Spurious correlation #1,527 · View random
A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is The distance between Mars and Earth and the second variable is The number of bailiffs in New Jersey. The chart goes from 2003 to 2020, and the two variables track closely in value over that time.

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is The distance between Mars and Earth and the second variable is The number of bailiffs in New Jersey. The chart goes from 2003 to 2020, and the two variables track closely in value over that time.

Download png, svg

AI explanation

As the red planet recedes, it sends out cosmic vibes that resonate with the concept of justice. This interplanetary dance prompts a surge in interest in law and order, leading to a sudden demand for bailiffs in the Garden State. It's a celestial case of 'Mars'hal law' in the courtrooms!

^{Show image generation prompt} Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Generate an image of a futuristic New Jersey courthouse with bailiffs standing at the entrance, silhouetted against a backdrop of the night sky. In the sky, Mars is visible, appearing as a bright red dot while the stars twinkle in the distance. The courthouse and its surroundings should have a sleek, modern design to reflect a futuristic aesthetic. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.

This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: The distance between Mars and Earth and The number of bailiffs in New Jersey. Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: Realistic Pop art Data cyber art Steampunk Futuristic
ChatGPT: Futuristic

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both The distance between Mars and Earth and The number of bailiffs in New Jersey together. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: In the vast expanse of space, Mars is at its closest point to Earth, appearing as a bright red dot in the night sky. Meanwhile, in a New Jersey courthouse, a few bailiffs stand near the entrance, ready to maintain order during legal proceedings.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ Futuristic ] and depicting this scene: In the vast expanse of space, Mars is at its closest point to Earth, appearing as a bright red dot in the night sky. Meanwhile, in a New Jersey courthouse, a few bailiffs stand near the entrance, ready to maintain order during legal proceedings. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Generate an image of a futuristic New Jersey courthouse with bailiffs standing at the entrance, silhouetted against a backdrop of the night sky. In the sky, Mars is visible, appearing as a bright red dot while the stars twinkle in the distance. The courthouse and its surroundings should have a sleek, modern design to reflect a futuristic aesthetic.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.
^{Show prompt for explanation} Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how increases in The distance between Mars and Earth positively influenced The number of bailiffs in New Jersey.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.05)

Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey

The Journal of Extraterrestrial Governance and Earthly Anomalies

Jan 2024

Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real!

^{Show prompt used to generate this paper} Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Mars and Earth and The number of bailiffs in New Jersey. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then name some cartoons and childrens' shows that you watched that are related to the topic.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey"

[[ABSTRACT]]
Our research delves into the fascinating, and perhaps otherworldly, connection between the astronomical distance separating Mars and Earth and the curious correlation with the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey. By utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we analyzed trends from 2003 to 2020, uncovering a correlation coefficient of 0.5338011 and a statistically significant p-value of less than 0.05.

Despite the light-years between them, we observed a surprising link between the two variables, prompting an astronomical question: "What's the planet's role in New Jersey law enforcement? It must be out of this world!" Our findings suggest that as the celestial gap between Mars and Earth fluctuates, so does the number of bailiffs in the Garden State. As we embarked on this research, we couldn't help but think, "What do you call a Martian who works as a bailiff in New Jersey? A 'bail-ien'!"

Our study not only sheds light on this enigmatic correlation but also sets the stage for further investigation into the cosmic influences on earthly matters. With these cosmic implications, our research pokes fun at traditional causality and calls for a celestial reexamination of earthly phenomena.

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
The role of celestial bodies in shaping terrestrial phenomena has long intrigued both scientific minds and lovers of cosmic coincidence. While countless studies have explored the impact of solar flares on radio communication or the lunar cycle on human behavior, our research takes a step into uncharted territory by probing the correlation between the distance separating Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey.
As we pondered the hypothesis of such a connection, one couldn't help but crack a joke: "What do you call a space alien who brings order to a New Jersey courtroom? A 'law-and-order-gonian'!"
This study not only seeks to unravel this seemingly preposterous linkage but also aims to transcend conventional notions of causality. Utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we embarked on an investigation that would raise eyebrows and prompt a cosmic query: "What's the astronomical association with New Jersey's legal system? It must be a 'Mars-velous' mystery!"
While the topic might seem lightyears away from traditional research endeavors, we approached it with the rigor and skepticism befitting any scientific inquiry. However, we couldn't resist the urge to interject a bit of levity into our findings, prompting a ponderous pun: "What do you get when you cross Mars and a courtroom officer? A 'bail-ien'—half Martian, half bailiff, and all cosmic comedy!"
In this paper, we present our findings, not only to shed light on this celestial charm but also to challenge the boundaries of causal conceptions. As we launch into this exploration, we invite our readers to join us in this cosmic misadventure, where the laws of physics intersect with the laws of the land.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

The investigation into celestial bodies' influence on earthly affairs has garnered increasing interest among researchers in recent years. A seminal study by Smith et al. (2010) delves into the effects of lunar phases on human behavior, while Doe and Jones (2015) explore the impact of solar flares on technological disruptions. However, our research delves deeper into the cosmos by examining the peculiar relationship between the distance separating Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in New Jersey. As we venture into the uncharted territory of interplanetary influences on terrestrial matters, we aim to both inform and entertain our readers, just like a good dad joke.

In "Mars Matters: A Celestial Analysis of Terrestrial Trends," the authors uncover correlations between astronomical phenomena and earthly occurrences, laying the groundwork for our own investigation into planetary proximity and legal personnel in New Jersey. Meanwhile, "Interstellar Insights: Exploring the Cosmic Connection to Courtroom Control" by Johnson and Smith (2018) provocatively examines extraterrestrial influences on judicial processes, setting the stage for our cosmic foray into the connection between Mars and New Jersey bailiffs. Despite the initial skepticism in the scientific community, our research aims to take this celestial-cum-terrestrial correlation seriously, although we can't resist throwing in the occasional pun or two.

While the literature on celestial influences encompasses a wide range of serious studies, we also draw inspiration from popular non-fiction works that explore the mysteries of the cosmos. Books like "The Martian" by Andy Weir and "Red Mars" by Kim Stanley Robinson not only fuel our fascination with the Red Planet but also provide a lighthearted view of extraterrestrial connections to earthly affairs. These books serve as a reminder that, even in the face of cosmic inquiry, a good dad joke is never too far out of reach.

Drawing from fiction that touches on the extraterrestrial and legal spheres, works like "The Sirens of Titan" by Kurt Vonnegut and "Stranger in a Strange Land" by Robert A. Heinlein prompt us to consider the interplay between celestial bodies and earthly institutions with a dash of literary imagination. As we navigate the intersection of the celestial and the bureaucratic, we can't help but be reminded that a good pun is like a free gift from the universe.

Adding a touch of nostalgia into the mix, we harken back to childhood cartoons and television shows that have depicted the cosmic and the legal, such as "The Jetsons" and "Judge Judy." While these may seem tangential to our research, they serve as delightful reminders that even the most serious of topics can benefit from a bit of levity and a well-timed dad joke. So, as we continue our scholarly investigation into the celestial influences on New Jersey's legal system, let's not forget to take a moment to appreciate the cosmic comedy that accompanies our cosmic inquiry.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Mars and Earth and The number of bailiffs in New Jersey. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Caclculated using Astropy and Bureau of Larbor Statistics . You used data from 2003 to 2020

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey"

[[ABSTRACT]]
Our research delves into the fascinating, and perhaps otherworldly, connection between the astronomical distance separating Mars and Earth and the curious correlation with the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey. By utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we analyzed trends from 2003 to 2020, uncovering a correlation coefficient of 0.5338011 and a statistically significant p-value of less than 0.05.

Despite the light-years between them, we observed a surprising link between the two variables, prompting an astronomical question: "What's the planet's role in New Jersey law enforcement? It must be out of this world!" Our findings suggest that as the celestial gap between Mars and Earth fluctuates, so does the number of bailiffs in the Garden State. As we embarked on this research, we couldn't help but think, "What do you call a Martian who works as a bailiff in New Jersey? A 'bail-ien'!"

Our study not only sheds light on this enigmatic correlation but also sets the stage for further investigation into the cosmic influences on earthly matters. With these cosmic implications, our research pokes fun at traditional causality and calls for a celestial reexamination of earthly phenomena.

[[INTRODUCTION]]
The role of celestial bodies in shaping terrestrial phenomena has long intrigued both scientific minds and lovers of cosmic coincidence. While countless studies have explored the impact of solar flares on radio communication or the lunar cycle on human behavior, our research takes a step into uncharted territory by probing the correlation between the distance separating Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey.
As we pondered the hypothesis of such a connection, one couldn't help but crack a joke: "What do you call a space alien who brings order to a New Jersey courtroom? A 'law-and-order-gonian'!"
This study not only seeks to unravel this seemingly preposterous linkage but also aims to transcend conventional notions of causality. Utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we embarked on an investigation that would raise eyebrows and prompt a cosmic query: "What's the astronomical association with New Jersey's legal system? It must be a 'Mars-velous' mystery!"
While the topic might seem lightyears away from traditional research endeavors, we approached it with the rigor and skepticism befitting any scientific inquiry. However, we couldn't resist the urge to interject a bit of levity into our findings, prompting a ponderous pun: "What do you get when you cross Mars and a courtroom officer? A 'bail-ien'—half Martian, half bailiff, and all cosmic comedy!"
In this paper, we present our findings, not only to shed light on this celestial charm but also to challenge the boundaries of causal conceptions. As we launch into this exploration, we invite our readers to join us in this cosmic misadventure, where the laws of physics intersect with the laws of the land.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

ChatGPT:

**[[METHODOLOGY]]**

In this otherworldly investigation, we adopted a methodological approach that incorporated both astronomical and socio-political analyses to untangle the celestial and legal intricacies at play. Our research team began by collecting data on the distance between Mars and Earth, as well as the number of bailiffs in New Jersey, from 2003 to 2020. We obtained astronomical data from Astropy, a robust Python library for astronomy, and labor statistics from the Bureau of Labor Statistics. Our team also threw in a dash of intergalactic imagination and a sprinkle of cosmic curiosity, just to keep things interesting.

Once we'd assembled our celestial and legal datasets, we hunkered down to conduct a thorough examination. Our research team first tested for normality and sphericity in the data, hoping that the statistical gods would smile upon our interplanetary inquiries. To account for any non-normal or non-spherical data, we opted for non-parametric tests, flying in the face of convention like a rogue asteroid hurtling through the cosmos. This unconventional approach allowed us to uncover any hidden patterns that might defy the gravitational pull of traditional statistical methods.

With our orbital data and legal counts in hand, we calculated the Pearson correlation coefficient to probe the potential relationship between the astronomical distance and the bureaucratic headcount. Our statistical analysis aimed to unveil a connection that's as surprising as finding a moon rock in your backyard. As we delved into our calculations, we couldn't help but quip, "Why did the Martian break up with his girlfriend? Because he found out she was just too 'inter-galactically' away!"

Furthermore, we conducted a regression analysis to ascertain the magnitude of the relationship between the variables. This process involved fitting a celestial model to our legal data, mapping out the cosmic influence on the earthly role of bailiffs in New Jersey. Our team went where no researchers had gone before, navigating through the stellar and the mundane with a blend of fascination and a touch of cosmic jest. We even considered adding a new variable to our model: the "Martian Municipality Index," but decided against it, as the statistical software we were using wasn't designed to handle datasets from extraterrestrial jurisdictions - it's a bit "UFO-ver our heads," you might say!

Ultimately, our methodology combined robust statistical analyses with a sprinkle of cosmic curiosity, resulting in an approach as intriguing as uncovering a message from aliens in a crop circle. This unconventional approach not only yielded insightful findings but also led us to ask, "What's the astronomical origin story behind New Jersey's bailiffs? It must be a 'stellar-studded' saga!"

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Mars and Earth and The number of bailiffs in New Jersey. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
"Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey"

[[ABSTRACT]]
Our research delves into the fascinating, and perhaps otherworldly, connection between the astronomical distance separating Mars and Earth and the curious correlation with the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey. By utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we analyzed trends from 2003 to 2020, uncovering a correlation coefficient of 0.5338011 and a statistically significant p-value of less than 0.05.

Despite the light-years between them, we observed a surprising link between the two variables, prompting an astronomical question: "What's the planet's role in New Jersey law enforcement? It must be out of this world!" Our findings suggest that as the celestial gap between Mars and Earth fluctuates, so does the number of bailiffs in the Garden State. As we embarked on this research, we couldn't help but think, "What do you call a Martian who works as a bailiff in New Jersey? A 'bail-ien'!"

Our study not only sheds light on this enigmatic correlation but also sets the stage for further investigation into the cosmic influences on earthly matters. With these cosmic implications, our research pokes fun at traditional causality and calls for a celestial reexamination of earthly phenomena.

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
The investigation into celestial bodies' influence on earthly affairs has garnered increasing interest among researchers in recent years. A seminal study by Smith et al. (2010) delves into the effects of lunar phases on human behavior, while Doe and Jones (2015) explore the impact of solar flares on technological disruptions. However, our research delves deeper into the cosmos by examining the peculiar relationship between the distance separating Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in New Jersey. As we venture into the uncharted territory of interplanetary influences on terrestrial matters, we aim to both inform and entertain our readers, just like a good dad joke.
In "Mars Matters: A Celestial Analysis of Terrestrial Trends," the authors uncover correlations between astronomical phenomena and earthly occurrences, laying the groundwork for our own investigation into planetary proximity and legal personnel in New Jersey. Meanwhile, "Interstellar Insights: Exploring the Cosmic Connection to Courtroom Control" by Johnson and Smith (2018) provocatively examines extraterrestrial influences on judicial processes, setting the stage for our cosmic foray into the connection between Mars and New Jersey bailiffs. Despite the initial skepticism in the scientific community, our research aims to take this celestial-cum-terrestrial correlation seriously, although we can't resist throwing in the occasional pun or two.
While the literature on celestial influences encompasses a wide range of serious studies, we also draw inspiration from popular non-fiction works that explore the mysteries of the cosmos. Books like "The Martian" by Andy Weir and "Red Mars" by Kim Stanley Robinson not only fuel our fascination with the Red Planet but also provide a lighthearted view of extraterrestrial connections to earthly affairs. These books serve as a reminder that, even in the face of cosmic inquiry, a good dad joke is never too far out of reach.
Drawing from fiction that touches on the extraterrestrial and legal spheres, works like "The Sirens of Titan" by Kurt Vonnegut and "Stranger in a Strange Land" by Robert A. Heinlein prompt us to consider the interplay between celestial bodies and earthly institutions with a dash of literary imagination. As we navigate the intersection of the celestial and the bureaucratic, we can't help but be reminded that a good pun is like a free gift from the universe.
Adding a touch of nostalgia into the mix, we harken back to childhood cartoons and television shows that have depicted the cosmic and the legal, such as "The Jetsons" and "Judge Judy." While these may seem tangential to our research, they serve as delightful reminders that even the most serious of topics can benefit from a bit of levity and a well-timed dad joke. So, as we continue our scholarly investigation into the celestial influences on New Jersey's legal system, let's not forget to take a moment to appreciate the cosmic comedy that accompanies our cosmic inquiry.

[[RESULTS]]
Our investigation into the relationship between the distance from Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey yielded intriguing results. Utilizing data from 2003 to 2020, we observed a correlation coefficient of 0.5338011, indicating a moderate positive relationship between the two variables. This discovery might leave one pondering, "What do you call a Martian who collects overdue payments? A 'loan-and-mortgage-gonian'!"
Furthermore, the r-squared value of 0.2849436 suggests that approximately 28.5% of the variability in the number of bailiffs in New Jersey can be explained by changes in the distance between Mars and Earth. This finding adds a celestial twist to the state's legal landscape, raising the question, "Why do Martians make good bailiffs? Because they're out of this world!"
The statistical significance of the correlation, with a p-value of less than 0.05, underscores the reliability of our findings. This peculiarity demands further investigation and enlightens us with a cosmic conundrum: "Why don't aliens get parking tickets? Because they can always find 'space' to park!"
Finally, Fig. 1 illustrates the strong correlation between the distance from Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in New Jersey, visually emphasizing the unearthly connection we uncovered. This visual representation highlights the tantalizing cosmic causality underlying what might at first seem like an implausible association. While we navigate through this celestial conundrum, we can't help but entertain the extraterrestrial wordplay, leaving us with the thought, "For a Martian, working as a bailiff is the 'Mars'icious duty in the universe!"

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]

ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

The results of our study provide persuasive evidence supporting the existence of a significant correlation between the distance from Mars to Earth and the number of bailiffs in New Jersey. This unearthly connection, with its statistical significance and moderate positive relationship, prompts us to rethink the cosmic implications on earthly matters. One might even say it's a "gavel-ing" discovery!

Our findings align with previous research that has explored the influence of celestial bodies on terrestrial affairs, such as the work by Smith et al. (2010) and Johnson and Smith (2018). While our investigation might initially seem light-years away from conventional studies on cosmic influences, these prior works have paved the way for our exploration into the connection between planetary proximity and legal personnel. We are thus led to seriously consider these celestial-cum-terrestrial correlations, even in the presence of intergalactic humor.

The substantial r-squared value, signifying that over a quarter of the variability in the number of bailiffs in New Jersey can be attributed to changes in the distance between Mars and Earth, underscores the gravity of our findings. This finding may prompt one to ponder: "What did the Martian say to the judge in New Jersey? 'Take me to your bailiff!'"

Furthermore, the visually compelling confirmation of this unearthly connection in Fig. 1 highlights the genuine cosmic conundrum we've unearthed. This graphical representation not only reinforces the statistical significance of our findings but also emphasizes the unexpected celestial twist in New Jersey's legal landscape. It's almost as if the universe is trying to tell us, "Why don't aliens sue each other? It's always a 'close encounter' without lawyers!"

As we process the implications of this study, it is crucial to recognize the potential interdisciplinary implications of our findings. The intersection of astrophysics and law enforcement may seem peculiar, but the undeniable correlations urge further exploration. Just like a good dad joke, these celestial connections add a humorous and thought-provoking dimension to our understanding of seemingly unrelated phenomena. After all, who would've thought that a Martian's presence could influence courtroom dynamics in the Garden State?

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Mars and Earth and The number of bailiffs in New Jersey. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
"Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey"

[[ABSTRACT]]
Our research delves into the fascinating, and perhaps otherworldly, connection between the astronomical distance separating Mars and Earth and the curious correlation with the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey. By utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we analyzed trends from 2003 to 2020, uncovering a correlation coefficient of 0.5338011 and a statistically significant p-value of less than 0.05.

Despite the light-years between them, we observed a surprising link between the two variables, prompting an astronomical question: "What's the planet's role in New Jersey law enforcement? It must be out of this world!" Our findings suggest that as the celestial gap between Mars and Earth fluctuates, so does the number of bailiffs in the Garden State. As we embarked on this research, we couldn't help but think, "What do you call a Martian who works as a bailiff in New Jersey? A 'bail-ien'!"

Our study not only sheds light on this enigmatic correlation but also sets the stage for further investigation into the cosmic influences on earthly matters. With these cosmic implications, our research pokes fun at traditional causality and calls for a celestial reexamination of earthly phenomena.

[[INTRDUCTION]]
The role of celestial bodies in shaping terrestrial phenomena has long intrigued both scientific minds and lovers of cosmic coincidence. While countless studies have explored the impact of solar flares on radio communication or the lunar cycle on human behavior, our research takes a step into uncharted territory by probing the correlation between the distance separating Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey.
As we pondered the hypothesis of such a connection, one couldn't help but crack a joke: "What do you call a space alien who brings order to a New Jersey courtroom? A 'law-and-order-gonian'!"
This study not only seeks to unravel this seemingly preposterous linkage but also aims to transcend conventional notions of causality. Utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we embarked on an investigation that would raise eyebrows and prompt a cosmic query: "What's the astronomical association with New Jersey's legal system? It must be a 'Mars-velous' mystery!"
While the topic might seem lightyears away from traditional research endeavors, we approached it with the rigor and skepticism befitting any scientific inquiry. However, we couldn't resist the urge to interject a bit of levity into our findings, prompting a ponderous pun: "What do you get when you cross Mars and a courtroom officer? A 'bail-ien'—half Martian, half bailiff, and all cosmic comedy!"
In this paper, we present our findings, not only to shed light on this celestial charm but also to challenge the boundaries of causal conceptions. As we launch into this exploration, we invite our readers to join us in this cosmic misadventure, where the laws of physics intersect with the laws of the land.

[[RESULTS]]
Our investigation into the relationship between the distance from Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey yielded intriguing results. Utilizing data from 2003 to 2020, we observed a correlation coefficient of 0.5338011, indicating a moderate positive relationship between the two variables. This discovery might leave one pondering, "What do you call a Martian who collects overdue payments? A 'loan-and-mortgage-gonian'!"
Furthermore, the r-squared value of 0.2849436 suggests that approximately 28.5% of the variability in the number of bailiffs in New Jersey can be explained by changes in the distance between Mars and Earth. This finding adds a celestial twist to the state's legal landscape, raising the question, "Why do Martians make good bailiffs? Because they're out of this world!"
The statistical significance of the correlation, with a p-value of less than 0.05, underscores the reliability of our findings. This peculiarity demands further investigation and enlightens us with a cosmic conundrum: "Why don't aliens get parking tickets? Because they can always find 'space' to park!"
Finally, Fig. 1 illustrates the strong correlation between the distance from Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in New Jersey, visually emphasizing the unearthly connection we uncovered. This visual representation highlights the tantalizing cosmic causality underlying what might at first seem like an implausible association. While we navigate through this celestial conundrum, we can't help but entertain the extraterrestrial wordplay, leaving us with the thought, "For a Martian, working as a bailiff is the 'Mars'icious duty in the universe!"

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]

ChatGPT:

[[CONCLUSION]]

In conclusion, our investigation has brought to light a peculiar and unexpected relationship between the distance from Mars and Earth and the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey. The moderate positive correlation coefficient of 0.5338011 and the statistically significant p-value of less than 0.05 indicate a compelling link, providing new cosmic context to the Garden State's legal system.

As we unravel this cosmic mystery, one can't help but quip, "Why did the Martian apply to be a bailiff in New Jersey? Because he wanted to work for the 'court' of the universe!"

The visual representation in Fig. 1 serves as a compelling visual testament to this unearthly connection, prompting one to ponder, "What did the Martian say to the judge in New Jersey? 'Take me to your courthouse!'"

These findings not only provoke cosmic curiosity but also defy conventional causality, opening a celestial Pandora's box of questions. It's as if the laws of physics and the laws of the land are engaged in a celestial dance, leaving us with the thought, "For aliens, working in law enforcement is a truly 'out-of-this-world' experience!"

In light of these revelatory findings, we assert that no further research is needed in this area. After all, when it comes to the cosmic influence on New Jersey's legal matters, we've said it once, and we'll say it again: "The verdict is in—this correlation is truly 'astronomical'!"

So, let's close the file on this celestial case and leave it up there with the stars. After all, "Why did the astronomer become a bailiff? Because he wanted to bring 'cosmic order' to the court!"

No more research is needed in this area, as we've already reached "Mars-velous" conclusions!

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

The Journal of Extraterrestrial Governance and Earthly Anomalies

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

The Interstellar Society for Extraterrestrial Sociology and Terrestrial Law Enforcement Studies

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey with an abstract of Our research delves into the fascinating, and perhaps otherworldly, connection between the astronomical distance separating Mars and Earth and the curious correlation with the number of bailiffs in the state of New Jersey. By utilizing data from Astropy and the Bureau of Labor Statistics, we analyzed trends from 2003 to 2020, uncovering a correlation coefficient of 0.5338011 and a statistically significant p-value of less than 0.05.
Despite the light-years between them, we observed a surprising link between the two variables, prompting an astronomical question: "What's the planet's role in New Jersey law enforcement? It must be out of this world!" Our findings suggest that as the celestial gap between Mars and Earth fluctuates, so does the number of bailiffs in the Garden State. As we embarked on this research, we couldn't help but think, "What do you call a Martian who works as a bailiff in New Jersey? A 'bail-ien'!"
Our study not only sheds light on this enigmatic correlation but also sets the stage for further investigation into the cosmic influences on earthly matters. With these cosmic implications, our research pokes fun at traditional causality and calls for a celestial reexamination of earthly phenomena.

ChatGPT:

distance from Mars and Earth, correlation, Astropy, Bureau of Labor Statistics, bailiffs in New Jersey, celestial influences, planetary proximity, New Jersey law enforcement, cosmic implications

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.

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Data details

The distance between Mars and Earth
Detailed data title: The average distance between Mars and Earth as measured on the first day of each month
Source: Caclculated using Astropy
Additional Info: ^{See full details} I wrote a Python script using Astropy to calculate the distance between the named planets on the first day of each month for every year.

See what else correlates with The distance between Mars and Earth

The number of bailiffs in New Jersey
Detailed data title: BLS estimate of bailiffs in New Jersey
Source: Bureau of Larbor Statistics
See what else correlates with The number of bailiffs in New Jersey

Correlation r = 0.5338011 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r² = 0.2849436 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 28.5% of the change in the one variable (i.e., The number of bailiffs in New Jersey) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., The distance between Mars and Earth) over the 18 years from 2003 through 2020.

p < 0.05, which statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 0.023.^Show 0.0225094327172487740000000000
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme.^Note More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.53 in 2.3% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 44 random variables^Note Which I absolutely did.
with the same 17 degrees of freedom, ^Note Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 17 because we have two variables measured over a period of 18 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.09, 0.8 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
^{Read more about the confidence interval} The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!

All values for the years included above: ^Note If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.

	2003	2004	2005	2006	2007	2008	2009	2010	2011	2012	2013	2014	2015	2016	2017	2018	2019	2020
The distance between Mars and Earth (Planetary distance (AU))	0.969408	2.1744	1.19317	2.00287	1.52773	1.79685	1.84352	1.57762	2.09436	1.36495	2.25467	1.15882	2.32654	0.996145	2.31382	0.938608	2.22494	1.08496
The number of bailiffs in New Jersey (Bailiffs)	90	120	90	90	80	100	90	100	90	90	110	110	100	70	90	80	100	80

Why this works

Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
Lack of causal connection: There is probably^Note Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple^Note Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.

Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. ^{Show the steps to do this.} Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."

# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([0.969408,2.1744,1.19317,2.00287,1.52773,1.79685,1.84352,1.57762,2.09436,1.36495,2.25467,1.15882,2.32654,0.996145,2.31382,0.938608,2.22494,1.08496,])
array_2 = np.array([90,120,90,90,80,100,90,100,90,90,110,110,100,70,90,80,100,80,])
array_1_name = "The distance between Mars and Earth"
array_2_name = "The number of bailiffs in New Jersey"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)

Reuseable content

You may re-use the images on this page for any purpose, even commercial purposes, without asking for permission. The only requirement is that you attribute Tyler Vigen. ^Note Attribution can take many different forms. If you leave the "tylervigen.com" link in the image, that satisfies it just fine. If you remove it and move it to a footnote, that's fine too. You can also just write "Charts courtesy of Tyler Vigen" at the bottom of an article.

You do not need to attribute "the spurious correlations website," and you don't even need to link here if you don't want to. I don't gain anything from pageviews. There are no ads on this site, there is nothing for sale, and I am not for hire.

For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

When spoken, my last name is pronounced "vegan," like I don't eat meat.

Full license details.
For more on re-use permissions, or to get a signed release form, see tylervigen.com/permission.

Download images for these variables:

High resolution line chart ^Note The image linked here is a Scalable Vector Graphic (SVG). It is the highest resolution that is possible to achieve. It scales up beyond the size of the observable universe without pixelating. You do not need to email me asking if I have a higher resolution image. I do not. The physical limitations of our universe prevent me from providing you with an image that is any higher resolution than this one.

If you insert it into a PowerPoint presentation (a tool well-known for managing things that are the scale of the universe), you can right-click > "Ungroup" or "Create Shape" and then edit the lines and text directly. You can also change the colors this way.

Alternatively you can use a tool like Inkscape.
High resolution line chart, optimized for mobile
Alternative high resolution line chart
Scatterplot
Portable line chart (png)
Portable line chart (png), optimized for mobile
Line chart for only The distance between Mars and Earth
Line chart for only The number of bailiffs in New Jersey
AI-generated correlation image
The spurious research paper: Planetary Proximity and Peculiar Policies: An Unearthly Investigation into the Relationship Between the Distance from Mars and Earth and the Number of Bailiffs in New Jersey

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Correlation ID: 1527 · Black Variable ID: 1938 · Red Variable ID: 11629


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