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Spurious correlation #3,758 · View random

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is US per-person consumption of bottled water and the second variable is Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED).  The chart goes from 2002 to 2022, and the two variables track closely in value over that time. Small Image
Download png
, svg

AI explanation

As people drank more bottled water, they stayed more hydrated. This led to increased brain function and decision-making skills. With the population making smarter choices, there was a surge in demand for electricity, ultimately boosting Consolidated Edison's stock price. "Who knew that the key to a shocking stock boost was just a bottle of water away!"

Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Generate a photorealistic cityscape where individuals are strolling through a vibrant urban environment. The people in the scene are depicted as carrying and drinking bottled water while walking, with one hand casually holding a smartphone or tablet displaying the stock price chart for Consolidated Edison (ED). As they take sips from their water bottles, they glance at the stock information on their devices and nod in agreement, indicating a sense of recognition and potential investment opportunity. The scene should portray the city's lively atmosphere and the diverse range of people engaging with technology and staying hydrated, exuding a sense of modern urban life. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.
This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: A Discovery magazine cover image Futuristic Cubism Voxel art Photorealism
ChatGPT: Photorealism

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED), in the following situation: Because as people drank more bottled water, they stayed more hydrated, leading to increased brainpower. With all that mental prowess, they realized they should invest in "ED" to keep their portfolios fully charged!. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: In the scene, people are seen carrying and drinking bottled water as they walk through a bustling city. In their other hand, they hold devices displaying Consolidated Edison's stock price. As they take sips of water, they glance at their device and nod in agreement, recognizing the potential of investing in "ED" to keep their portfolios fully charged.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ Photorealism ] and depicting this scene: In the scene, people are seen carrying and drinking bottled water as they walk through a bustling city. In their other hand, they hold devices displaying Consolidated Edison's stock price. As they take sips of water, they glance at their device and nod in agreement, recognizing the potential of investing in "ED" to keep their portfolios fully charged. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Generate a photorealistic cityscape where individuals are strolling through a vibrant urban environment. The people in the scene are depicted as carrying and drinking bottled water while walking, with one hand casually holding a smartphone or tablet displaying the stock price chart for Consolidated Edison (ED). As they take sips from their water bottles, they glance at the stock information on their devices and nod in agreement, indicating a sense of recognition and potential investment opportunity. The scene should portray the city's lively atmosphere and the diverse range of people engaging with technology and staying hydrated, exuding a sense of modern urban life.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how an increase in US per-person consumption of bottled water caused Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED) to increase. Add a funny one-liner at the end.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.01)
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

The Journal of Quirky Correlations

Jan 2024

Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real!
Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.




Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You write titles and abstracts of goofy academic research papers.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, and add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please draft the title and abstract of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Make the title seem clever.

Your research team used data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) to assess this nagging question. You found a correlation coefficient of 0.9380347 and p < 0.01 for 2002 to 2022.

Please respond in this format (replace "Lorem ipsum dolor sit" with your title and abstract)

[[TITLE]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit

[[ABSTRACT]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit



ChatGPT:
[[TITLE]]
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the introduction section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the introduction section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[INTRODUCTION]]



ChatGPT:
[[INTRODUCTION]]

Ah, the age-old quest for something to wet our whistles! As the world goes round and round, our journey for hydration takes us to unexpected shores, exploring the depths of the stock market. In this paper, we plunge into the murky waters of statistical analysis to unravel the fascinating connection between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED).

As researchers often say, when life gives you data, make statistical lemonade – or in our case, perhaps a refreshing bottled water – as we embark on a journey to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. Buckle up for a wild ride as we navigate through the currents of Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) data from the years 2002 to 2022.

We were initially skeptical about finding any meaningful relationship between bottled water consumption and the stock prices – after all, it seems like comparing apples and oranges, or in this case, water bottles and stock tickers. But as the data flowed through our statistical pipelines, we were surprised to witness a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347. To top it off, the p-value, akin to a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust, clocked in at less than 0.01. It was as if the statistical stars aligned, revealing a correlation that was as clear as the bottled water we were analyzing.

So, grab your bottled water, defrost those statistical ice cubes, and join us as we drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets. As we navigate this ocean of data, we'll uncover the waves that connect a fundamental human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Stick with us as we swim through the deep end of interdisciplinary research, because the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then name a couple popular internet memes that are related to one of the topics.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
Ah, the age-old quest for something to wet our whistles! As the world goes round and round, our journey for hydration takes us to unexpected shores, exploring the depths of the stock market. In this paper, we plunge into the murky waters of statistical analysis to unravel the fascinating connection between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED).
As researchers often say, when life gives you data, make statistical lemonade – or in our case, perhaps a refreshing bottled water – as we embark on a journey to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. Buckle up for a wild ride as we navigate through the currents of Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) data from the years 2002 to 2022.
We were initially skeptical about finding any meaningful relationship between bottled water consumption and the stock prices – after all, it seems like comparing apples and oranges, or in this case, water bottles and stock tickers. But as the data flowed through our statistical pipelines, we were surprised to witness a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347. To top it off, the p-value, akin to a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust, clocked in at less than 0.01. It was as if the statistical stars aligned, revealing a correlation that was as clear as the bottled water we were analyzing.
So, grab your bottled water, defrost those statistical ice cubes, and join us as we drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets. As we navigate this ocean of data, we'll uncover the waves that connect a fundamental human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Stick with us as we swim through the deep end of interdisciplinary research, because the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]



ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

The correlation between the US per-person consumption of bottled water and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED) has puzzled researchers for decades. Smith et al. (2010) attempted to shed light on this perplexing relationship, but their findings merely left the topic all wet. Similarly, Doe and Jones (2015) delved into the depths of consumption patterns and financial market trends, only to find themselves lost at sea, grasping at statistical straws.

Turning the faucet to a more serious note, the work of Wells and Rivers (2018) suggested a potential link between consumer behavior and stock market fluctuations. Their analysis, however, failed to hold water when scrutinized under the relentless downpour of statistical significance tests. Moving on to greener pastures, "Bottled Water Economics" by Aqua and Fizz (2017) presents a compelling argument for the economic impact of bottled water consumption but falls short of making a splash in the realm of stock market correlations.

Now, let's dive into some intriguing texts that, on the surface, may seem unrelated but could provide a unique perspective on our subject. "The Water-Fueled Economy" by Lake et al. (2019) and "The Shocking Connection: Water, Trades, and H20ldings" by Pond (2016) both offer alternative views on the intersection of water and economic systems. While these books don’t directly touch upon Consolidated Edison stock prices, they certainly give us some food for thought – or should I say, some water for thought?

Stepping into fictional waters, "The Aquatic Code" by Dan Brown and "The Stockbroker's Thirst" by Jane Austen (if she wrote about finance instead of romance) might not be real, but they certainly sound like they could be relevant here. If these authors were to take a dip into this peculiar correlation, we might find ourselves in a whirlpool of financial intrigue and aquatic symbolism!

And let’s not forget the cultural phenomena that have made waves on the internet. The "Distracted Boyfriend Meme" and "Woman Yelling at a Cat Meme" (particularly the one with the woman holding a water bottle) both offer a lighthearted reminder that unexpected connections can lead to viral success. Perhaps the unexpected connection between bottled water and stock prices will lead to similarly memorable internet moments.

As we navigate the sea of academic literature, it becomes clear that the connection between bottled water consumption and stock prices is a topic with a depth that few have dared to explore fully. But fear not, dear reader, for in the following sections, we will navigate this ocean of data to find the treasure trove of insights hidden beneath the surface. So, grab a life vest and get ready to ride the waves of statistical analysis and financial discovery!


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) . You used data from 2002 to 2022

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!

[[INTRODUCTION]]
Ah, the age-old quest for something to wet our whistles! As the world goes round and round, our journey for hydration takes us to unexpected shores, exploring the depths of the stock market. In this paper, we plunge into the murky waters of statistical analysis to unravel the fascinating connection between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED).
As researchers often say, when life gives you data, make statistical lemonade – or in our case, perhaps a refreshing bottled water – as we embark on a journey to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. Buckle up for a wild ride as we navigate through the currents of Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) data from the years 2002 to 2022.
We were initially skeptical about finding any meaningful relationship between bottled water consumption and the stock prices – after all, it seems like comparing apples and oranges, or in this case, water bottles and stock tickers. But as the data flowed through our statistical pipelines, we were surprised to witness a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347. To top it off, the p-value, akin to a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust, clocked in at less than 0.01. It was as if the statistical stars aligned, revealing a correlation that was as clear as the bottled water we were analyzing.
So, grab your bottled water, defrost those statistical ice cubes, and join us as we drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets. As we navigate this ocean of data, we'll uncover the waves that connect a fundamental human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Stick with us as we swim through the deep end of interdisciplinary research, because the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]



ChatGPT:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

To explore the tantalizing connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED), we concocted a methodological brew that would make even the most seasoned researcher raise an eyebrow. First, we delved into the ocean of data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) spanning the years 2002 to 2022, setting sail on a whimsical voyage of statistical discovery.

We started by filtering through torrents of data, resembling a sommelier choosing the finest vintage from a sea of wine bottles, to ensure we captured the true essence of this complex relationship. Our research vessel then set out on a statistical expedition, navigating the treacherous waters of regression analysis while weathering the occasional storm of multicollinearity. We used a carefully calibrated compass of statistical software to steer the ship, making sure not to get lost in the sea of variables.

The per-person consumption of bottled water was parsed from the statistical ocean using innovative techniques that could make even the most sophisticated data-mining algorithm blush. As for Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED), we diligently plucked this information from the depths of financial databases, akin to fishing for the most prized catch in the stock market sea.

We then employed a series of advanced statistical tests, akin to performing a rain dance to summon correlations from the heavens, to uncover the relationship between bottled water consumption and ED stock prices. Through the mystical art of correlation analysis, we were able to distill the essence of their connection, revealing a correlation coefficient of 0.9380347 that sparkled like the finest champagne. This was accompanied by a p-value that could quench even the most insatiable statistical thirst, clocking in at less than 0.01.

In summary, our empirical journey through the statistical seas provided us with a refreshing glass of insight into the unexpected interconnectedness of hydration and financial markets. So, sit back, relax, and savor the statistical voyage, for the connections we have unraveled are indeed as clear as the water we drink.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) .

For the time period 2002 to 2022, you found a correlation 0.9380347, r-squared of 0.8799091, and p < 0.01.

One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
Ah, the age-old quest for something to wet our whistles! As the world goes round and round, our journey for hydration takes us to unexpected shores, exploring the depths of the stock market. In this paper, we plunge into the murky waters of statistical analysis to unravel the fascinating connection between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED).
As researchers often say, when life gives you data, make statistical lemonade – or in our case, perhaps a refreshing bottled water – as we embark on a journey to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. Buckle up for a wild ride as we navigate through the currents of Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) data from the years 2002 to 2022.
We were initially skeptical about finding any meaningful relationship between bottled water consumption and the stock prices – after all, it seems like comparing apples and oranges, or in this case, water bottles and stock tickers. But as the data flowed through our statistical pipelines, we were surprised to witness a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347. To top it off, the p-value, akin to a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust, clocked in at less than 0.01. It was as if the statistical stars aligned, revealing a correlation that was as clear as the bottled water we were analyzing.
So, grab your bottled water, defrost those statistical ice cubes, and join us as we drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets. As we navigate this ocean of data, we'll uncover the waves that connect a fundamental human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Stick with us as we swim through the deep end of interdisciplinary research, because the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[RESULTS]]



ChatGPT:

[[RESULTS]]

The findings of our study revealed a striking correlation between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). The correlation coefficient we unearthed was an impressive 0.9380347, indicating a strong positive relationship between these seemingly unrelated variables. To put it in layman's terms, it's as if the flow of bottled water consumption has been in perfect sync with the fluctuation of Consolidated Edison's stock price. It's as surprising as finding a treasure map while digging a well!

The accompanying r-squared value of 0.8799091 further solidifies the significant relationship we observed. This r-squared value can be likened to a buoy bobbing up and down in the statistical sea, marking the confidence we have in the strength of the correlation. In simple terms, we're quite buoyed up about the robustness of this connection.

Additionally, the p-value of less than 0.01 adds a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust to our findings, indicating that the correlation we observed was not a mere coincidence. The p-value is like the golden ticket that assures us we're not just bobbing along in the statistical current for no good reason. It's like finding a diamond ring at the bottom of a statistical ocean - a rare and valuable discovery indeed!

Now, to really visualize the tangible link between these variables, we present Fig. 1, a scatterplot that graphically represents the strong correlation we uncovered. It's like looking at ripples on the statistical pond, showing how the waves of bottled water consumption intermingle with the stock price movements of Consolidated Edison. This figure presents a clear visualization of the ebb and flow of the two variables, as if we're seeing the waves of the stock market reflected in every bottle of water consumed.

In conclusion, our findings not only quench the thirst for knowledge regarding this unexpected connection but also highlight the potential for further interdisciplinary research. As we bid adieu to this research journey, let's raise a glass of bottled water to the unexpected connections we uncovered - after all, the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
The correlation between the US per-person consumption of bottled water and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED) has puzzled researchers for decades. Smith et al. (2010) attempted to shed light on this perplexing relationship, but their findings merely left the topic all wet. Similarly, Doe and Jones (2015) delved into the depths of consumption patterns and financial market trends, only to find themselves lost at sea, grasping at statistical straws.
Turning the faucet to a more serious note, the work of Wells and Rivers (2018) suggested a potential link between consumer behavior and stock market fluctuations. Their analysis, however, failed to hold water when scrutinized under the relentless downpour of statistical significance tests. Moving on to greener pastures, "Bottled Water Economics" by Aqua and Fizz (2017) presents a compelling argument for the economic impact of bottled water consumption but falls short of making a splash in the realm of stock market correlations.
Now, let's dive into some intriguing texts that, on the surface, may seem unrelated but could provide a unique perspective on our subject. "The Water-Fueled Economy" by Lake et al. (2019) and "The Shocking Connection: Water, Trades, and H20ldings" by Pond (2016) both offer alternative views on the intersection of water and economic systems. While these books don’t directly touch upon Consolidated Edison stock prices, they certainly give us some food for thought – or should I say, some water for thought?
Stepping into fictional waters, "The Aquatic Code" by Dan Brown and "The Stockbroker's Thirst" by Jane Austen (if she wrote about finance instead of romance) might not be real, but they certainly sound like they could be relevant here. If these authors were to take a dip into this peculiar correlation, we might find ourselves in a whirlpool of financial intrigue and aquatic symbolism!
And let’s not forget the cultural phenomena that have made waves on the internet. The "Distracted Boyfriend Meme" and "Woman Yelling at a Cat Meme" (particularly the one with the woman holding a water bottle) both offer a lighthearted reminder that unexpected connections can lead to viral success. Perhaps the unexpected connection between bottled water and stock prices will lead to similarly memorable internet moments.
As we navigate the sea of academic literature, it becomes clear that the connection between bottled water consumption and stock prices is a topic with a depth that few have dared to explore fully. But fear not, dear reader, for in the following sections, we will navigate this ocean of data to find the treasure trove of insights hidden beneath the surface. So, grab a life vest and get ready to ride the waves of statistical analysis and financial discovery!

[[RESULTS]]
The findings of our study revealed a striking correlation between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). The correlation coefficient we unearthed was an impressive 0.9380347, indicating a strong positive relationship between these seemingly unrelated variables. To put it in layman's terms, it's as if the flow of bottled water consumption has been in perfect sync with the fluctuation of Consolidated Edison's stock price. It's as surprising as finding a treasure map while digging a well!
The accompanying r-squared value of 0.8799091 further solidifies the significant relationship we observed. This r-squared value can be likened to a buoy bobbing up and down in the statistical sea, marking the confidence we have in the strength of the correlation. In simple terms, we're quite buoyed up about the robustness of this connection.
Additionally, the p-value of less than 0.01 adds a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust to our findings, indicating that the correlation we observed was not a mere coincidence. The p-value is like the golden ticket that assures us we're not just bobbing along in the statistical current for no good reason. It's like finding a diamond ring at the bottom of a statistical ocean - a rare and valuable discovery indeed!
Now, to really visualize the tangible link between these variables, we present Fig. 1, a scatterplot that graphically represents the strong correlation we uncovered. It's like looking at ripples on the statistical pond, showing how the waves of bottled water consumption intermingle with the stock price movements of Consolidated Edison. This figure presents a clear visualization of the ebb and flow of the two variables, as if we're seeing the waves of the stock market reflected in every bottle of water consumed.
In conclusion, our findings not only quench the thirst for knowledge regarding this unexpected connection but also highlight the potential for further interdisciplinary research. As we bid adieu to this research journey, let's raise a glass of bottled water to the unexpected connections we uncovered - after all, the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

Ah, the H2Olding saga continues! Our findings appear to corroborate the prior research, offering refreshing evidence of a significant link between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price. It's as if someone left the faucet running on this correlation, and we managed to catch the flow in our jugs of statistical analysis.

In line with previous wet and wild studies, our results bolster the arguments put forth by Aqua and Fizz (2017) on the economic impact of bottled water consumption. It seems their theories didn't just evaporate into thin air but rather floated to the surface, making a refreshing splash in the world of stock market correlations. Similarly, the work of Wells and Rivers (2018) hinting at a connection between consumer behavior and stock market fluctuations appears to hold water, supporting the idea that these variables are truly in sync, much like synchronized swimmers doing the statistical tango.

We can't help but ponder the depths of Pond's "The Shocking Connection: Water, Trades, and H2Oldings" (2016), as our findings seem to lend credence to the notion that there's more than meets the eye in the realm of water and financial markets. Plus, the humor infused in Dan Brown's "The Aquatic Code" can't be lost on us, as we ourselves have uncovered a code of sorts in this enigmatic correlation – perhaps with fewer secret societies and more p-values.

As intriguing memes on the internet have taught us, unexpected connections can lead to memorable and relatable moments. Who knew that the seemingly unrelated variables of water consumption and stock prices would capture our attention in such a way that the stock market itself almost seems to suddenly thirst for this juicy correlation!

In summary, our results suggest that the relationship between bottled water consumption and stock prices is not merely a drop in the ocean of statistical noise but rather a current of significance that may ripple through further interdisciplinary research. So, let's raise our bottles and propose a toast to the uncharted waters of unexpected correlations – after all, the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED). Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection

[[ABSTRACT]]
In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!

[[INTRDUCTION]]
Ah, the age-old quest for something to wet our whistles! As the world goes round and round, our journey for hydration takes us to unexpected shores, exploring the depths of the stock market. In this paper, we plunge into the murky waters of statistical analysis to unravel the fascinating connection between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED).
As researchers often say, when life gives you data, make statistical lemonade – or in our case, perhaps a refreshing bottled water – as we embark on a journey to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. Buckle up for a wild ride as we navigate through the currents of Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) data from the years 2002 to 2022.
We were initially skeptical about finding any meaningful relationship between bottled water consumption and the stock prices – after all, it seems like comparing apples and oranges, or in this case, water bottles and stock tickers. But as the data flowed through our statistical pipelines, we were surprised to witness a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347. To top it off, the p-value, akin to a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust, clocked in at less than 0.01. It was as if the statistical stars aligned, revealing a correlation that was as clear as the bottled water we were analyzing.
So, grab your bottled water, defrost those statistical ice cubes, and join us as we drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets. As we navigate this ocean of data, we'll uncover the waves that connect a fundamental human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Stick with us as we swim through the deep end of interdisciplinary research, because the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!

[[RESULTS]]
The findings of our study revealed a striking correlation between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). The correlation coefficient we unearthed was an impressive 0.9380347, indicating a strong positive relationship between these seemingly unrelated variables. To put it in layman's terms, it's as if the flow of bottled water consumption has been in perfect sync with the fluctuation of Consolidated Edison's stock price. It's as surprising as finding a treasure map while digging a well!
The accompanying r-squared value of 0.8799091 further solidifies the significant relationship we observed. This r-squared value can be likened to a buoy bobbing up and down in the statistical sea, marking the confidence we have in the strength of the correlation. In simple terms, we're quite buoyed up about the robustness of this connection.
Additionally, the p-value of less than 0.01 adds a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust to our findings, indicating that the correlation we observed was not a mere coincidence. The p-value is like the golden ticket that assures us we're not just bobbing along in the statistical current for no good reason. It's like finding a diamond ring at the bottom of a statistical ocean - a rare and valuable discovery indeed!
Now, to really visualize the tangible link between these variables, we present Fig. 1, a scatterplot that graphically represents the strong correlation we uncovered. It's like looking at ripples on the statistical pond, showing how the waves of bottled water consumption intermingle with the stock price movements of Consolidated Edison. This figure presents a clear visualization of the ebb and flow of the two variables, as if we're seeing the waves of the stock market reflected in every bottle of water consumed.
In conclusion, our findings not only quench the thirst for knowledge regarding this unexpected connection but also highlight the potential for further interdisciplinary research. As we bid adieu to this research journey, let's raise a glass of bottled water to the unexpected connections we uncovered - after all, the truth is out there, and sometimes it's as clear as water!

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[CONCLUSION]]

In conclusion, our research has quenched the thirst for understanding the surprising relationship between US per-person consumption of bottled water and Consolidated Edison's stock price. The correlation coefficient of 0.9380347 was a refreshing revelation, seemingly as clear as a fresh bottle of H2O. It's like finding a unicorn in a statistical forest, a rare and unexpected discovery. The robust r-squared value of 0.8799091 buoyed us up, indicating a strong confidence in the connection. The p-value, akin to a sprinkle of statistical fairy dust, assured us that we're not just floating in a statistical ocean without purpose. It's like finding a pot of gold at the end of a data rainbow!

Our findings, represented in the scatterplot, visually depict the ebb and flow of bottled water consumption and stock price movements, as if we're watching the tides of the stock market in every sip. And so, as we bid adieu to this data-driven adventure, let's raise a glass of bottled water to the unexpected connections we unveiled.

In the spirit of lightheartedness, it seems that no more research is needed in this area. The truth has been as clear as water – or perhaps, as clear as the correlation we uncovered!


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

The Journal of Quirky Correlations


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

The Society for Beverage Consumption and Financial Impact Studies


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled The Thirst for Knowledge: An Exploration of the Bottled Water Consumption-Consolidated Edison Stock Price Connection with an abstract of In this study, we dive into the intriguing relationship between the per-person consumption of bottled water in the US and the stock price of Consolidated Edison (ED). Utilizing data from Statista and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we set out to quench the thirst for understanding the potential correlation between these seemingly unrelated variables. The findings revealed a refreshing correlation coefficient of 0.9380347, with a thirst-quenching p-value of less than 0.01 for the period from 2002 to 2022. Join us as we navigate this ocean of data and explore the currents that connect a basic human necessity with the ebb and flow of a prominent energy company's stock price. Grab your bottled water, sit back, and let's drink in the unexpected connections between hydration and financial markets, as we make waves in the world of interdisciplinary research. Remember, the truth is out there, but sometimes it's as clear as water!

ChatGPT:

bottled water consumption, Consolidated Edison stock price, correlation study, US bottled water consumption, stock price correlation, LSEG Analytics, Refinitiv, correlation coefficient, financial markets, interdisciplinary research

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.



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Data details

US per-person consumption of bottled water
Source: Statista
See what else correlates with US per-person consumption of bottled water

Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED)
Detailed data title: Opening price of Consolidated Edison (ED) on the first trading day of the year
Source: LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv)
Additional Info: Via Microsoft Excel Stockhistory function

See what else correlates with Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED)

Correlation r = 0.9380347 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r2 = 0.8799091 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 88% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED)) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., US per-person consumption of bottled water) over the 21 years from 2002 through 2022.

p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 3.4E-10. 0.0000000003445067643303067000
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme. More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.94 in 3.4E-8% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 2,902,700,625 random variables You don't actually need 2 billion variables to find a correlation like this one. I don't have that many variables in my database. You can also correlate variables that are not independent. I do this a lot.

p-value calculations are useful for understanding the probability of a result happening by chance. They are most useful when used to highlight the risk of a fluke outcome. For example, if you calculate a p-value of 0.30, the risk that the result is a fluke is high. It is good to know that! But there are lots of ways to get a p-value of less than 0.01, as evidenced by this project.

In this particular case, the values are so extreme as to be meaningless. That's why no one reports p-values with specificity after they drop below 0.01.

Just to be clear: I'm being completely transparent about the calculations. There is no math trickery. This is just how statistics shakes out when you calculate hundreds of millions of random correlations.
with the same 20 degrees of freedom, Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 20 because we have two variables measured over a period of 21 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.85, 0.97 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!


All values for the years included above: If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.
200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019202020212022
US per-person consumption of bottled water (Gallons)20.121.623.225.427.62928.527.628.328.730.431.633.635.938.540.642.343.745.24746.5
Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED) (Stock price)40.1142.9543.0643.7646.4348.1248.673945.7349.7662.156.255.1566.163.8573.7284.7576.3290.5572.2785.35




Why this works

  1. Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
  2. Lack of causal connection: There is probably Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
    no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
  3. Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
    p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.




Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."


# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([20.1,21.6,23.2,25.4,27.6,29,28.5,27.6,28.3,28.7,30.4,31.6,33.6,35.9,38.5,40.6,42.3,43.7,45.2,47,46.5,])
array_2 = np.array([40.11,42.95,43.06,43.76,46.43,48.12,48.67,39,45.73,49.76,62.1,56.2,55.15,66.1,63.85,73.72,84.75,76.32,90.55,72.27,85.35,])
array_1_name = "US per-person consumption of bottled water"
array_2_name = "Consolidated Edison's stock price (ED)"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)



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For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

When spoken, my last name is pronounced "vegan," like I don't eat meat.

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Correlation ID: 3758 · Black Variable ID: 442 · Red Variable ID: 1828
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