Spurious correlation #4,252 · View random
A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and the second variable is Arson in United States. The chart goes from 2012 to 2022, and the two variables track closely in value over that time.

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and the second variable is Arson in United States. The chart goes from 2012 to 2022, and the two variables track closely in value over that time.

Download png, svg

AI explanation

As the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota decreased, there was a corresponding decrease in the amount of blood being drawn. This led to a nationwide reduction in the availability of blood, creating a shortage. As a result, there were fewer vampires in the United States. With fewer vampires around to cause mischief, the incidence of arson decreased. Remember, this is all a part of a wild and fictitious causal chain!

^{Show image generation prompt} Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Description: A joyful and whimsical image that you would expect to encounter while scrolling through Reddit. This scene portrays a serene clinic nestled in the quiet and tranquil state of Minnesota. Inside, a small group of phlebotomists is shown meticulously and tenderly drawing blood from a few patients. Meanwhile, in the broader context of the United States, the incidence of arson is decreasing. The correlation unfolds as the reduced presence of phlebotomists leads to a decline in the number of blood drawings, resulting in a proportional decrease in fiery behavior across the nation. Visual prompt: An image of a cozy and peaceful clinic environment in Minnesota, with phlebotomists attending to patients while a map of the United States in the background illustrates the reduction in arson incidents, symbolizing the unexpected link between blood drawing and decreased fiery behavior. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.

This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and Arson in United States. Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: a funny image you would see on reddit Minimalism Pop art Art nouveau High-tech
ChatGPT: a funny image you would see on reddit

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and Arson in United States, in the following situation: Fewer phlebotomists meant fewer people getting their blood boiling, leading to a nationwide decrease in fiery behavior.. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: In a calm and quiet clinic in Minnesota, only a handful of phlebotomists are present, gently drawing blood from patients. Meanwhile, across the nation, the number of arson incidents is decreasing. The lack of phlebotomists means fewer people are getting their blood drawn, leading to a decrease in fiery behavior throughout the United States.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ a funny image you would see on reddit ] and depicting this scene: In a calm and quiet clinic in Minnesota, only a handful of phlebotomists are present, gently drawing blood from patients. Meanwhile, across the nation, the number of arson incidents is decreasing. The lack of phlebotomists means fewer people are getting their blood drawn, leading to a decrease in fiery behavior throughout the United States. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Description: A joyful and whimsical image that you would expect to encounter while scrolling through Reddit. This scene portrays a serene clinic nestled in the quiet and tranquil state of Minnesota. Inside, a small group of phlebotomists is shown meticulously and tenderly drawing blood from a few patients. Meanwhile, in the broader context of the United States, the incidence of arson is decreasing. The correlation unfolds as the reduced presence of phlebotomists leads to a decline in the number of blood drawings, resulting in a proportional decrease in fiery behavior across the nation. Visual prompt: An image of a cozy and peaceful clinic environment in Minnesota, with phlebotomists attending to patients while a map of the United States in the background illustrates the reduction in arson incidents, symbolizing the unexpected link between blood drawing and decreased fiery behavior.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.
^{Show prompt for explanation} Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how a decrease in The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota caused Arson in United States to decrease.\Make it sound serious until the end.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.01)

Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States

The Journal of Unusual Cross-Disciplinary Studies

Jan 2024

Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real!

^{Show prompt used to generate this paper} Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and Arson in United States. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then name a couple popular internet memes that are related to one of the topics.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper presents a compelling exploration of the relationship between the number of phlebotomists in the state of Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Leveraging data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team delved into this unexpected and seemingly unrelated connection. The findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the time period spanning from 2012 to 2022. Through this investigation, we shed light on the curious interplay between the seemingly disparate fields of phlebotomy and arson, offering a thought-provoking contribution to both the realms of public health and criminal justice. This study prompts further inquiry into the unexpected and often enigmatic associations within our societal fabric, serving as a reminder that in the pursuit of knowledge, one must always have an open mind and a keen sense of curiosity.

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
Fire, blood, and the peculiar intersection of phlebotomists and arson have long intrigued scholars and practitioners alike. The seemingly unrelated worlds of healthcare and criminality have been thrust into an unexpected entanglement in our study, "Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States." The initial inspiration for this investigation arose from a shared curiosity among our research team, a curiosity that persisted despite the raised eyebrows and quizzical looks from our colleagues. Nonetheless, armed with an arsenal of statistical analyses and a healthy dose of skepticism, we boldly marched forward into this unexplored terrain.
It is no secret that the field of phlebotomy, despite its metaphorical associations with vampires and Halloween costumes, plays a crucial role in healthcare, deftly extracting blood samples with the precision of a seasoned sommelier decanting a prized bottle of wine. Meanwhile, arson, with its fiery theatrics and destructive tendencies, often elicits images of rogue pyromaniacs and overzealous campfire enthusiasts - not exactly the most obvious bedfellows for phlebotomy.
As proponents of "science with a side of whimsy," we could not resist the allure of uncovering the potential link between these seemingly disparate realms. Our intrepid journey into the labyrinth of data sources brought us to the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, where we mined for nuggets of insight amidst the sea of numbers and codes. It was there, amid the maze of spreadsheets and datasets, that we unearthed a quite unexpected correlation, akin to stumbling upon a gleaming treasure chest while picnicking in the foothills of Mount Research.
The results of our analysis yielded a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126, a number that seemed to wink mischievously at us from the confines of our computer screens. This, coupled with a p-value of less than 0.01, sent ripples of astonishment through our team, prompting exclamations of "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle!" from the most reserved of our researchers. The statistical significance of our findings imbued our exploration with an air of legitimacy, proving that sometimes, the most unexpected correlations can be more than mere statistical flings - they might just be a bonafide relationship, akin to a scientific version of an unforeseen rom-com.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

In "The Phlebotomist's Handbook," Smith meticulously details the intricacies of blood drawing, emphasizing the importance of precision and finesse in this venerable art. Meanwhile, Doe, in "Arson: A Comprehensive Study," provides a comprehensive examination of the motivations and methods behind the fiery phenomenon, offering insights into the minds of those who revel in the glow of burning embers. Jones, in "Minnesota Labor Statistics: A Decade of Data," presents a meticulous analysis of labor trends in the Land of 10,000 Lakes, delving into the intricate dance of employment figures in the region.

Beyond the confines of academic tomes, we turn our attention to non-fiction works that offer tangential insights. "The Fire Next Time" by James Baldwin presents a thought-provoking meditation on racial and religious tensions, drawing parallels to the fervent heat of arson that sweeps through communities. On a lighter note, "Blood, Bones, and Butter: The Inadvertent Education of a Reluctant Chef" by Gabrielle Hamilton offers a culinary journey that, while seemingly unrelated, sheds light on the intimate relationship between extraction and creation - a thematic underpinning that resonates with the art of phlebotomy. In the realm of fiction, "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" by Stieg Larsson weaves a tale of intrigue and investigation, where blood and fire intersect in unexpected ways, echoing the enigmatic connection we seek to unravel in our study.

Not to be outdone, the internet meme-sphere provides its own quirky contributions, with the "This is fine" dog meme serving as a poignant reminder of how one might nonchalantly navigate through the flames of adversity – much like the confounding relationship between phlebotomy and arson that we aim to elucidate. Furthermore, the "I see what you did there" meme captures the essence of the subtle but significant correlations we've uncovered, signifying that sometimes, the most unexpected connections provoke the proverbial raising of eyebrows and the knowing wink of recognition.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and Arson in United States. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Bureau of Larbor Statistics and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services . You used data from 2012 to 2022

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper presents a compelling exploration of the relationship between the number of phlebotomists in the state of Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Leveraging data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team delved into this unexpected and seemingly unrelated connection. The findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the time period spanning from 2012 to 2022. Through this investigation, we shed light on the curious interplay between the seemingly disparate fields of phlebotomy and arson, offering a thought-provoking contribution to both the realms of public health and criminal justice. This study prompts further inquiry into the unexpected and often enigmatic associations within our societal fabric, serving as a reminder that in the pursuit of knowledge, one must always have an open mind and a keen sense of curiosity.

[[INTRODUCTION]]
Fire, blood, and the peculiar intersection of phlebotomists and arson have long intrigued scholars and practitioners alike. The seemingly unrelated worlds of healthcare and criminality have been thrust into an unexpected entanglement in our study, "Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States." The initial inspiration for this investigation arose from a shared curiosity among our research team, a curiosity that persisted despite the raised eyebrows and quizzical looks from our colleagues. Nonetheless, armed with an arsenal of statistical analyses and a healthy dose of skepticism, we boldly marched forward into this unexplored terrain.
It is no secret that the field of phlebotomy, despite its metaphorical associations with vampires and Halloween costumes, plays a crucial role in healthcare, deftly extracting blood samples with the precision of a seasoned sommelier decanting a prized bottle of wine. Meanwhile, arson, with its fiery theatrics and destructive tendencies, often elicits images of rogue pyromaniacs and overzealous campfire enthusiasts - not exactly the most obvious bedfellows for phlebotomy.
As proponents of "science with a side of whimsy," we could not resist the allure of uncovering the potential link between these seemingly disparate realms. Our intrepid journey into the labyrinth of data sources brought us to the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, where we mined for nuggets of insight amidst the sea of numbers and codes. It was there, amid the maze of spreadsheets and datasets, that we unearthed a quite unexpected correlation, akin to stumbling upon a gleaming treasure chest while picnicking in the foothills of Mount Research.
The results of our analysis yielded a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126, a number that seemed to wink mischievously at us from the confines of our computer screens. This, coupled with a p-value of less than 0.01, sent ripples of astonishment through our team, prompting exclamations of "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle!" from the most reserved of our researchers. The statistical significance of our findings imbued our exploration with an air of legitimacy, proving that sometimes, the most unexpected correlations can be more than mere statistical flings - they might just be a bonafide relationship, akin to a scientific version of an unforeseen rom-com.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

ChatGPT:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

To unpack the curiously entangled relationship between the number of phlebotomists in the land of 10,000 lakes and the incidence of fiery shenanigans across the expanse of the United States, our research team embarked on a methodological quest that would make even the most intrepid of adventurers nod in approval.

Data Collection:
Our expedition into the world of empirical inquiry began with a comprehensive scouring of the digital seas, casting our proverbial nets across the internet's vast expanse. While our search spanned far and wide, the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services emerged as our steadfast allies, providing us with a treasure trove of numerical gems and statistical gems to fuel our quest. We sauntered through the data from 2012 to 2022, a period marbled with enough intrigue and statistical tidbits to keep even the most discerning of data enthusiasts thoroughly entertained.

The Phlebotomist Count:
Ah, the noble phlebotomist, skilled in the art of delicately extracting the elixir of life from the veins of willing participants. To capture the number of these healthcare maestros gracing the land of Minnesota, we delved into the annals of official records, carefully recording the ebb and flow of phlebotomist numbers over the years. These data, akin to a fine vintage, offered a glimpse into the oscillating rhythms of phlebotomist deployment, allowing us to scrutinize their potential influence on the broader landscape of societal intricacies.

Arson Incidents Across the United States:
In the realm of conflagrations and fiery escapades, the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services stood as our beacon of illumination, illuminating the path to a wealth of arson-related data. We meticulously tallied the occurrences of arson across the United States, plotting their ebbs and flows like cartographers charting the undulations of a tempestuous sea. With due diligence, we cataloged the intricate tapestry of arson incidents, readying ourselves to ascertain their potential dance with the phlebotomist count in Minnesota.

Statistical Wizardry:
Armed with a potent blend of computation and conjecture, we unleashed the full arsenal of statistical analyses upon the amassed data. The correlation coefficient, that enigmatic figure of speech for the dalliance between two variables, eagerly divulged the intricacies of the relationship between phlebotomists and arson. With bated breath, we awaited the emergence of the revelation-seeking p-value, a measure that would either reaffirm our suspicions or leave us ruminating on the caprices of statistical mischief. And lo, the numbers did not disappoint, delivering unto us a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 and a p-value of less than 0.01, akin to a resounding applause from the statistical deities.

In summary, our methodological odyssey, colored by the interplay of data, computation, and a healthy dose of academic moxie, granted us passage into the realm of inquiry and discovery. Through this journey, we leveraged the tools of empirical investigation to shed light on the playful dalliance between phlebotomists in Minnesota and the fiery capers of arson across the United States.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and Arson in United States. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Bureau of Larbor Statistics and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services .

For the time period 2012 to 2022, you found a correlation 0.9164126, r-squared of 0.8398120, and p < 0.01.

One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper presents a compelling exploration of the relationship between the number of phlebotomists in the state of Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Leveraging data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team delved into this unexpected and seemingly unrelated connection. The findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the time period spanning from 2012 to 2022. Through this investigation, we shed light on the curious interplay between the seemingly disparate fields of phlebotomy and arson, offering a thought-provoking contribution to both the realms of public health and criminal justice. This study prompts further inquiry into the unexpected and often enigmatic associations within our societal fabric, serving as a reminder that in the pursuit of knowledge, one must always have an open mind and a keen sense of curiosity.

-------

And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
Fire, blood, and the peculiar intersection of phlebotomists and arson have long intrigued scholars and practitioners alike. The seemingly unrelated worlds of healthcare and criminality have been thrust into an unexpected entanglement in our study, "Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States." The initial inspiration for this investigation arose from a shared curiosity among our research team, a curiosity that persisted despite the raised eyebrows and quizzical looks from our colleagues. Nonetheless, armed with an arsenal of statistical analyses and a healthy dose of skepticism, we boldly marched forward into this unexplored terrain.
It is no secret that the field of phlebotomy, despite its metaphorical associations with vampires and Halloween costumes, plays a crucial role in healthcare, deftly extracting blood samples with the precision of a seasoned sommelier decanting a prized bottle of wine. Meanwhile, arson, with its fiery theatrics and destructive tendencies, often elicits images of rogue pyromaniacs and overzealous campfire enthusiasts - not exactly the most obvious bedfellows for phlebotomy.
As proponents of "science with a side of whimsy," we could not resist the allure of uncovering the potential link between these seemingly disparate realms. Our intrepid journey into the labyrinth of data sources brought us to the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, where we mined for nuggets of insight amidst the sea of numbers and codes. It was there, amid the maze of spreadsheets and datasets, that we unearthed a quite unexpected correlation, akin to stumbling upon a gleaming treasure chest while picnicking in the foothills of Mount Research.
The results of our analysis yielded a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126, a number that seemed to wink mischievously at us from the confines of our computer screens. This, coupled with a p-value of less than 0.01, sent ripples of astonishment through our team, prompting exclamations of "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle!" from the most reserved of our researchers. The statistical significance of our findings imbued our exploration with an air of legitimacy, proving that sometimes, the most unexpected correlations can be more than mere statistical flings - they might just be a bonafide relationship, akin to a scientific version of an unforeseen rom-com.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[RESULTS]]

ChatGPT:

[[RESULTS]]

The results of our analysis unveiled a remarkably strong correlation between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Over the 10-year period from 2012 to 2022, we found a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126, signifying a robust positive relationship between these two seemingly unrelated variables. This correlation was further supported by a substantial r-squared value of 0.8398120, implying that approximately 84% of the variation in arson incidents can be explained by the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota.

Fig. 1 illustrates the scatterplot that captures this striking correlation, akin to a celestial dance between blood draws and fiery mishaps. The upward trend in the data points resembles the trajectory of a phoenix rising from the ashes, symbolizing the unexpected unity of phlebotomists and the phenomena of arson. The remarkable alignment of these data points serves as a visual testament to the compelling association that our analysis has brought to light.

It is important to note that while correlation does not imply causation, the strength of this relationship prompts further contemplation and inquiry into the intricate interplay between healthcare workforce dynamics and criminal activities. The statistical significance, with a p-value of less than 0.01, adds a layer of intrigue to our findings, leaving us pondering the undercurrents of causative threads weaving through these disparate domains.

In essence, our results not only confirm the unexpected correlation between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and arson across the United States but also beckon us to delve deeper into the enigmatic nexus of seemingly unrelated phenomena. This study stands as a reminder that in the vast tapestry of statistical relationships, even the most peculiar pairings may hold unforeseen implications, akin to a scientific eureka moment wrapped in a cloak of whimsy and wonder.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and Arson in United States. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
"Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper presents a compelling exploration of the relationship between the number of phlebotomists in the state of Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Leveraging data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team delved into this unexpected and seemingly unrelated connection. The findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the time period spanning from 2012 to 2022. Through this investigation, we shed light on the curious interplay between the seemingly disparate fields of phlebotomy and arson, offering a thought-provoking contribution to both the realms of public health and criminal justice. This study prompts further inquiry into the unexpected and often enigmatic associations within our societal fabric, serving as a reminder that in the pursuit of knowledge, one must always have an open mind and a keen sense of curiosity.

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
In "The Phlebotomist's Handbook," Smith meticulously details the intricacies of blood drawing, emphasizing the importance of precision and finesse in this venerable art. Meanwhile, Doe, in "Arson: A Comprehensive Study," provides a comprehensive examination of the motivations and methods behind the fiery phenomenon, offering insights into the minds of those who revel in the glow of burning embers. Jones, in "Minnesota Labor Statistics: A Decade of Data," presents a meticulous analysis of labor trends in the Land of 10,000 Lakes, delving into the intricate dance of employment figures in the region.
Beyond the confines of academic tomes, we turn our attention to non-fiction works that offer tangential insights. "The Fire Next Time" by James Baldwin presents a thought-provoking meditation on racial and religious tensions, drawing parallels to the fervent heat of arson that sweeps through communities. On a lighter note, "Blood, Bones, and Butter: The Inadvertent Education of a Reluctant Chef" by Gabrielle Hamilton offers a culinary journey that, while seemingly unrelated, sheds light on the intimate relationship between extraction and creation - a thematic underpinning that resonates with the art of phlebotomy. In the realm of fiction, "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo" by Stieg Larsson weaves a tale of intrigue and investigation, where blood and fire intersect in unexpected ways, echoing the enigmatic connection we seek to unravel in our study.
Not to be outdone, the internet meme-sphere provides its own quirky contributions, with the "This is fine" dog meme serving as a poignant reminder of how one might nonchalantly navigate through the flames of adversity – much like the confounding relationship between phlebotomy and arson that we aim to elucidate. Furthermore, the "I see what you did there" meme captures the essence of the subtle but significant correlations we've uncovered, signifying that sometimes, the most unexpected connections provoke the proverbial raising of eyebrows and the knowing wink of recognition.

[[RESULTS]]
The results of our analysis unveiled a remarkably strong correlation between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Over the 10-year period from 2012 to 2022, we found a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126, signifying a robust positive relationship between these two seemingly unrelated variables. This correlation was further supported by a substantial r-squared value of 0.8398120, implying that approximately 84% of the variation in arson incidents can be explained by the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota.
Fig. 1 illustrates the scatterplot that captures this striking correlation, akin to a celestial dance between blood draws and fiery mishaps. The upward trend in the data points resembles the trajectory of a phoenix rising from the ashes, symbolizing the unexpected unity of phlebotomists and the phenomena of arson. The remarkable alignment of these data points serves as a visual testament to the compelling association that our analysis has brought to light.
It is important to note that while correlation does not imply causation, the strength of this relationship prompts further contemplation and inquiry into the intricate interplay between healthcare workforce dynamics and criminal activities. The statistical significance, with a p-value of less than 0.01, adds a layer of intrigue to our findings, leaving us pondering the undercurrents of causative threads weaving through these disparate domains.
In essence, our results not only confirm the unexpected correlation between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and arson across the United States but also beckon us to delve deeper into the enigmatic nexus of seemingly unrelated phenomena. This study stands as a reminder that in the vast tapestry of statistical relationships, even the most peculiar pairings may hold unforeseen implications, akin to a scientific eureka moment wrapped in a cloak of whimsy and wonder.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]

ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

The robust correlation identified between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States is both intriguing and, dare I say, incendiary. Our findings lend empirical support to the notion that the presence of phlebotomists may have an unforeseen influence on the occurrence of arson, igniting a fervent desire for further exploration. Much like talented phlebotomists deftly draw blood from a vein, our study has untangled a complex web of statistical associations, revealing a relationship that sparkles with statistical significance.

Our research aligns with Smith's "The Phlebotomist's Handbook," where precision and finesse are emphasized – qualities that are evidently mirrored in the meticulous nature of our statistical analysis. Moreover, Doe’s insights into the motivations behind arson find an unexpected parallel in the hidden fires of statistical correlation, fueling our conviction in the importance of rigor and insight. Jones’s analysis of labor trends in Minnesota, while seemingly mundane on the surface, conceals an ember of truth that has burned brightly in our study, illustrating the warmth of statistical inquiry.

The tangential insights from non-fiction and fictional works, while seemingly offbeat, play a subtle yet significant role in framing the unexpected connections we've uncovered. The metaphorical flames of intrigue that burn through these literary references provide kindling for the burning desire to further tease out the nuanced threads that bind phlebotomists and arson in our societal tapestry.

Unquestionably, the internet meme-sphere has not failed to lend its support. The "This is fine" dog meme's stoic resilience reminds us of the quiet fortitude required in statistical analysis, while the "I see what you did there" meme playfully captures the essence of uncovering subtle but significant correlations – an appreciation for the comical amid the analytical.

The implications of our results stretch beyond statistical curiosities and into the realm of societal and public health significance, reminiscent of a fireworks display illuminating uncharted territories of inquiry. The correlation we've uncovered beckons us to contemplate the unexpected interplay between healthcare dynamics and criminal activities, offering a scintillating avenue for future research.

In closing, our study serves as a testament to the serendipitous nature of scientific inquiry, a reminder that even the most unlikely pairings can kindle meaningful insights. Like a well-crafted pun, the correlation between phlebotomists and arson – while unexpected – holds the potential to ignite a blaze of understanding in the vast expanse of statistical relationships.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and Arson in United States. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
"Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper presents a compelling exploration of the relationship between the number of phlebotomists in the state of Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Leveraging data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team delved into this unexpected and seemingly unrelated connection. The findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the time period spanning from 2012 to 2022. Through this investigation, we shed light on the curious interplay between the seemingly disparate fields of phlebotomy and arson, offering a thought-provoking contribution to both the realms of public health and criminal justice. This study prompts further inquiry into the unexpected and often enigmatic associations within our societal fabric, serving as a reminder that in the pursuit of knowledge, one must always have an open mind and a keen sense of curiosity.

[[INTRDUCTION]]
Fire, blood, and the peculiar intersection of phlebotomists and arson have long intrigued scholars and practitioners alike. The seemingly unrelated worlds of healthcare and criminality have been thrust into an unexpected entanglement in our study, "Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States." The initial inspiration for this investigation arose from a shared curiosity among our research team, a curiosity that persisted despite the raised eyebrows and quizzical looks from our colleagues. Nonetheless, armed with an arsenal of statistical analyses and a healthy dose of skepticism, we boldly marched forward into this unexplored terrain.
It is no secret that the field of phlebotomy, despite its metaphorical associations with vampires and Halloween costumes, plays a crucial role in healthcare, deftly extracting blood samples with the precision of a seasoned sommelier decanting a prized bottle of wine. Meanwhile, arson, with its fiery theatrics and destructive tendencies, often elicits images of rogue pyromaniacs and overzealous campfire enthusiasts - not exactly the most obvious bedfellows for phlebotomy.
As proponents of "science with a side of whimsy," we could not resist the allure of uncovering the potential link between these seemingly disparate realms. Our intrepid journey into the labyrinth of data sources brought us to the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, where we mined for nuggets of insight amidst the sea of numbers and codes. It was there, amid the maze of spreadsheets and datasets, that we unearthed a quite unexpected correlation, akin to stumbling upon a gleaming treasure chest while picnicking in the foothills of Mount Research.
The results of our analysis yielded a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126, a number that seemed to wink mischievously at us from the confines of our computer screens. This, coupled with a p-value of less than 0.01, sent ripples of astonishment through our team, prompting exclamations of "Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle!" from the most reserved of our researchers. The statistical significance of our findings imbued our exploration with an air of legitimacy, proving that sometimes, the most unexpected correlations can be more than mere statistical flings - they might just be a bonafide relationship, akin to a scientific version of an unforeseen rom-com.

[[RESULTS]]
The results of our analysis unveiled a remarkably strong correlation between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Over the 10-year period from 2012 to 2022, we found a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126, signifying a robust positive relationship between these two seemingly unrelated variables. This correlation was further supported by a substantial r-squared value of 0.8398120, implying that approximately 84% of the variation in arson incidents can be explained by the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota.
Fig. 1 illustrates the scatterplot that captures this striking correlation, akin to a celestial dance between blood draws and fiery mishaps. The upward trend in the data points resembles the trajectory of a phoenix rising from the ashes, symbolizing the unexpected unity of phlebotomists and the phenomena of arson. The remarkable alignment of these data points serves as a visual testament to the compelling association that our analysis has brought to light.
It is important to note that while correlation does not imply causation, the strength of this relationship prompts further contemplation and inquiry into the intricate interplay between healthcare workforce dynamics and criminal activities. The statistical significance, with a p-value of less than 0.01, adds a layer of intrigue to our findings, leaving us pondering the undercurrents of causative threads weaving through these disparate domains.
In essence, our results not only confirm the unexpected correlation between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and arson across the United States but also beckon us to delve deeper into the enigmatic nexus of seemingly unrelated phenomena. This study stands as a reminder that in the vast tapestry of statistical relationships, even the most peculiar pairings may hold unforeseen implications, akin to a scientific eureka moment wrapped in a cloak of whimsy and wonder.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]

ChatGPT:

[[CONCLUSION]]

In conclusion, our investigation has not only unraveled a fascinating correlation between the number of phlebotomists in Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States but has also shone a light on the unexpected and enigmatic associations within our societal fabric. The robust positive relationship with a correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 has left us pondering the intricacies of statistical romance and the potential for a true "phlebotomist-arson" partnership.

The visual representation of this intriguing correlation in Fig. 1 serves as a quirky reminder that in the realm of statistical analysis, even the most unexpected pairings can lead to remarkable insights – much like stumbling upon a hidden treasure trove in the labyrinth of data. The statistical significance of our findings, with a p-value of less than 0.01, further cements the legitimacy of this unexpected relationship, akin to a scientific "meet-cute" that defies traditional expectations.

As we reflect on the implications of these findings, we are left with no doubt that the interplay between seemingly disparate domains merits further exploration and contemplation, much like a complex plot twist in a scientific thriller. However, we dare not tip-toe deeper into this enigmatic nexus, for fear of uncovering a clandestine network of bloodthirsty arsonists connected to the unsuspecting world of phlebotomy.

Hence, in the spirit of scientific prudence and possibly a touch of self-preservation, we assert that no further research is needed in this area. After all, sometimes it's best to let sleeping statistical dragons lie... or perhaps rise from the ashes, in this case.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

The Journal of Unusual Cross-Disciplinary Studies

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

The Center for Fire Science and Phlebotomy Studies

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States with an abstract of This paper presents a compelling exploration of the relationship between the number of phlebotomists in the state of Minnesota and incidents of arson across the United States. Leveraging data from the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team delved into this unexpected and seemingly unrelated connection. The findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9164126 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the time period spanning from 2012 to 2022. Through this investigation, we shed light on the curious interplay between the seemingly disparate fields of phlebotomy and arson, offering a thought-provoking contribution to both the realms of public health and criminal justice. This study prompts further inquiry into the unexpected and often enigmatic associations within our societal fabric, serving as a reminder that in the pursuit of knowledge, one must always have an open mind and a keen sense of curiosity.

ChatGPT:

phlebotomist count, Minnesota, arson, United States, correlation, Bureau of Labor Statistics, FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, societal associations, public health, criminal justice, data analysis

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.

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Data details

The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota
Detailed data title: BLS estimate of phlebotomists in Minnesota
Source: Bureau of Larbor Statistics
See what else correlates with The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota

Arson in United States
Detailed data title: The arson rate per 100,000 residents in United States
Source: FBI Criminal Justice Information Services
See what else correlates with Arson in United States

Correlation r = 0.9164126 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r² = 0.8398120 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 84% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Arson in United States) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota) over the 11 years from 2012 through 2022.

p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 7.3E-5.^Show 0.0000731549100937317200000000
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme.^Note More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.92 in 0.0073% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 13,670 random variables^Note Which I absolutely did.
with the same 10 degrees of freedom, ^Note Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 10 because we have two variables measured over a period of 11 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.7, 0.98 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
^{Read more about the confidence interval} The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!

All values for the years included above: ^Note If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.

	2012	2013	2014	2015	2016	2017	2018	2019	2020	2021	2022
The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota (Phlebotomists)	2320	1930	1820	1700	1840	1920	1600	1610	1710	1170	1250
Arson in United States (Arson rate)	17.6	14.9	14.5	13.7	14.1	13.2	12	11	13.9	8.9	11.6

Why this works

Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
Lack of causal connection: There is probably^Note Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple^Note Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.

Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. ^{Show the steps to do this.} Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."

# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([2320,1930,1820,1700,1840,1920,1600,1610,1710,1170,1250,])
array_2 = np.array([17.6,14.9,14.5,13.7,14.1,13.2,12,11,13.9,8.9,11.6,])
array_1_name = "The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota"
array_2_name = "Arson in United States"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)

Reuseable content

You may re-use the images on this page for any purpose, even commercial purposes, without asking for permission. The only requirement is that you attribute Tyler Vigen. ^Note Attribution can take many different forms. If you leave the "tylervigen.com" link in the image, that satisfies it just fine. If you remove it and move it to a footnote, that's fine too. You can also just write "Charts courtesy of Tyler Vigen" at the bottom of an article.

You do not need to attribute "the spurious correlations website," and you don't even need to link here if you don't want to. I don't gain anything from pageviews. There are no ads on this site, there is nothing for sale, and I am not for hire.

For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

When spoken, my last name is pronounced "vegan," like I don't eat meat.

Full license details.
For more on re-use permissions, or to get a signed release form, see tylervigen.com/permission.

Download images for these variables:

High resolution line chart ^Note The image linked here is a Scalable Vector Graphic (SVG). It is the highest resolution that is possible to achieve. It scales up beyond the size of the observable universe without pixelating. You do not need to email me asking if I have a higher resolution image. I do not. The physical limitations of our universe prevent me from providing you with an image that is any higher resolution than this one.

If you insert it into a PowerPoint presentation (a tool well-known for managing things that are the scale of the universe), you can right-click > "Ungroup" or "Create Shape" and then edit the lines and text directly. You can also change the colors this way.

Alternatively you can use a tool like Inkscape.
High resolution line chart, optimized for mobile
Alternative high resolution line chart
Scatterplot
Portable line chart (png)
Portable line chart (png), optimized for mobile
Line chart for only The number of phlebotomists in Minnesota
Line chart for only Arson in United States
AI-generated correlation image
The spurious research paper: Drawing Blood to Understand Fire: The Correlation Between Phlebotomist Count in Minnesota and Arson Across the United States

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Correlation ID: 4252 · Black Variable ID: 19215 · Red Variable ID: 20038


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