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Spurious correlation #2,943 · View random

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and the second variable is Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL).  The chart goes from 2012 to 2021, and the two variables track closely in value over that time. Small Image
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AI explanation

As more military tech experts graduated, they formed an elite squad of algorithm-crunching, strategic masterminds who infiltrated the stock market, launching a full-on bullish assault on Alphabet's shares. It turns out, the best defense really is a good offense, especially when it comes to portfolio management. This just goes to show that in the battle of wits on Wall Street, sometimes the real winners are armed with diplomas!

Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Generate an image of a group of graduates in military technologies and applied sciences celebrating their bachelor's degrees. They are depicted in realistic style, all smiling and holding their diplomas proudly. Behind them, show a stock market ticker displaying Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL) soaring higher and higher. In the background, include a fleet of sleek robotic drones taking flight, symbolizing the increasing influence of technology in military operations. The overall scene should conflate the joy of achievement with the futuristic impact of technology on the military landscape. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.
This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: a Polaroid photo Realistic Art nouveau a Polaroid photo Macabre
ChatGPT: Realistic

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL), in the following situation: Because as more students learn military technologies, they realize that Google's parent company Alphabet is secretly developing a fleet of robotic drones to reign supreme in the skies, prompting them to invest, and driving up the stock price.. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: A group of graduates in military technologies and applied sciences celebrate their bachelor's degrees while standing in front of a stock market ticker showing Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL) soaring higher and higher. Meanwhile, in the background, a fleet of robotic drones can be seen taking flight, symbolizing the increasing influence of technology in military operations.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ Realistic ] and depicting this scene: A group of graduates in military technologies and applied sciences celebrate their bachelor's degrees while standing in front of a stock market ticker showing Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL) soaring higher and higher. Meanwhile, in the background, a fleet of robotic drones can be seen taking flight, symbolizing the increasing influence of technology in military operations. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Generate an image of a group of graduates in military technologies and applied sciences celebrating their bachelor's degrees. They are depicted in realistic style, all smiling and holding their diplomas proudly. Behind them, show a stock market ticker displaying Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL) soaring higher and higher. In the background, include a fleet of sleek robotic drones taking flight, symbolizing the increasing influence of technology in military operations. The overall scene should conflate the joy of achievement with the futuristic impact of technology on the military landscape.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how an increase in Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences caused Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL) to increase. Add a funny one-liner at the end.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.01)
The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price

Journal of Financial Alphabetology

Jan 2024

Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real!
Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.




Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a dry but witty academic researcher. You speak in the passive voice, and your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal.You write titles and abstracts of goofy academic research papers.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, and add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please draft the title and abstract of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Make the title punny if you can come up with clever pun. If not, just make it sound clever.

Your research team used data from National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) to assess this nagging question. You found a correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and p < 0.01 for 2012 to 2021.

Please respond in this format (replace "Lorem ipsum dolor sit" with your title and abstract)

[[TITLE]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit

[[ABSTRACT]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit



ChatGPT:
[[TITLE]]
"The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.

While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a dry but witty academic researcher. You speak in the passive voice, and your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal.You draft the introduction section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the introduction section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.

While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[INTRODUCTION]]



ChatGPT:
[[INTRODUCTION]]

The intersection between military technologies and applied sciences and the stock market may at first seem as incongruous as a submarine in a desert. However, as we dive into this research, we aim to shed light on the unexpected correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in this field and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). It is a correlation that may have you saying, "At ease with the math, soldier!"

The allure of military technologies and applied sciences in the context of stock price movements has not escaped our attention. This unexpected relationship has the potential to unleash a barrage of new insights and implications for investors and educators alike. It's as if the stock market is performing its own version of drill exercises.

Harnessing data from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we aim to uncover the mysteries behind this connection, just like a detective snooping around a military base. By doing so, we hope to provide better understanding and maybe even some light entertainment to those interested in the seemingly uncharted territory of stock market movements.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a dry but witty academic researcher. You speak in the passive voice, and your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then cite some social media posts you read that seem to be related.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.

While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
The intersection between military technologies and applied sciences and the stock market may at first seem as incongruous as a submarine in a desert. However, as we dive into this research, we aim to shed light on the unexpected correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in this field and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). It is a correlation that may have you saying, "At ease with the math, soldier!"
The allure of military technologies and applied sciences in the context of stock price movements has not escaped our attention. This unexpected relationship has the potential to unleash a barrage of new insights and implications for investors and educators alike. It's as if the stock market is performing its own version of drill exercises.
Harnessing data from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we aim to uncover the mysteries behind this connection, just like a detective snooping around a military base. By doing so, we hope to provide better understanding and maybe even some light entertainment to those interested in the seemingly uncharted territory of stock market movements.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]



ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

Several studies have examined the relationship between educational trends and stock market performance. In "Smith and Doe," the authors find a positive correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of technology companies. Similarly, "Jones" identifies a significant association between the educational background of individuals in the technology sector and the stock performance of relevant companies. These findings suggest a potential link between military technology education and stock market movements that warrants further investigation.

Now, it's time to turn to some texts that sound like they could be related to this topic. "The Art of War" by Sun Tzu may seem like an unlikely source for insights into stock market trends, but its strategic principles could provide some surprising parallels. Similarly, "Ghost Fleet" by P.W. Singer and August Cole offers a fictional narrative about technological warfare that could spark some imaginative connections to stock market dynamics. Additionally, "Starship Troopers" by Robert A. Heinlein delves into military technology and its societal implications, albeit in a fictional realm - but who's to say there aren't real-world implications for stock prices as well?

In the realm of social media, a Twitter post by @TechInvestorXYZ asserts, "The rise of military technology graduates is like launching a new IPO - it's all about strategic positioning for market domination." This perspective from the Twittersphere sheds light on the speculation surrounding the connection between military technology education and stock market dynamics.

Oh, that's a good one! It's as if the stock market is embroiled in a battle of wits and weapons, and those with military technology knowledge are the unexpected generals of the financial front lines. With insights and puns to boot, this literature review provides a diverse array of perspectives on the intriguing correlation between Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet Inc.'s stock price.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a dry but witty academic researcher. You speak in the passive voice, and your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) . You used data from 2012 to 2021

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.

While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.

[[INTRODUCTION]]
The intersection between military technologies and applied sciences and the stock market may at first seem as incongruous as a submarine in a desert. However, as we dive into this research, we aim to shed light on the unexpected correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in this field and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). It is a correlation that may have you saying, "At ease with the math, soldier!"
The allure of military technologies and applied sciences in the context of stock price movements has not escaped our attention. This unexpected relationship has the potential to unleash a barrage of new insights and implications for investors and educators alike. It's as if the stock market is performing its own version of drill exercises.
Harnessing data from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we aim to uncover the mysteries behind this connection, just like a detective snooping around a military base. By doing so, we hope to provide better understanding and maybe even some light entertainment to those interested in the seemingly uncharted territory of stock market movements.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]



ChatGPT:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

In order to investigate the relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL), a comprehensive and meticulous research approach was employed. Our research team gathered data from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), with a focus on the years spanning from 2012 to 2021. This timeframe was chosen to capture a broad spectrum of market dynamics and educational trends, akin to a soldier surveying the battlefield over a decade.

To begin, the data on Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences was gathered from the National Center for Education Statistics, which provided a robust and standardized source of information comparable to a well-structured formation of troops. This data encompassed the number of degrees awarded annually, and was cross-referenced with personnel records to ensure accuracy and consistency. The stock price data for Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) was obtained from LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), leveraging their comprehensive financial databases comparable to a well-stocked arsenal.

The next step in the analysis involved employing advanced statistical methods to assess the correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). The Pearson correlation coefficient was calculated to measure the strength and direction of the linear relationship between these variables, akin to evaluating the precision of military equipment. Additionally, a multiple regression analysis was conducted to control for potential confounding variables and uncover the underlying factors driving this unexpected connection.

To ensure the robustness and reliability of our findings, sensitivity analyses were conducted, modifying the time frame and inclusion criteria to test the stability of the observed relationship. The methodology was designed to withstand scrutiny and skepticism, much like a sturdy bunker in the face of attack.

Finally, a battery of diagnostic tests and model fit assessments were performed to evaluate the validity and generalizability of the results. The statistical models were scrutinized with the same attention to detail as a sergeant inspecting the troops to guarantee their readiness for battle. This comprehensive approach aimed to provide a nuanced and comprehensive understanding of the link between military technology education and stock price movements, ensuring that our findings are as rock-solid as a well-fortified base.

In summary, the methodology implemented in this study entailed a rigorous and methodical approach to unravel the intricate relationship between Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). This research aimed to capture the essence of precision and thoroughness, much like a disciplined soldier executing a meticulously planned operation.

And remember, "I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug".


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a dry but witty academic researcher. You speak in the passive voice, and your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv) .

For the time period 2012 to 2021, you found a correlation 0.9879064, r-squared of 0.9759590, and p < 0.01.

One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.

While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.

-------

And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
The intersection between military technologies and applied sciences and the stock market may at first seem as incongruous as a submarine in a desert. However, as we dive into this research, we aim to shed light on the unexpected correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in this field and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). It is a correlation that may have you saying, "At ease with the math, soldier!"
The allure of military technologies and applied sciences in the context of stock price movements has not escaped our attention. This unexpected relationship has the potential to unleash a barrage of new insights and implications for investors and educators alike. It's as if the stock market is performing its own version of drill exercises.
Harnessing data from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we aim to uncover the mysteries behind this connection, just like a detective snooping around a military base. By doing so, we hope to provide better understanding and maybe even some light entertainment to those interested in the seemingly uncharted territory of stock market movements.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[RESULTS]]



ChatGPT:

[[RESULTS]]

The analysis of the data from 2012 to 2021 revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). With an r-squared of 0.9759590, the relationship between these seemingly disparate variables is more tightly linked than a pair of combat boots.

The statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01 suggests that the observed correlation is not just a random fluke, but a significant finding worthy of attention. It's as if the stock market and military technologies are engaged in a coordinated march, moving in lockstep with each other.

Furthermore, the scatterplot (Fig. 1) visually illustrates the robust positive relationship between Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price. The data points align so closely, it's as if they're following orders from a commanding officer.

Now, let’s not leap to conclusions like a paratrooper jumping out of an airplane. The observed correlation does not imply causation, and it would be hasty to presume that earning a degree in military technologies directly leads to an increase in Alphabet's stock price. However, our findings do warrant further investigation into the underlying dynamics at play.

In conclusion, the unexpectedly strong correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. raises intriguing questions and potential implications for both the education and investment communities. As investors ponder over their stock portfolios, they may find themselves contemplating the unforeseen impact of military technology education on the digital domain, with a sense of humor as dry as desert camouflage.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a dry but witty academic researcher. You speak in the passive voice, and your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
"The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.

While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
Several studies have examined the relationship between educational trends and stock market performance. In "Smith and Doe," the authors find a positive correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of technology companies. Similarly, "Jones" identifies a significant association between the educational background of individuals in the technology sector and the stock performance of relevant companies. These findings suggest a potential link between military technology education and stock market movements that warrants further investigation.
Now, it's time to turn to some texts that sound like they could be related to this topic. "The Art of War" by Sun Tzu may seem like an unlikely source for insights into stock market trends, but its strategic principles could provide some surprising parallels. Similarly, "Ghost Fleet" by P.W. Singer and August Cole offers a fictional narrative about technological warfare that could spark some imaginative connections to stock market dynamics. Additionally, "Starship Troopers" by Robert A. Heinlein delves into military technology and its societal implications, albeit in a fictional realm - but who's to say there aren't real-world implications for stock prices as well?
In the realm of social media, a Twitter post by @TechInvestorXYZ asserts, "The rise of military technology graduates is like launching a new IPO - it's all about strategic positioning for market domination." This perspective from the Twittersphere sheds light on the speculation surrounding the connection between military technology education and stock market dynamics.
Oh, that's a good one! It's as if the stock market is embroiled in a battle of wits and weapons, and those with military technology knowledge are the unexpected generals of the financial front lines. With insights and puns to boot, this literature review provides a diverse array of perspectives on the intriguing correlation between Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet Inc.'s stock price.

[[RESULTS]]
The analysis of the data from 2012 to 2021 revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). With an r-squared of 0.9759590, the relationship between these seemingly disparate variables is more tightly linked than a pair of combat boots.
The statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01 suggests that the observed correlation is not just a random fluke, but a significant finding worthy of attention. It's as if the stock market and military technologies are engaged in a coordinated march, moving in lockstep with each other.
Furthermore, the scatterplot (Fig. 1) visually illustrates the robust positive relationship between Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price. The data points align so closely, it's as if they're following orders from a commanding officer.
Now, let’s not leap to conclusions like a paratrooper jumping out of an airplane. The observed correlation does not imply causation, and it would be hasty to presume that earning a degree in military technologies directly leads to an increase in Alphabet's stock price. However, our findings do warrant further investigation into the underlying dynamics at play.
In conclusion, the unexpectedly strong correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. raises intriguing questions and potential implications for both the education and investment communities. As investors ponder over their stock portfolios, they may find themselves contemplating the unforeseen impact of military technology education on the digital domain, with a sense of humor as dry as desert camouflage.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

The results of this study underscore the surprising association between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). The robust correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 aligns with prior research by Smith and Doe, providing empirical support for their findings. This correlation is more solid than a well-constructed fort and might lead one to quip, "This military technology education trend is really marching in step with Alphabet's stock price."

Our analysis reaffirms Jones's identification of a significant link between individuals' educational backgrounds and stock performance in the technology sector, shedding light on the broader implications of military technology education on investment dynamics. It's as if the stock market has enlisted educated individuals in military technologies to bolster its ranks, resulting in a disciplined and coherent market performance.

Our research also nods to some unexpected literary parallels, such as "The Art of War" by Sun Tzu. While it may seem far-fetched to draw connections between ancient military strategies and modern stock market dynamics, the correlation highlighted in this study suggests that perhaps there are underlying principles that transcend time and context. One might even quip, "Just as Sun Tzu's principles have stood the test of time, so too does the association between military technology education and Alphabet's stock price."

Furthermore, the scatterplot in Figure 1 visually illustrates the striking alignment between Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price. It's as if the data points are executing a perfectly synchronized drill, demonstrating a level of coordination as impressive as a perfectly executed military operation. One might be inclined to quip, "It's as if the data points are following commands from a seasoned general, marching in unison towards market success."

As we proceed with our investigation, it is important to emphasize that correlation does not imply causation, and it would be imprudent to draw hasty conclusions. Additional research is warranted to decipher the underlying mechanisms driving this unexpected correlation. So, while our findings add substantial weight to the notion of a connection between military technology education and stock market dynamics, caution must be exercised in attributing causality.

In summary, this study offers a thought-provoking exploration of the relationship between educational trends in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). While our findings may raise eyebrows and prompt a few playful quips, they also underscore the need for further examination of the interactions between education, technology, and financial markets.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a dry but witty academic researcher. You speak in the passive voice, and your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL). You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
"The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.

While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.

[[INTRDUCTION]]
The intersection between military technologies and applied sciences and the stock market may at first seem as incongruous as a submarine in a desert. However, as we dive into this research, we aim to shed light on the unexpected correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in this field and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). It is a correlation that may have you saying, "At ease with the math, soldier!"
The allure of military technologies and applied sciences in the context of stock price movements has not escaped our attention. This unexpected relationship has the potential to unleash a barrage of new insights and implications for investors and educators alike. It's as if the stock market is performing its own version of drill exercises.
Harnessing data from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), we aim to uncover the mysteries behind this connection, just like a detective snooping around a military base. By doing so, we hope to provide better understanding and maybe even some light entertainment to those interested in the seemingly uncharted territory of stock market movements.

[[RESULTS]]
The analysis of the data from 2012 to 2021 revealed a striking correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). With an r-squared of 0.9759590, the relationship between these seemingly disparate variables is more tightly linked than a pair of combat boots.
The statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01 suggests that the observed correlation is not just a random fluke, but a significant finding worthy of attention. It's as if the stock market and military technologies are engaged in a coordinated march, moving in lockstep with each other.
Furthermore, the scatterplot (Fig. 1) visually illustrates the robust positive relationship between Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and Alphabet's stock price. The data points align so closely, it's as if they're following orders from a commanding officer.
Now, let’s not leap to conclusions like a paratrooper jumping out of an airplane. The observed correlation does not imply causation, and it would be hasty to presume that earning a degree in military technologies directly leads to an increase in Alphabet's stock price. However, our findings do warrant further investigation into the underlying dynamics at play.
In conclusion, the unexpectedly strong correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. raises intriguing questions and potential implications for both the education and investment communities. As investors ponder over their stock portfolios, they may find themselves contemplating the unforeseen impact of military technology education on the digital domain, with a sense of humor as dry as desert camouflage.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[CONCLUSION]]

In closing, our study has successfully unveiled a remarkably strong correlation between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL). The results suggest that there is a closer relationship between these variables than between a soldier and their trusty rifle - it's a tight bond that demands attention.

The statistically significant findings of this research indicate that the observed correlation is not just a mere coincidence, but a substantial discovery that cannot be dismissed. It's as if the market and military technology education have formed a tactical alliance, strategizing their movements in sync.

While we must exercise caution and avoid jumping to conclusions faster than a military kangaroo, the implications of this unexpected correlation are as clear as a soldier's morning reveille. Further research is indeed warranted to fully comprehend the mechanisms driving this intriguing relationship.

In the meantime, investors and educators alike may want to keep a watchful eye on how this unlikely pairing plays out in the marketplace, where the impact of military technology education on stock performance may just be the secret weapon investors have been looking for. Remember, in the volatile battlefield of stock markets, sometimes it's better to be knowledgeable than lucky - a sentiment as timeless as a good ol' dad joke.

With that said, it is our firm conviction that no further research is needed in this area. The evidence has been presented, and it's as compelling as a military parade.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

Journal of Financial Alphabetology


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

The Society for Interdisciplinary Military Studies and Alphabet Analyzation


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled The Alphabet Boot Camp: Analyzing the Impact of Bachelor's Degrees in Military Technologies and Applied Sciences on Alphabet's (GOOGL) Stock Price with an abstract of This study delves into the intriguing relationship between the number of Bachelor's degrees awarded in military technologies and applied sciences and the stock price of Alphabet Inc. (GOOGL) over the period from 2012 to 2021. Leveraging datasets from the National Center for Education Statistics and LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv), our analysis reveals a remarkable correlation coefficient of 0.9879064 and statistically significant p-value of less than 0.01.
While it may seem like comparing military technology training to a stock price is like comparing apples to oranges, our findings suggest otherwise, hinting at a potential connection that is as unexpected as a soldier armed with a fruit salad. As the number of individuals equipped with knowledge in military technologies and applied sciences increases, it appears to wield an influence on the stock performance of Alphabet Inc. Much like a sergeant barking orders, the data commands attention to this intriguing association. Further research is needed to unravel the underlying mechanisms of this peculiar correlation, but for now, investors may want to keep an eye on the battlefield of military technology education for potential stock market intelligence.

ChatGPT:

Alphabet Inc. stock price, military technologies, applied sciences, Bachelor's degrees, correlation, National Center for Education Statistics, LSEG Analytics, Refinitiv, stock performance, investment, correlation coefficient, statistical significance, underlying mechanisms, stock market intelligence, educational impact, technology education

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.



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Data details

Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies
Detailed data title: Bachelor's degrees conferred by postsecondary institutions, in field of study: Military technologies and applied sciences
Source: National Center for Education Statistics
See what else correlates with Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies

Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL)
Detailed data title: Opening price of Alphabet (GOOGL) on the first trading day of the year
Source: LSEG Analytics (Refinitiv)
Additional Info: Via Microsoft Excel Stockhistory function

See what else correlates with Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL)

Correlation r = 0.9879064 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r2 = 0.9759590 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 97.6% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL)) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies) over the 10 years from 2012 through 2021.

p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 9.2E-8. 0.0000000922326210152130200000
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme. More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.99 in 9.2E-6% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 10,842,151 random variables You don't actually need 10 million variables to find a correlation like this one. I don't have that many variables in my database. You can also correlate variables that are not independent. I do this a lot.

p-value calculations are useful for understanding the probability of a result happening by chance. They are most useful when used to highlight the risk of a fluke outcome. For example, if you calculate a p-value of 0.30, the risk that the result is a fluke is high. It is good to know that! But there are lots of ways to get a p-value of less than 0.01, as evidenced by this project.

In this particular case, the values are so extreme as to be meaningless. That's why no one reports p-values with specificity after they drop below 0.01.

Just to be clear: I'm being completely transparent about the calculations. There is no math trickery. This is just how statistics shakes out when you calculate hundreds of millions of random correlations.
with the same 9 degrees of freedom, Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 9 because we have two variables measured over a period of 10 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.95, 1 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!


All values for the years included above: If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.
2012201320142015201620172018201920202021
Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies (Degrees awarded)8610518527635846965576711561524
Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL) (Stock price)16.341827.9126.6338.1140.0352.6551.3667.4288




Why this works

  1. Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
  2. Lack of causal connection: There is probably Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
    no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
  3. Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
    p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.




Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."


# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([86,105,185,276,358,469,655,767,1156,1524,])
array_2 = np.array([16.34,18,27.91,26.63,38.11,40.03,52.65,51.36,67.42,88,])
array_1_name = "Bachelor's degrees awarded in Military technologies"
array_2_name = "Alphabet's stock price (GOOGL)"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)



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For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

When spoken, my last name is pronounced "vegan," like I don't eat meat.

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Correlation ID: 2943 · Black Variable ID: 1284 · Red Variable ID: 1542
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