fields and Fiery Mysteries," offering a real-world confirmation of the peculiar link between GMO cotton and arson. It appears that life may indeed imitate art, or perhaps it's the other way around. In any case, our research has shed light on a connection that not even the most imaginative mystery writers could have foreseen.

Drawing from the historical context provided by Jones in "Arson in Agriculture: A Case Study of New England," our findings open the door to a modern-day understanding of arson within the agricultural landscape. The tranquil fields of GMO cotton in New Hampshire may hold a fiery streak of criminal mischief, challenging traditional views of agricultural crime and necessitating a reevaluation of rural criminal behavior patterns. Who would have thought that agricultural innovation could set such a sensational backdrop for criminal activities, turning the once bucolic fields into a potential hotbed of intrigue?

As for our unconventional reading materials, namely the shampoo bottle anecdotes, their lack of incendiary evidence now stands in stark contrast to the fiery revelation of our study. It appears that the real "fire and brimstone" lay not in the whimsical descriptions on shampoo bottles, but rather in the unconventional intersection of GMO cotton and arson in the New Hampshire landscape. This unexpected twist adds a touch of whimsy to our research journey, reaffirming the pivotal role of unpredictability in both academic and real-world investigations.

In conclusion, our research has ignited a new line of inquiry into the implications of GMO adoption in agricultural landscapes. As the flames of knowledge continue to flicker, we invite fellow researchers to explore other surprising connections that may be waiting to be unearthed. After all, the world of research is as full of surprises as it is full of potential puns - or should I say, "pun-dits."


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a silly researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton and Arson in New Hampshire. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.

[[INTRDUCTION]]
INTRODUCTION
As we delve into the world of agriculture and crime, we must acknowledge the unexpected and sometimes downright bizarre connections that can emerge. Our research aims to shed light on the intriguing relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the occurrence of arson in the charming state of New Hampshire. While one might initially think these two subjects have as much in common as a cow and a canoe, our findings have led us to ponder the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and its potential impact on criminal behavior.
In recent years, the adoption of GMO cotton has sparked debates surrounding its impact on the environment, human health, and now, seemingly, on fire-related incidents. To unravel this mystery, our research team meticulously analyzed USDA and FBI data spanning from 2000 to 2022, unearthing a surprisingly strong correlation between the two seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and the statistical significance (p < 0.01) have left even the most skeptical researchers scratching their heads and reaching for the fire extinguisher.
The charm of New Hampshire is undeniably magnetic, drawing in tourists with its picturesque landscapes and quaint towns. However, beneath its tranquil exterior lies a puzzling spike in arson incidents that demands investigation. Could it be that the very cotton fields that contribute to the state's agricultural economy are also fueling a fiery streak of criminal mischief? This paper seeks to untangle this conundrum and explore the implications it has for both the agricultural and law enforcement communities.
Join us on this quirky yet enlightening journey through the intertwining fields of agroscience and law enforcement, as we unravel the unexpected ties between GMO cotton and arson in the Granite State. We aim to not only provide valuable insights but also to offer a lighthearted take on the enigmatic ways in which our world can surprise us.
Alright, that should get the readers intrigued while still making them chuckle.

[[RESULTS]]
RESULTS
The analysis of the USDA and FBI data from 2000 to 2022 revealed a remarkably strong correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and the incidence of arson in the state of New Hampshire. The correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and an r-squared value of 0.8570659 suggested a robust linear relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and fire-related criminal activities, with a level of statistical significance denoted by p < 0.01.
Our findings are graphically represented in Figure 1, a scatterplot showcasing the undeniable correlation between GMO cotton use and arson incidents in New Hampshire. While the figure is devoid of catchy puns or fiery artwork, it effectively encapsulates the strength of the relationship between these seemingly unrelated variables.
This discovery of a significant association between GMO cotton and arson raises intriguing questions, leaving both the agricultural and law enforcement communities pondering the unexpected nexus between agricultural innovation and criminal behavior. The implications of this link are as thought-provoking as they are unexpected, adding a touch of mystery to the realm of agricultural and criminal research. As researchers, it is humbling to realize that beneath the seemingly tranquil fields of GMO cotton, a fiery streak of criminal mischief may be smoldering, or should we say, "ginn-igniting."
While our results spark further questions and speculation, they stand as a testament to the quirky intersections within our world, and to the unexpected ways in which seemingly unrelated domains can intertwine. We conclude this section with a somewhat sizzling curiosity: what other surprising connections might lurk beneath the fabric of our seemingly unrelated domains, waiting to be unraveled? With this thought, we encourage readers to approach their research endeavors with an open mind and perhaps a fire extinguisher, just in case.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]



ChatGPT:

CONCLUSION

In unraveling the curious correlation between GMO cotton and arson in the quaint state of New Hampshire, our findings have certainly set academia ablaze with curiosity. The statistically robust link between agricultural innovation and criminal mischief has ignited a fiery debate about the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns - a conflagration of intellectual excitement, if you will. Our results leave us pondering: what other seemingly unrelated phenomena might be kindling hidden connections, ready to spark new avenues of inquiry? As we douse the fiery questions raised by this research, it is evident that no more research into this area is needed. The blaze has been well and truly extinguished, and it's time to move on to less incendiary topics.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

Journal of Agricultural Arson Studies


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

The Society for Agri-Cultural Quirk Studies


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled The Fiery Side of Innovation: Unraveling the GMO Cotton-Arson Connection in New Hampshire with an abstract of In this playful yet serious academic paper, we delve into the unexpected correlation between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation and arson incidents in the picturesque state of New Hampshire. Utilizing USDA and FBI data, our research team has unearthed a striking relationship between the adoption of GMO cotton and the occurrence of arson, with a correlation coefficient of 0.9257785 and p < 0.01 observed from 2000 to 2022. We discuss the potential implications of this correlation, exploring the fiery side effects of agricultural innovation and the burning questions it raises. This paper serves as a testament to the unexpected intersections of science, crime, and puns in the world of academia.

ChatGPT:

GMO cotton, arson, New Hampshire, genetically modified organisms, USDA data, FBI data, cotton cultivation, correlation, agricultural innovation, fiery side effects, crime, science intersections, academic research

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.



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Data details

GMO use in cotton
Detailed data title: Percent of cotton planted in United States that is genetically modified to be insect-resistant (Bt), but not herbicide-tolerant (HT)
Source: USDA
See what else correlates with GMO use in cotton

Arson in New Hampshire
Detailed data title: The arson rate per 100,000 residents in New Hampshire
Source: FBI Criminal Justice Information Services
See what else correlates with Arson in New Hampshire

Correlation r = 0.9257785 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r2 = 0.8570659 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 85.7% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Arson in New Hampshire) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., GMO use in cotton) over the 23 years from 2000 through 2022.

p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 2.5E-10. 0.0000000002483041725647495000
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme. More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.93 in 2.5E-8% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 4,027,318,549 random variables You don't actually need 4 billion variables to find a correlation like this one. I don't have that many variables in my database. You can also correlate variables that are not independent. I do this a lot.

p-value calculations are useful for understanding the probability of a result happening by chance. They are most useful when used to highlight the risk of a fluke outcome. For example, if you calculate a p-value of 0.30, the risk that the result is a fluke is high. It is good to know that! But there are lots of ways to get a p-value of less than 0.01, as evidenced by this project.

In this particular case, the values are so extreme as to be meaningless. That's why no one reports p-values with specificity after they drop below 0.01.

Just to be clear: I'm being completely transparent about the calculations. There is no math trickery. This is just how statistics shakes out when you calculate hundreds of millions of random correlations.
with the same 22 degrees of freedom, Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 22 because we have two variables measured over a period of 23 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.83, 0.97 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!


All values for the years included above: If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.
20002001200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019202020212022
GMO use in cotton (GMO cotton %)151313141618181718171517148554533533
Arson in New Hampshire (Arson rate)17.621.22218.520.224.924.922.622.918.623.820.124.616.913.810.5139.68.99.311.18.48.8




Why this works

  1. Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
  2. Lack of causal connection: There is probably Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
    no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
  3. Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
    p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.




Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."


# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([15,13,13,14,16,18,18,17,18,17,15,17,14,8,5,5,4,5,3,3,5,3,3,])
array_2 = np.array([17.6,21.2,22,18.5,20.2,24.9,24.9,22.6,22.9,18.6,23.8,20.1,24.6,16.9,13.8,10.5,13,9.6,8.9,9.3,11.1,8.4,8.8,])
array_1_name = "GMO use in cotton"
array_2_name = "Arson in New Hampshire"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)



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For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

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