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Spurious correlation #1,435 · View random

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and the second variable is Professor salaries in the US.  The chart goes from 2009 to 2021, and the two variables track closely in value over that time. Small Image
Download png
, svg

AI explanation

As the gravitational pull weakened, it became easier for professors to demand higher pay without feeling financially stretched. After all, in the world of academia, it's all about that astronomical compensation!

Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Create an image of a serene galactic view with Jupiter prominently featured in the background, radiating with vibrant hues of red and orange, surrounded by sparkling stars. In the foreground, a modest university office is depicted, with a contemplative professor reviewing their paycheck at a desk bathed in warm, natural light. The scene should evoke a sense of juxtaposition between the vastness of space and the tangible concerns of everyday life. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.
This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: Macabre inspired by bauhaus Surrealism Scalar art Cutsy graphics
ChatGPT: Scalar art

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US together. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: In the vast expanse of space, the giant planet Jupiter orbits the Sun at a distance of 484 million miles. Meanwhile, in a university office on Earth, a professor carefully reviews their paycheck, reflecting the average annual salary for professors in the US.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ Scalar art ] and depicting this scene: In the vast expanse of space, the giant planet Jupiter orbits the Sun at a distance of 484 million miles. Meanwhile, in a university office on Earth, a professor carefully reviews their paycheck, reflecting the average annual salary for professors in the US. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Create an image of a serene galactic view with Jupiter prominently featured in the background, radiating with vibrant hues of red and orange, surrounded by sparkling stars. In the foreground, a modest university office is depicted, with a contemplative professor reviewing their paycheck at a desk bathed in warm, natural light. The scene should evoke a sense of juxtaposition between the vastness of space and the tangible concerns of everyday life.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how increases in The distance between Jupiter and the Sun positively influenced Professor salaries in the US. Add a funny one-liner at the end.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.01)
Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US

Astronomical Economics Quarterly

Jan 2024

Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real!
Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.




Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You write titles and abstracts of goofy academic research papers.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, and add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please draft the title and abstract of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Make the title seem clever.

Your research team used data from Caclculated using Astropy and National Center for Education Statistics to assess this nagging question. You found a correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and p < 0.01 for 2009 to 2021.

Please respond in this format (replace "Lorem ipsum dolor sit" with your title and abstract)

[[TITLE]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit

[[ABSTRACT]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit



ChatGPT:
[[TITLE]]
"Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.

Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the introduction section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the introduction section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.

Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[INTRODUCTION]]



ChatGPT:
[[INTRODUCTION]]

As the saying goes, "When Jupiter aligns with Mars, peace will guide the planets, and salary negotiations will reach for the stars." Perhaps that's not the most scientifically accurate aphorism, but it certainly captures the spirit of our investigation into the intriguing connection between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US.

While it may sound like a cosmic coincidence or a plotline fit for a science fiction novel, our study takes a lighthearted approach to uncovering any statistical gravitational pull between these seemingly disparate variables. After all, in the world of research, there's always the gravitational risk of reaching for correlations that are lightyears away from any logical explanation.

With the assistance of Astropy's astronomical calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team of intrepid explorers set out on a celestial quest to unearth any astronomical influences on the earthly realm of academia. Armed with a telescope for stargazing and a robust statistical analysis toolkit, we embarked on a voyage that would make Galileo and Gauss proud.

In this paper, we present the celestial symphony of data and statistical analyses that have led us to unveil a fascinating correlation between the distance from our gas giant neighbor, Jupiter, to the radiant Sun and the compensation awarded to the erudite denizens of academia. As we navigate through the cosmos of statistical significance, we invite you to join us on an expedition that may leave you pondering the cosmic forces at play in the domain of professorial finances.

So, buckle up and set your sextant to statistical stardom as we delve into the planetary impact on professor salaries in the US, where the statistical stars align in ways that will leave you orbiting the realm of celestial curiosity.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then name a few real TV shows that sound like they might be relevant to the topic that you watched as research.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.

Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
As the saying goes, "When Jupiter aligns with Mars, peace will guide the planets, and salary negotiations will reach for the stars." Perhaps that's not the most scientifically accurate aphorism, but it certainly captures the spirit of our investigation into the intriguing connection between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US.
While it may sound like a cosmic coincidence or a plotline fit for a science fiction novel, our study takes a lighthearted approach to uncovering any statistical gravitational pull between these seemingly disparate variables. After all, in the world of research, there's always the gravitational risk of reaching for correlations that are lightyears away from any logical explanation.
With the assistance of Astropy's astronomical calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team of intrepid explorers set out on a celestial quest to unearth any astronomical influences on the earthly realm of academia. Armed with a telescope for stargazing and a robust statistical analysis toolkit, we embarked on a voyage that would make Galileo and Gauss proud.
In this paper, we present the celestial symphony of data and statistical analyses that have led us to unveil a fascinating correlation between the distance from our gas giant neighbor, Jupiter, to the radiant Sun and the compensation awarded to the erudite denizens of academia. As we navigate through the cosmos of statistical significance, we invite you to join us on an expedition that may leave you pondering the cosmic forces at play in the domain of professorial finances.
So, buckle up and set your sextant to statistical stardom as we delve into the planetary impact on professor salaries in the US, where the statistical stars align in ways that will leave you orbiting the realm of celestial curiosity.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]



ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

To our knowledge, no previous studies have directly explored the potential correlation between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries in the US. In "Celestial Bodies and Economic Anomalies," Smith and Doe discuss the impact of astronomical phenomena on economic trends, but the specific influence of Jupiter's orbit on academia remains uncharted territory.

However, as we venture into the astral unknown, it's crucial to consider literature that touches upon related themes. In "The Economics of the Solar System," Jones et al. muse on the interplanetary dynamics that may shape earthly financial systems, offering a theoretical foundation for our celestial investigation.

Delving into a more speculative realm, "Jupiter: A Cosmic Payroll?" introduces the notion of celestial bodies affecting earthly compensation, albeit within the context of a science fiction narrative. This work, while not grounded in empirical evidence, sparks the imagination and inspires us to explore the cosmic possibilities of our research question.

In our quest for interdisciplinary insights, we turned to television for a glimpse of fictional portrayals that might shed light on the intertwining of planetary movements and economic realms. "The Big Bang Theory" and "Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey" both offered glimpses into the cosmic mysteries, although their relevance to our specific inquiry may be light-years away.

Overall, the literature provides a blend of theoretical musings, fictional speculations, and popular portrayals of cosmic phenomena, serving as both an intellectual compass and a whimsical diversion in guiding our research into the uncharted cosmos of professor salaries and planetary perturbations.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Caclculated using Astropy and National Center for Education Statistics . You used data from 2009 to 2021

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.

Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.

[[INTRODUCTION]]
As the saying goes, "When Jupiter aligns with Mars, peace will guide the planets, and salary negotiations will reach for the stars." Perhaps that's not the most scientifically accurate aphorism, but it certainly captures the spirit of our investigation into the intriguing connection between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US.
While it may sound like a cosmic coincidence or a plotline fit for a science fiction novel, our study takes a lighthearted approach to uncovering any statistical gravitational pull between these seemingly disparate variables. After all, in the world of research, there's always the gravitational risk of reaching for correlations that are lightyears away from any logical explanation.
With the assistance of Astropy's astronomical calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team of intrepid explorers set out on a celestial quest to unearth any astronomical influences on the earthly realm of academia. Armed with a telescope for stargazing and a robust statistical analysis toolkit, we embarked on a voyage that would make Galileo and Gauss proud.
In this paper, we present the celestial symphony of data and statistical analyses that have led us to unveil a fascinating correlation between the distance from our gas giant neighbor, Jupiter, to the radiant Sun and the compensation awarded to the erudite denizens of academia. As we navigate through the cosmos of statistical significance, we invite you to join us on an expedition that may leave you pondering the cosmic forces at play in the domain of professorial finances.
So, buckle up and set your sextant to statistical stardom as we delve into the planetary impact on professor salaries in the US, where the statistical stars align in ways that will leave you orbiting the realm of celestial curiosity.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]



ChatGPT:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

To unravel the mysterious dance between the astronomical and the academical, our research team employed a unique blend of celestial observation and statistical inquiry. The methodology can be best described as a fusion of astrological intrigue and empirical rigor, an approach reminiscent of cosmic cocktails mixed with meticulous measurements.

Firstly, the distance from Jupiter to the Sun was determined using precise astronomical calculations extracted from the Astropy library, which provided us with the celestial coordinates necessary for understanding this extraterrestrial variable. The use of such cutting-edge astronomical data not only added a touch of celestial flair to our study but also ensured the accuracy of our cosmic metric.

In parallel, the salaries of professors in the US were meticulously sourced from the National Center for Education Statistics, capturing the earthly dimension of our investigation. By marshaling these two diverse datasets into our research orbit, we endeavored to uncover any semblance of correlation between the celestial and the pecuniary.

With data spanning the years 2009 to 2021, our intrepid statistical explorers embarked on the cosmic odyssey of data cleaning and preparation. Akin to mapping nebulae in the statistical galaxy, this entailed systematic scrutinization of the gathered data, clearing out celestial interference and earthly outliers that could disrupt our voyage toward the truth.

Harnessing the power of statistical software akin to celestial navigational aids, our team carefully calculated correlation coefficients and performed regression analyses to decipher the hidden patterns within the data. A sprinkle of multivariate techniques was added to discern any lurking confounding variables that might cloud our celestial-salary conjunction.

Furthermore, to fortify the statistical robustness of our findings, bootstrapping and Monte Carlo simulations were conducted to navigate the uncertainty within these cosmic juxtapositions. This ensured that even in the celestial chaos, our conclusions remained grounded in statistical significance.

Moreover, to address the cosmic confounders that might tiptoe across the path of correlation, sensitivity analyses were performed, akin to adjusting the lenses of a telescope to sharpen the celestial focus.

Lastly, to maintain scientific transparency and to allow fellow scholars to traverse this cosmic odyssey with us, all procedures, scripts, and statistical analyses were documented with rigorous detail, ensuring that our methods did not veer into the statistical equivalent of uncharted planetary territories.

In summary, our methodology transcended the cosmo-academic divide, straddling the celestial and the terrestrial with a blend of statistical perspicacity and astronomical allure. This methodological melange provided the necessary framework for uncovering the celestial symphony behind the salaries of professors in the US, a cosmic revelation that left us all starry-eyed at the cosmic implications for scholarly compensation.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Caclculated using Astropy and National Center for Education Statistics .

For the time period 2009 to 2021, you found a correlation 0.8254652, r-squared of 0.6813927, and p < 0.01.

One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.

Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.

-------

And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
As the saying goes, "When Jupiter aligns with Mars, peace will guide the planets, and salary negotiations will reach for the stars." Perhaps that's not the most scientifically accurate aphorism, but it certainly captures the spirit of our investigation into the intriguing connection between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US.
While it may sound like a cosmic coincidence or a plotline fit for a science fiction novel, our study takes a lighthearted approach to uncovering any statistical gravitational pull between these seemingly disparate variables. After all, in the world of research, there's always the gravitational risk of reaching for correlations that are lightyears away from any logical explanation.
With the assistance of Astropy's astronomical calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team of intrepid explorers set out on a celestial quest to unearth any astronomical influences on the earthly realm of academia. Armed with a telescope for stargazing and a robust statistical analysis toolkit, we embarked on a voyage that would make Galileo and Gauss proud.
In this paper, we present the celestial symphony of data and statistical analyses that have led us to unveil a fascinating correlation between the distance from our gas giant neighbor, Jupiter, to the radiant Sun and the compensation awarded to the erudite denizens of academia. As we navigate through the cosmos of statistical significance, we invite you to join us on an expedition that may leave you pondering the cosmic forces at play in the domain of professorial finances.
So, buckle up and set your sextant to statistical stardom as we delve into the planetary impact on professor salaries in the US, where the statistical stars align in ways that will leave you orbiting the realm of celestial curiosity.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[RESULTS]]



ChatGPT:

[[RESULTS]]

The statistical analysis revealed an astonishing correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US from 2009 to 2021. This "out of this world" correlation suggests that there may be more than just the gravitational pull between Earth and Jupiter influencing the earthly realms of academia!

With an r-squared value of 0.6813927, we can marvel at how over 68% of the variability in professor salaries can be explained by the distance from Jupiter to the Sun. It seems that as Jupiter orbits the Sun, so do the salaries of professors in the US, twirling in a cosmic dance that defies the conventional bounds of statistical relationships.

The p-value of less than 0.01 had us exclaiming, "Galileo's ghost! This association is as significant as the discovery of a new celestial body!" This p-value indicates that the likelihood of the observed correlation occurring by chance is as rare as a celestial event, affirming the robustness of the relationship between these celestial and terrestrial variables.

Our scatterplot (Fig. 1), which we proudly present to you, vividly illustrates the close relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries. It is as if the data points were aligning in planetary formation, showcasing a celestial ballet of statistical significance that would make Copernicus sit up and take notice.

These findings lead us to ponder whether there is an astrological impact on academic compensation—perhaps a cosmic conjunction that influences salary negotiations or a solstice of stellar significance that shapes the remuneration of our erudite educators. The implications of this correlation extend far beyond the weight of Jupiter's gravitational pull, leaving us enthralled by the cosmic mystery that underpins the financial universe of academia.

In conclusion, this study not only substantiates the connection between the planetary and the pecuniary but also invites us to gaze beyond the horizon of earthly explanations, igniting a sense of cosmic wonderment that may well leave us starry-eyed when considering the forces at play in the world of professor salaries.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
"Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.

Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
To our knowledge, no previous studies have directly explored the potential correlation between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries in the US. In "Celestial Bodies and Economic Anomalies," Smith and Doe discuss the impact of astronomical phenomena on economic trends, but the specific influence of Jupiter's orbit on academia remains uncharted territory.
However, as we venture into the astral unknown, it's crucial to consider literature that touches upon related themes. In "The Economics of the Solar System," Jones et al. muse on the interplanetary dynamics that may shape earthly financial systems, offering a theoretical foundation for our celestial investigation.
Delving into a more speculative realm, "Jupiter: A Cosmic Payroll?" introduces the notion of celestial bodies affecting earthly compensation, albeit within the context of a science fiction narrative. This work, while not grounded in empirical evidence, sparks the imagination and inspires us to explore the cosmic possibilities of our research question.
In our quest for interdisciplinary insights, we turned to television for a glimpse of fictional portrayals that might shed light on the intertwining of planetary movements and economic realms. "The Big Bang Theory" and "Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey" both offered glimpses into the cosmic mysteries, although their relevance to our specific inquiry may be light-years away.
Overall, the literature provides a blend of theoretical musings, fictional speculations, and popular portrayals of cosmic phenomena, serving as both an intellectual compass and a whimsical diversion in guiding our research into the uncharted cosmos of professor salaries and planetary perturbations.

[[RESULTS]]
The statistical analysis revealed an astonishing correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US from 2009 to 2021. This "out of this world" correlation suggests that there may be more than just the gravitational pull between Earth and Jupiter influencing the earthly realms of academia!
With an r-squared value of 0.6813927, we can marvel at how over 68% of the variability in professor salaries can be explained by the distance from Jupiter to the Sun. It seems that as Jupiter orbits the Sun, so do the salaries of professors in the US, twirling in a cosmic dance that defies the conventional bounds of statistical relationships.
The p-value of less than 0.01 had us exclaiming, "Galileo's ghost! This association is as significant as the discovery of a new celestial body!" This p-value indicates that the likelihood of the observed correlation occurring by chance is as rare as a celestial event, affirming the robustness of the relationship between these celestial and terrestrial variables.
Our scatterplot (Fig. 1), which we proudly present to you, vividly illustrates the close relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries. It is as if the data points were aligning in planetary formation, showcasing a celestial ballet of statistical significance that would make Copernicus sit up and take notice.
These findings lead us to ponder whether there is an astrological impact on academic compensation—perhaps a cosmic conjunction that influences salary negotiations or a solstice of stellar significance that shapes the remuneration of our erudite educators. The implications of this correlation extend far beyond the weight of Jupiter's gravitational pull, leaving us enthralled by the cosmic mystery that underpins the financial universe of academia.
In conclusion, this study not only substantiates the connection between the planetary and the pecuniary but also invites us to gaze beyond the horizon of earthly explanations, igniting a sense of cosmic wonderment that may well leave us starry-eyed when considering the forces at play in the world of professor salaries.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

Our findings astoundingly corroborate the speculative musings and theoretical groundwork laid out in the literature review. While we initially approached the idea of a connection between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries with a healthy dose of skepticism, our results have forced us to admit that there might indeed be some celestial chicanery at play in the realm of academia.

The celestial bodies, it seems, have conspired to exert their influence on earthly matters, much like the gods of Mount Olympus meddling in the affairs of mortals. Our statistically robust correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 not only supports the dramatic fiction of "Jupiter: A Cosmic Payroll?" but also adds a cosmic punchline to the mundane realities of professorial compensation.

The idea that Jupiter's orbital quirks could be entangled with the remuneration of erudite educators takes us on a journey that feels akin to a cosmic sitcom. In a cosmos where "The Big Bang Theory" is not just a television show but a potential cosmic reality, we are forced to consider the whimsical and the improbable with newfound seriousness.

Our study adds weight to the suggestion in "Celestial Bodies and Economic Anomalies" that astronomical phenomena may indeed influence economic trends—albeit in ways that stretch the boundaries of our imagination. The statistical relationships we have uncovered suggest that the dance of the planets may have more practical implications than mere celestial beauty, challenging our conventional understanding of cause and effect.

As we contemplate the interplay between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries, we are reminded of the words of Galileo, who once said, "E pur si muove"– "And yet it moves." While he referred to the Earth's motion around the Sun, our results suggest that there might be more truth to his words than previously thought, albeit in a celestial comedy of errors that has the unlikely protagonists of Jupiter and academic salaries in the leading roles.

In conclusion, our study has not only uncovered a statistical relationship but also presented a cosmic enigma that may leave us all pondering the interstellar forces at play in the worldly arena of academia. As we navigate this cosmic dance of statistical significance, it seems that the whims of the universe may have more weight in our earthly affairs than we ever dared to imagine.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Jupiter and the Sun and Professor salaries in the US. Make lots of jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Sneak in some jokes and clever puns about science, research, statistics, and the variables.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
"Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.

Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.

[[INTRDUCTION]]
As the saying goes, "When Jupiter aligns with Mars, peace will guide the planets, and salary negotiations will reach for the stars." Perhaps that's not the most scientifically accurate aphorism, but it certainly captures the spirit of our investigation into the intriguing connection between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US.
While it may sound like a cosmic coincidence or a plotline fit for a science fiction novel, our study takes a lighthearted approach to uncovering any statistical gravitational pull between these seemingly disparate variables. After all, in the world of research, there's always the gravitational risk of reaching for correlations that are lightyears away from any logical explanation.
With the assistance of Astropy's astronomical calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team of intrepid explorers set out on a celestial quest to unearth any astronomical influences on the earthly realm of academia. Armed with a telescope for stargazing and a robust statistical analysis toolkit, we embarked on a voyage that would make Galileo and Gauss proud.
In this paper, we present the celestial symphony of data and statistical analyses that have led us to unveil a fascinating correlation between the distance from our gas giant neighbor, Jupiter, to the radiant Sun and the compensation awarded to the erudite denizens of academia. As we navigate through the cosmos of statistical significance, we invite you to join us on an expedition that may leave you pondering the cosmic forces at play in the domain of professorial finances.
So, buckle up and set your sextant to statistical stardom as we delve into the planetary impact on professor salaries in the US, where the statistical stars align in ways that will leave you orbiting the realm of celestial curiosity.

[[RESULTS]]
The statistical analysis revealed an astonishing correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US from 2009 to 2021. This "out of this world" correlation suggests that there may be more than just the gravitational pull between Earth and Jupiter influencing the earthly realms of academia!
With an r-squared value of 0.6813927, we can marvel at how over 68% of the variability in professor salaries can be explained by the distance from Jupiter to the Sun. It seems that as Jupiter orbits the Sun, so do the salaries of professors in the US, twirling in a cosmic dance that defies the conventional bounds of statistical relationships.
The p-value of less than 0.01 had us exclaiming, "Galileo's ghost! This association is as significant as the discovery of a new celestial body!" This p-value indicates that the likelihood of the observed correlation occurring by chance is as rare as a celestial event, affirming the robustness of the relationship between these celestial and terrestrial variables.
Our scatterplot (Fig. 1), which we proudly present to you, vividly illustrates the close relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries. It is as if the data points were aligning in planetary formation, showcasing a celestial ballet of statistical significance that would make Copernicus sit up and take notice.
These findings lead us to ponder whether there is an astrological impact on academic compensation—perhaps a cosmic conjunction that influences salary negotiations or a solstice of stellar significance that shapes the remuneration of our erudite educators. The implications of this correlation extend far beyond the weight of Jupiter's gravitational pull, leaving us enthralled by the cosmic mystery that underpins the financial universe of academia.
In conclusion, this study not only substantiates the connection between the planetary and the pecuniary but also invites us to gaze beyond the horizon of earthly explanations, igniting a sense of cosmic wonderment that may well leave us starry-eyed when considering the forces at play in the world of professor salaries.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[CONCLUSION]]

In closing, the cosmic dance of data has led us to a celestial symphony of statistical significance, unveiling a correlation between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and professor salaries in the US that is as undeniable as the existence of Pluto (sorry, Pluto, we still love you). Our findings showcase a gravitational pull between these variables stronger than the grip of a black hole—raising the possibility of a "Jupiter Salary Effect" that may dwarf the influence of earthly factors in the economics of academia.

As we gaze at the scatterplot that could rival a celestial mural, it's clear that the universe has conspired to weave a statistical tapestry that defies our traditional understanding of professorial compensation. The r-squared value soars like a cosmic comet, illuminating over 68% of the variability in salaries—suggesting that as Jupiter orbits serenely, so do the earnings of our esteemed educators, creating a celestial waltz that leaves us marveling at the statistical stars aligning.

With a p-value rarer than spotting a shooting star, our results stand as firm as the Pillars of Creation, affirming the robust relationship between these astral and earthly spheres. It's as if the gods of statistics have convened for a cosmic congress, bestowing upon us a correlation as awe-inspiring as the birth of a new star.

In the spirit of cosmic completeness, we assert that further inquiries into this "out of this world" correlation are as unnecessary as a spacesuit on Saturn. Our study not only establishes the statistical significance of this cosmic connection but also invites scholars and stargazers alike to ponder the profound implications of the celestial on the pecuniary, leaving us starry-eyed in the face of the astronomical forces at play in the world of professor salaries. As we draw the curtains on this research, we hope it sparks a celestial wonderment, as we continue to uncover the cosmic mysteries that influence our earthly endeavors.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

Astronomical Economics Quarterly


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

National Association for Celestial Economic Research


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled Exploring the 'Planetary' Impact: The Correlation Between Jupiter-Sun Distance and Professor Salaries in the US with an abstract of This research study delves into the celestial depths to investigate the relationship between the distance from Jupiter to the Sun and the salaries of professors in the US. Utilizing data from Astropy's calculations and the National Center for Education Statistics, our team embarked on an astronomical journey to uncover any potential link, aiming to shed light on this peculiar connection.
Surprisingly, our findings revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.8254652 and a significant p-value of less than 0.01 for the years 2009 to 2021. This indicates a strong association between the two variables, leaving us marveling at the cosmic implications for academia. While the astronomical mechanics behind this correlation remain elusive, it appears that there may be more to the universe's influence on earthly matters than previously imagined. We hope this study not only sparks curiosity but also ignites a sense of celestial wonderment among scholars and stargazers alike.

ChatGPT:

Jupiter-Sun distance, professors salaries, US, correlation, Astropy, National Center for Education Statistics, relationship, celestial influence, cosmic implications, academia, astronomical, celestial wonderment, scholars, stargazers

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.



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Data details

The distance between Jupiter and the Sun
Detailed data title: The average distance between Jupiter and the Sun as measured on the first day of each month
Source: Caclculated using Astropy
Additional Info: I wrote a Python script using Astropy to calculate the distance between the named planets on the first day of each month for every year.

See what else correlates with The distance between Jupiter and the Sun

Professor salaries in the US
Detailed data title: Average salary of full-time instructional faculty on 9-month contracts in degree-granting postsecondary institutions, by academic rank of Professor
Source: National Center for Education Statistics
See what else correlates with Professor salaries in the US

Correlation r = 0.8254652 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r2 = 0.6813927 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 68.1% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Professor salaries in the US) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., The distance between Jupiter and the Sun) over the 13 years from 2009 through 2021.

p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 0.000511. 0.0005105293139391995000000000
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme. More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.83 in 0.0511% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 1,959 random variables Which I absolutely did.
with the same 12 degrees of freedom, Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 12 because we have two variables measured over a period of 13 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.5, 0.95 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!


All values for the years included above: If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.
2009201020112012201320142015201620172018201920202021
The distance between Jupiter and the Sun (Planetary distance (AU))5.059864.973054.954015.009535.120535.252175.367865.439295.450285.398735.296055.166335.04464
Professor salaries in the US (Salary)134915133892132719131745132028134443136755138492138746138826139640136906130262




Why this works

  1. Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
  2. Lack of causal connection: There is probably Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
    no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
  3. Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
    p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.




Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."


# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([5.05986,4.97305,4.95401,5.00953,5.12053,5.25217,5.36786,5.43929,5.45028,5.39873,5.29605,5.16633,5.04464,])
array_2 = np.array([134915,133892,132719,131745,132028,134443,136755,138492,138746,138826,139640,136906,130262,])
array_1_name = "The distance between Jupiter and the Sun"
array_2_name = "Professor salaries in the US"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)



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You do not need to attribute "the spurious correlations website," and you don't even need to link here if you don't want to. I don't gain anything from pageviews. There are no ads on this site, there is nothing for sale, and I am not for hire.

For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

When spoken, my last name is pronounced "vegan," like I don't eat meat.

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Correlation ID: 1435 · Black Variable ID: 1928 · Red Variable ID: 1201
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