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Spurious correlation #2,064 · View random

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is Burglaries in Colorado and the second variable is Viewership count for Days of Our Lives.  The chart goes from 1985 to 2021, and the two variables track closely in value over that time. Small Image

AI explanation

As burglary rates dropped in Colorado, the demand for security systems also decreased. Fewer people were tuning in to Days of Our Lives because they no longer needed the adrenaline rush of watching fictional break-ins and the dramatic aftermath. With their actual homes feeling safer, the escapism provided by the show just couldn't compete with the peace of mind.

Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Generate an image that looks like it is a scene from a Disney movie, depicting a cozy living room in Colorado. In the living room, a television is tuned to Days of Our Lives, showing the main character, Stefano, plotting a burglary in the fictional town of Salem. The TV screen glows with warm, familiar opening credits as the evening sun sets outside the window, casting a warm orange light over the scene. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.
This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: Brutalism An image that looks like it is a scene from A Disney Movie Scalar art An image that looks like it is a scene from a Pixar movie Brutalism
ChatGPT: An image that looks like it is a scene from A Disney Movie

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives together. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: In a cozy living room in Colorado, a television is tuned to Days of Our Lives, with the main character, Stefano, plotting a burglary in the fictional town of Salem. The TV screen glows with the show's familiar opening credits as the evening sun sets outside the window, casting a warm orange light over the scene.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ An image that looks like it is a scene from A Disney Movie ] and depicting this scene: In a cozy living room in Colorado, a television is tuned to Days of Our Lives, with the main character, Stefano, plotting a burglary in the fictional town of Salem. The TV screen glows with the show's familiar opening credits as the evening sun sets outside the window, casting a warm orange light over the scene. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Generate an image that looks like it is a scene from a Disney movie, depicting a cozy living room in Colorado. In the living room, a television is tuned to Days of Our Lives, showing the main character, Stefano, plotting a burglary in the fictional town of Salem. The TV screen glows with warm, familiar opening credits as the evening sun sets outside the window, casting a warm orange light over the scene.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how a decrease in Burglaries in Colorado caused Viewership count for Days of Our Lives to decrease. Make it feel plausible.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.01)
The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado

Journal of Criminal Shenanigans

Jan 2024
Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.




Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You write titles and abstracts of goofy academic research papers.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, and add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please draft the title and abstract of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Make the title a clever pun.

Your research team used data from FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and Wikipedia to assess this nagging question. You found a correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and p < 0.01 for 1985 to 2021.

Please respond in this format (replace "Lorem ipsum dolor sit" with your title and abstract)

[[TITLE]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit

[[ABSTRACT]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit



ChatGPT:
[[TITLE]]
"The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the introduction section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the introduction section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[INTRODUCTION]]



ChatGPT:
[[INTRODUCTION]]

The relationship between television programming and societal behavior has long been a subject of fascination and speculation. From debates over the impact of violent media on aggression to the influence of reality television on social norms, the connection between what we watch and how we act has been a topic of perennial interest. Our study delves into this complex relationship by examining the peculiar correlation between the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives," a beloved soap opera that has captured the hearts of audiences for decades, and the incidences of burglaries in the state of Colorado.

As researchers, we find ourselves in the midst of a narrative worthy of its own soap opera. It is a saga of data analysis, statistical scrutiny, and unexpected plot twists that lead us to a conclusion both surprising and thought-provoking. While our investigation may initially sound like the setup for a punchline, the statistical evidence we have uncovered is no laughing matter, although we certainly found the results to be quite comical. However, we approach this investigation with the utmost seriousness, understanding the importance of providing evidence-based insights, even if they are delivered with a touch of whimsy.

The choice of "Days of Our Lives" as the focal point of our analysis may raise an eyebrow or two, but we selected this show for its enduring popularity and cultural influence. Indeed, the intertwining storylines of love, betrayal, and familial drama have captivated audiences for over half a century. Yet, one would hardly expect this daytime drama to have any bearing on criminal activity, particularly burglaries. It is precisely this contrarian assumption that prompted our rigorous investigation, and we invite readers to join us in unraveling the mystery behind this seemingly improbable connection.

At the heart of our study is an extensive analysis of data sourced from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, providing a comprehensive account of reported burglaries in Colorado spanning several decades. Alongside this, we meticulously compiled viewership data for "Days of Our Lives" from the open source platform Wikipedia, crafting a timeline that mirrors the dramatic arcs of both the soap opera and, it seems, the criminal activities in the state. Our initial exploration led us to an unexpected revelation: a correlation that defied conventional wisdom, showcasing the serendipitous kinship between daytime drama and criminal misadventure.

In the following sections, we present the fruits of our labor in statistical analysis, examining the robustness of the correlation and exploring potential factors that may underpin this curious relationship. As we weave through the fabric of our findings, we encourage readers to indulge in the bewildering amusement of our results, challenging preconceived notions and embracing the delightful enigma that is the intersection of televised melodrama and real-world malfeasance. While our investigation may raise some eyebrows, we trust that the evidence we present will give researchers and enthusiasts alike ample fodder for contemplation and, perhaps, a chuckle or two.

The lure of the unexpected often brings the most captivating narratives to our attention, and our study is no exception. With an earnest yet undeniably whimsical approach, we invite readers to embark on this academic journey, wherein the mundane is transformed into a remarkable tale of correlation, curiosity, and a touch of the absurd. The curtain has risen on our investigation, and the stage is set for a performance that promises to captivate, entertain, and, ultimately, elicit a wry smile from those who dare to partake in the peculiar dynamics of our findings.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then devolve ever further, and mention something completely ridiculous, like you conducted literature review by reading CVS receipts.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
The relationship between television programming and societal behavior has long been a subject of fascination and speculation. From debates over the impact of violent media on aggression to the influence of reality television on social norms, the connection between what we watch and how we act has been a topic of perennial interest. Our study delves into this complex relationship by examining the peculiar correlation between the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives," a beloved soap opera that has captured the hearts of audiences for decades, and the incidences of burglaries in the state of Colorado.
As researchers, we find ourselves in the midst of a narrative worthy of its own soap opera. It is a saga of data analysis, statistical scrutiny, and unexpected plot twists that lead us to a conclusion both surprising and thought-provoking. While our investigation may initially sound like the setup for a punchline, the statistical evidence we have uncovered is no laughing matter, although we certainly found the results to be quite comical. However, we approach this investigation with the utmost seriousness, understanding the importance of providing evidence-based insights, even if they are delivered with a touch of whimsy.
The choice of "Days of Our Lives" as the focal point of our analysis may raise an eyebrow or two, but we selected this show for its enduring popularity and cultural influence. Indeed, the intertwining storylines of love, betrayal, and familial drama have captivated audiences for over half a century. Yet, one would hardly expect this daytime drama to have any bearing on criminal activity, particularly burglaries. It is precisely this contrarian assumption that prompted our rigorous investigation, and we invite readers to join us in unraveling the mystery behind this seemingly improbable connection.
At the heart of our study is an extensive analysis of data sourced from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, providing a comprehensive account of reported burglaries in Colorado spanning several decades. Alongside this, we meticulously compiled viewership data for "Days of Our Lives" from the open source platform Wikipedia, crafting a timeline that mirrors the dramatic arcs of both the soap opera and, it seems, the criminal activities in the state. Our initial exploration led us to an unexpected revelation: a correlation that defied conventional wisdom, showcasing the serendipitous kinship between daytime drama and criminal misadventure.
In the following sections, we present the fruits of our labor in statistical analysis, examining the robustness of the correlation and exploring potential factors that may underpin this curious relationship. As we weave through the fabric of our findings, we encourage readers to indulge in the bewildering amusement of our results, challenging preconceived notions and embracing the delightful enigma that is the intersection of televised melodrama and real-world malfeasance. While our investigation may raise some eyebrows, we trust that the evidence we present will give researchers and enthusiasts alike ample fodder for contemplation and, perhaps, a chuckle or two.
The lure of the unexpected often brings the most captivating narratives to our attention, and our study is no exception. With an earnest yet undeniably whimsical approach, we invite readers to embark on this academic journey, wherein the mundane is transformed into a remarkable tale of correlation, curiosity, and a touch of the absurd. The curtain has risen on our investigation, and the stage is set for a performance that promises to captivate, entertain, and, ultimately, elicit a wry smile from those who dare to partake in the peculiar dynamics of our findings.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]



ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

The connections between seemingly incongruent phenomena have long fascinated researchers, prompting investigation into the most unexpected correlations. This literature review seeks to contextualize the intricate relationship between television programming and societal behavior, specifically focusing on the surprising association between the viewership count for the soap opera "Days of Our Lives" and the incidence of burglaries in the state of Colorado. While this inquiry may initially appear unconventional, the statistical evidence presented in this paper compels a thorough examination of this curious convergence.

In "Smith et al.," the authors have examined the broader impact of television programming on viewer behavior, highlighting the ways in which media consumption can influence social attitudes and actions. The findings of this study lay the groundwork for understanding the potential influence of televised content on real-world activities, setting the stage for the unconventional investigation at hand. Similarly, "Doe and Jones" have explored the psychological mechanisms underlying audience engagement with soap operas, delving into the emotional resonance and cognitive processing that shape viewer responses. These insights offer a lens through which to consider the impact of "Days of Our Lives" on its audience, hinting at the potential for broader societal repercussions.

Expanding beyond the realm of academic literature, non-fiction works such as "The Economics of Television" by John Smith and "Crime and Media" by Jane Doe provide a broader understanding of the economic and sociological dimensions of media effects. While these texts do not directly address the specific relationship under scrutiny, they offer foundational knowledge that informs the interdisciplinary nature of this investigation.

In the realm of fiction, the narrative allure of daytime dramas has been immortalized in literary works such as "Love and Larceny: A Soap Opera Mystery" by Emily Jones and "The Burglar's Betrayal" by Sarah Doe. While these novels may not offer empirical insights, they capture the thematic resonance of soap operas and criminal misadventures, hinting at the curious intersections of fiction and reality that underpin the present inquiry.

Moving beyond traditional sources, the researchers have also considered unconventional avenues of inquiry, including the analysis of public reception data from soap opera forums and the perusal of communal musings garnered from social media platforms. The eclectic nature of these sources has provided a panoramic view of popular discourse surrounding "Days of Our Lives," supplementing the quantitative analysis with qualitative inferences that accentuate the comedic and enigmatic dimensions of the investigation.

In a whimsical nod to the pursuit of unconventional knowledge, the researchers have taken a lighthearted approach by perusing the allegorical musings of fictional characters in the soap opera genre, leveraging the idiosyncratic wit and wisdom embedded in the melodramatic narratives. While this unorthodox methodology may raise eyebrows, it has offered a distinct vantage point from which to contemplate the entanglement of televised drama and criminal stratagems, infusing a dash of levity into the academic pursuit.

As the narrative of this literature review unfolds, it becomes evident that the interplay between scholarly discourse, popular culture, and unorthodox data sources has shaped the multifaceted lens through which the correlation between "Days of Our Lives" viewership and burglaries in Colorado is scrutinized. Embracing the unexpected and blurring the boundaries between conventional research and whimsical exploration, this literature review sets the stage for the ensuing statistical analysis, where the nuances of this improbable relationship are unmasked with both rigor and amusement.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and Wikipedia . You used data from 1985 to 2021

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.

[[INTRODUCTION]]
The relationship between television programming and societal behavior has long been a subject of fascination and speculation. From debates over the impact of violent media on aggression to the influence of reality television on social norms, the connection between what we watch and how we act has been a topic of perennial interest. Our study delves into this complex relationship by examining the peculiar correlation between the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives," a beloved soap opera that has captured the hearts of audiences for decades, and the incidences of burglaries in the state of Colorado.
As researchers, we find ourselves in the midst of a narrative worthy of its own soap opera. It is a saga of data analysis, statistical scrutiny, and unexpected plot twists that lead us to a conclusion both surprising and thought-provoking. While our investigation may initially sound like the setup for a punchline, the statistical evidence we have uncovered is no laughing matter, although we certainly found the results to be quite comical. However, we approach this investigation with the utmost seriousness, understanding the importance of providing evidence-based insights, even if they are delivered with a touch of whimsy.
The choice of "Days of Our Lives" as the focal point of our analysis may raise an eyebrow or two, but we selected this show for its enduring popularity and cultural influence. Indeed, the intertwining storylines of love, betrayal, and familial drama have captivated audiences for over half a century. Yet, one would hardly expect this daytime drama to have any bearing on criminal activity, particularly burglaries. It is precisely this contrarian assumption that prompted our rigorous investigation, and we invite readers to join us in unraveling the mystery behind this seemingly improbable connection.
At the heart of our study is an extensive analysis of data sourced from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, providing a comprehensive account of reported burglaries in Colorado spanning several decades. Alongside this, we meticulously compiled viewership data for "Days of Our Lives" from the open source platform Wikipedia, crafting a timeline that mirrors the dramatic arcs of both the soap opera and, it seems, the criminal activities in the state. Our initial exploration led us to an unexpected revelation: a correlation that defied conventional wisdom, showcasing the serendipitous kinship between daytime drama and criminal misadventure.
In the following sections, we present the fruits of our labor in statistical analysis, examining the robustness of the correlation and exploring potential factors that may underpin this curious relationship. As we weave through the fabric of our findings, we encourage readers to indulge in the bewildering amusement of our results, challenging preconceived notions and embracing the delightful enigma that is the intersection of televised melodrama and real-world malfeasance. While our investigation may raise some eyebrows, we trust that the evidence we present will give researchers and enthusiasts alike ample fodder for contemplation and, perhaps, a chuckle or two.
The lure of the unexpected often brings the most captivating narratives to our attention, and our study is no exception. With an earnest yet undeniably whimsical approach, we invite readers to embark on this academic journey, wherein the mundane is transformed into a remarkable tale of correlation, curiosity, and a touch of the absurd. The curtain has risen on our investigation, and the stage is set for a performance that promises to captivate, entertain, and, ultimately, elicit a wry smile from those who dare to partake in the peculiar dynamics of our findings.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]



ChatGPT:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

Our investigation into the confounding link between the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives" and the occurrences of burglaries in the state of Colorado employed a blend of robust data collection and rigorous statistical analysis. The data collection process was as intricate as a daytime soap opera plot, involving careful extraction of information from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the ostensibly reliable, yet sometimes whimsical, pages of Wikipedia. We aimed to encompass a substantial timeframe, spanning from 1985 to 2021, ensuring that our analysis encapsulated the ebb and flow of both televised drama and criminal activities throughout the years.

The first step in our methodology involved cataloging the reported incidences of burglaries in Colorado from the voluminous databanks of the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services. This formidable task necessitated sifting through copious records and filtering out extraneous data with all the precision of a seasoned detective. Our pursuit of accurate and comprehensive data on burglaries ensured that no stone was left unturned, and no unexpected twist in the data escaped our discerning gaze.

Simultaneously, we ventured into the labyrinthine corridors of Wikipedia, extracting viewership data for "Days of Our Lives" with the diligence of an enthusiastic soap opera fan meticulously chronicling each episode. This involved navigating the occasionally murky waters of open-source platforms, wherein the veracity of information can rival the convoluted plotlines of the very soap opera we were investigating. Despite the potential for misinformation, we remained vigilant in our data collection, cross-referencing and validating each entry to ascertain its credibility and reliability.

With our expansive dataset in hand, we proceeded to perform a range of statistical analyses to unearth any semblance of correlation between these ostensibly disparate elements. Our application of rigorous statistical methods was as rigorous as a daytime soap opera character's moral compass, employing sophisticated techniques such as Pearson correlation coefficients, and time-series analysis to decipher the hidden patterns lurking within the data. We proudly present the findings of our methodical exploration in the subsequent section, where the convergence of melodrama and criminal mischief unveils itself with all the dramatic flair of a compelling soap opera cliffhanger.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and Wikipedia .

For the time period 1985 to 2021, you found a correlation 0.9108672, r-squared of 0.8296791, and p < 0.01.

One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
"The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.

-------

And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
The relationship between television programming and societal behavior has long been a subject of fascination and speculation. From debates over the impact of violent media on aggression to the influence of reality television on social norms, the connection between what we watch and how we act has been a topic of perennial interest. Our study delves into this complex relationship by examining the peculiar correlation between the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives," a beloved soap opera that has captured the hearts of audiences for decades, and the incidences of burglaries in the state of Colorado.
As researchers, we find ourselves in the midst of a narrative worthy of its own soap opera. It is a saga of data analysis, statistical scrutiny, and unexpected plot twists that lead us to a conclusion both surprising and thought-provoking. While our investigation may initially sound like the setup for a punchline, the statistical evidence we have uncovered is no laughing matter, although we certainly found the results to be quite comical. However, we approach this investigation with the utmost seriousness, understanding the importance of providing evidence-based insights, even if they are delivered with a touch of whimsy.
The choice of "Days of Our Lives" as the focal point of our analysis may raise an eyebrow or two, but we selected this show for its enduring popularity and cultural influence. Indeed, the intertwining storylines of love, betrayal, and familial drama have captivated audiences for over half a century. Yet, one would hardly expect this daytime drama to have any bearing on criminal activity, particularly burglaries. It is precisely this contrarian assumption that prompted our rigorous investigation, and we invite readers to join us in unraveling the mystery behind this seemingly improbable connection.
At the heart of our study is an extensive analysis of data sourced from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, providing a comprehensive account of reported burglaries in Colorado spanning several decades. Alongside this, we meticulously compiled viewership data for "Days of Our Lives" from the open source platform Wikipedia, crafting a timeline that mirrors the dramatic arcs of both the soap opera and, it seems, the criminal activities in the state. Our initial exploration led us to an unexpected revelation: a correlation that defied conventional wisdom, showcasing the serendipitous kinship between daytime drama and criminal misadventure.
In the following sections, we present the fruits of our labor in statistical analysis, examining the robustness of the correlation and exploring potential factors that may underpin this curious relationship. As we weave through the fabric of our findings, we encourage readers to indulge in the bewildering amusement of our results, challenging preconceived notions and embracing the delightful enigma that is the intersection of televised melodrama and real-world malfeasance. While our investigation may raise some eyebrows, we trust that the evidence we present will give researchers and enthusiasts alike ample fodder for contemplation and, perhaps, a chuckle or two.
The lure of the unexpected often brings the most captivating narratives to our attention, and our study is no exception. With an earnest yet undeniably whimsical approach, we invite readers to embark on this academic journey, wherein the mundane is transformed into a remarkable tale of correlation, curiosity, and a touch of the absurd. The curtain has risen on our investigation, and the stage is set for a performance that promises to captivate, entertain, and, ultimately, elicit a wry smile from those who dare to partake in the peculiar dynamics of our findings.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[RESULTS]]



ChatGPT:

[[RESULTS]]

The statistical analysis revealed a remarkably strong correlation between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives" over the period of 1985 to 2021. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 indicates a robust positive relationship between these two seemingly disparate variables. Additionally, the r-squared value of 0.8296791 suggests that approximately 83% of the variability in burglaries can be explained by the viewership of the soap opera. The p-value being less than 0.01 further supports the statistical significance of this association.

Figure 1 provides a visual representation of the relationship, showcasing the striking alignment between the fluctuations in viewership of "Days of Our Lives" and the occurrences of burglaries in Colorado. The scatterplot portrays a narrative that is both captivating and confounding, revealing a correlation that defies conventional expectations.

These findings offer an intriguing twist in the ongoing saga of academic inquiry, unraveling an unexpected connection that transcends the boundaries of typical research investigations. The implications of this correlation prompt contemplation of the complex interplay between television viewership and real-world behavior. While one might assume that a daytime drama would primarily influence emotions and daily life choices, our results unveil a compelling statistical undercurrent that links televised melodrama to criminal activities.

Despite the seemingly whimsical premise of our investigation, the statistical evidence accentuates the gravity of this correlation, highlighting the interwoven nature of societal influences. The serendipitous kinship between the fictional narratives portrayed on screen and the tangible occurrences of burglaries in Colorado underscores the intricate dynamics that permeate our everyday experiences.

This unexpected correlation invites further exploration into the underlying mechanisms and potential causal pathways that may drive such a connection. While this study may initially evoke a lighthearted chuckle, it ultimately serves as a testament to the multifaceted nature of human behavior and the unanticipated influences that shape our society.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
"The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
The connections between seemingly incongruent phenomena have long fascinated researchers, prompting investigation into the most unexpected correlations. This literature review seeks to contextualize the intricate relationship between television programming and societal behavior, specifically focusing on the surprising association between the viewership count for the soap opera "Days of Our Lives" and the incidence of burglaries in the state of Colorado. While this inquiry may initially appear unconventional, the statistical evidence presented in this paper compels a thorough examination of this curious convergence.
In "Smith et al.," the authors have examined the broader impact of television programming on viewer behavior, highlighting the ways in which media consumption can influence social attitudes and actions. The findings of this study lay the groundwork for understanding the potential influence of televised content on real-world activities, setting the stage for the unconventional investigation at hand. Similarly, "Doe and Jones" have explored the psychological mechanisms underlying audience engagement with soap operas, delving into the emotional resonance and cognitive processing that shape viewer responses. These insights offer a lens through which to consider the impact of "Days of Our Lives" on its audience, hinting at the potential for broader societal repercussions.
Expanding beyond the realm of academic literature, non-fiction works such as "The Economics of Television" by John Smith and "Crime and Media" by Jane Doe provide a broader understanding of the economic and sociological dimensions of media effects. While these texts do not directly address the specific relationship under scrutiny, they offer foundational knowledge that informs the interdisciplinary nature of this investigation.
In the realm of fiction, the narrative allure of daytime dramas has been immortalized in literary works such as "Love and Larceny: A Soap Opera Mystery" by Emily Jones and "The Burglar's Betrayal" by Sarah Doe. While these novels may not offer empirical insights, they capture the thematic resonance of soap operas and criminal misadventures, hinting at the curious intersections of fiction and reality that underpin the present inquiry.
Moving beyond traditional sources, the researchers have also considered unconventional avenues of inquiry, including the analysis of public reception data from soap opera forums and the perusal of communal musings garnered from social media platforms. The eclectic nature of these sources has provided a panoramic view of popular discourse surrounding "Days of Our Lives," supplementing the quantitative analysis with qualitative inferences that accentuate the comedic and enigmatic dimensions of the investigation.
In a whimsical nod to the pursuit of unconventional knowledge, the researchers have taken a lighthearted approach by perusing the allegorical musings of fictional characters in the soap opera genre, leveraging the idiosyncratic wit and wisdom embedded in the melodramatic narratives. While this unorthodox methodology may raise eyebrows, it has offered a distinct vantage point from which to contemplate the entanglement of televised drama and criminal stratagems, infusing a dash of levity into the academic pursuit.
As the narrative of this literature review unfolds, it becomes evident that the interplay between scholarly discourse, popular culture, and unorthodox data sources has shaped the multifaceted lens through which the correlation between "Days of Our Lives" viewership and burglaries in Colorado is scrutinized. Embracing the unexpected and blurring the boundaries between conventional research and whimsical exploration, this literature review sets the stage for the ensuing statistical analysis, where the nuances of this improbable relationship are unmasked with both rigor and amusement.

[[RESULTS]]
The statistical analysis revealed a remarkably strong correlation between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives" over the period of 1985 to 2021. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 indicates a robust positive relationship between these two seemingly disparate variables. Additionally, the r-squared value of 0.8296791 suggests that approximately 83% of the variability in burglaries can be explained by the viewership of the soap opera. The p-value being less than 0.01 further supports the statistical significance of this association.
Figure 1 provides a visual representation of the relationship, showcasing the striking alignment between the fluctuations in viewership of "Days of Our Lives" and the occurrences of burglaries in Colorado. The scatterplot portrays a narrative that is both captivating and confounding, revealing a correlation that defies conventional expectations.
These findings offer an intriguing twist in the ongoing saga of academic inquiry, unraveling an unexpected connection that transcends the boundaries of typical research investigations. The implications of this correlation prompt contemplation of the complex interplay between television viewership and real-world behavior. While one might assume that a daytime drama would primarily influence emotions and daily life choices, our results unveil a compelling statistical undercurrent that links televised melodrama to criminal activities.
Despite the seemingly whimsical premise of our investigation, the statistical evidence accentuates the gravity of this correlation, highlighting the interwoven nature of societal influences. The serendipitous kinship between the fictional narratives portrayed on screen and the tangible occurrences of burglaries in Colorado underscores the intricate dynamics that permeate our everyday experiences.
This unexpected correlation invites further exploration into the underlying mechanisms and potential causal pathways that may drive such a connection. While this study may initially evoke a lighthearted chuckle, it ultimately serves as a testament to the multifaceted nature of human behavior and the unanticipated influences that shape our society.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

The findings of our investigation have shed light on the unexpectedly robust and statistically significant correlation between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the longstanding soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Our results resonate with prior research, showing support for the notion that seemingly unrelated phenomena may indeed exhibit intriguing connections.

The statistical evidence presented in this study aligns with the broader literature on media effects and societal behavior. Our results corroborate the work of Smith et al., who have delved into the broader impact of television programming on viewer behavior. While the focus of our study may seem unconventional, the substantial correlation coefficient and r-squared value underscore the compelling association between televised content and real-world activities, reinforcing the notion that media consumption can wield substantial influence.

Moreover, our findings resonate with the nuanced exploration of emotional resonance and cognitive processing in audience engagement with soap operas, as illuminated by Doe and Jones. The statistically significant correlation observed in our study provides quantitative validation of the potential for televised dramas to manifest broader societal repercussions, adding a dimension of empirical support to the emotional and cognitive mechanisms proposed in prior research.

The juxtaposition of "The Economics of Television" by John Smith and "Crime and Media" by Jane Doe, while not directly addressing our specific inquiry, underscores the interdisciplinary nature of our investigation. This juxtaposition serves as a subtle reminder of the potential economic and sociological dimensions underlying the relationship between media content and societal behavior, lending further weight to the unexpected convergence under scrutiny.

In a playful nod to our unconventional pursuit of knowledge, we draw attention to the allegorical musings of fictional characters in the soap opera genre as an unconventional, albeit insightful, source of perspective. While these musings may be whimsical, they serve as a whimsical reminder that the exploration of unconventional data sources can yield surprising illuminations, underscoring the mix of levity and ambition that has punctuated our investigative journey.

The robust correlation uncovered in our study challenges conventional perspectives, suggesting that the sway of televised melodrama extends beyond emotional responses to potentially exert an intriguing influence on criminal activities. While the initial premise of our investigation may prompt a lighthearted chuckle, the statistical undercurrent of this correlation delves into the complex interplay between televised narratives and tangible societal occurrences, inviting further contemplation and investigation.

In essence, this study serves as a testament to the labyrinthine nature of human behavior, embracing the unexpected and illuminating the enigmatic connections that permeate our societal fabric. The correlations unveiled in this research not only contribute to the conversation on media effects but also underscore the need for interdisciplinary exploration and the willingness to engage with unconventional inquiries.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a witty academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a statistics journal.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between Burglaries in Colorado and Viewership count for Days of Our Lives. Make it seem dry like academic research paper, but with lots of subtle hidden offhand remarks, jokes, goofy observations, and puns. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
"The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado"

[[ABSTRACT]]
This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.

[[INTRDUCTION]]
The relationship between television programming and societal behavior has long been a subject of fascination and speculation. From debates over the impact of violent media on aggression to the influence of reality television on social norms, the connection between what we watch and how we act has been a topic of perennial interest. Our study delves into this complex relationship by examining the peculiar correlation between the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives," a beloved soap opera that has captured the hearts of audiences for decades, and the incidences of burglaries in the state of Colorado.
As researchers, we find ourselves in the midst of a narrative worthy of its own soap opera. It is a saga of data analysis, statistical scrutiny, and unexpected plot twists that lead us to a conclusion both surprising and thought-provoking. While our investigation may initially sound like the setup for a punchline, the statistical evidence we have uncovered is no laughing matter, although we certainly found the results to be quite comical. However, we approach this investigation with the utmost seriousness, understanding the importance of providing evidence-based insights, even if they are delivered with a touch of whimsy.
The choice of "Days of Our Lives" as the focal point of our analysis may raise an eyebrow or two, but we selected this show for its enduring popularity and cultural influence. Indeed, the intertwining storylines of love, betrayal, and familial drama have captivated audiences for over half a century. Yet, one would hardly expect this daytime drama to have any bearing on criminal activity, particularly burglaries. It is precisely this contrarian assumption that prompted our rigorous investigation, and we invite readers to join us in unraveling the mystery behind this seemingly improbable connection.
At the heart of our study is an extensive analysis of data sourced from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, providing a comprehensive account of reported burglaries in Colorado spanning several decades. Alongside this, we meticulously compiled viewership data for "Days of Our Lives" from the open source platform Wikipedia, crafting a timeline that mirrors the dramatic arcs of both the soap opera and, it seems, the criminal activities in the state. Our initial exploration led us to an unexpected revelation: a correlation that defied conventional wisdom, showcasing the serendipitous kinship between daytime drama and criminal misadventure.
In the following sections, we present the fruits of our labor in statistical analysis, examining the robustness of the correlation and exploring potential factors that may underpin this curious relationship. As we weave through the fabric of our findings, we encourage readers to indulge in the bewildering amusement of our results, challenging preconceived notions and embracing the delightful enigma that is the intersection of televised melodrama and real-world malfeasance. While our investigation may raise some eyebrows, we trust that the evidence we present will give researchers and enthusiasts alike ample fodder for contemplation and, perhaps, a chuckle or two.
The lure of the unexpected often brings the most captivating narratives to our attention, and our study is no exception. With an earnest yet undeniably whimsical approach, we invite readers to embark on this academic journey, wherein the mundane is transformed into a remarkable tale of correlation, curiosity, and a touch of the absurd. The curtain has risen on our investigation, and the stage is set for a performance that promises to captivate, entertain, and, ultimately, elicit a wry smile from those who dare to partake in the peculiar dynamics of our findings.

[[RESULTS]]
The statistical analysis revealed a remarkably strong correlation between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives" over the period of 1985 to 2021. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 indicates a robust positive relationship between these two seemingly disparate variables. Additionally, the r-squared value of 0.8296791 suggests that approximately 83% of the variability in burglaries can be explained by the viewership of the soap opera. The p-value being less than 0.01 further supports the statistical significance of this association.
Figure 1 provides a visual representation of the relationship, showcasing the striking alignment between the fluctuations in viewership of "Days of Our Lives" and the occurrences of burglaries in Colorado. The scatterplot portrays a narrative that is both captivating and confounding, revealing a correlation that defies conventional expectations.
These findings offer an intriguing twist in the ongoing saga of academic inquiry, unraveling an unexpected connection that transcends the boundaries of typical research investigations. The implications of this correlation prompt contemplation of the complex interplay between television viewership and real-world behavior. While one might assume that a daytime drama would primarily influence emotions and daily life choices, our results unveil a compelling statistical undercurrent that links televised melodrama to criminal activities.
Despite the seemingly whimsical premise of our investigation, the statistical evidence accentuates the gravity of this correlation, highlighting the interwoven nature of societal influences. The serendipitous kinship between the fictional narratives portrayed on screen and the tangible occurrences of burglaries in Colorado underscores the intricate dynamics that permeate our everyday experiences.
This unexpected correlation invites further exploration into the underlying mechanisms and potential causal pathways that may drive such a connection. While this study may initially evoke a lighthearted chuckle, it ultimately serves as a testament to the multifaceted nature of human behavior and the unanticipated influences that shape our society.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]



ChatGPT:

[[CONCLUSION]]
In conclusion, the enthralling saga of our research endeavor has unfolded, revealing a correlation that defies conventional expectations and provides fodder for contemplation and, perhaps, a wry smile or two. The robust positive relationship uncovered between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for "Days of Our Lives" from 1985 to 2021 has certainly turned the spotlight onto the unexpected connections that permeate our societal tapestry. Through meticulous statistical analysis, we have illuminated a storyline that intertwines daytime drama with real-world misadventure, captivating audiences in a manner befitting of the soap opera realm.

While our findings may prompt a chuckle at the curious juxtaposition of televised melodrama and criminal activity, it is essential to recognize the gravity of this correlation and its implications for understanding the intricate dynamics that shape human behavior. The statistical robustness of our results, underscored by a correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and a statistically significant p-value, invites further exploration into the underlying mechanisms that drive this unlikely association. The unexpected alliance between the fictional narratives depicted on screen and the tangible occurrences of burglaries in Colorado highlights the nuanced interplay between media consumption and real-world actions.

As we draw the curtain on this captivating performance of correlation and curiosity, we are left with an empirical riddle that both entertains and intrigues. The intertwining narratives of "Days of Our Lives" and the burglary occurrences in Colorado present a compelling enigma, inviting researchers to delve into the captivating web of influence that transcends the boundaries of traditional expectations. Although our investigation may have initially raised eyebrows, the statistical evidence that underpins this correlation demands thoughtful consideration, even in the face of its delightful absurdity.

It is with a touch of whimsy and a deep appreciation for statistical inquiry that we assert the culmination of our findings: no more research is needed in this area. The curtain has fallen on this riveting tale of correlation and the unexpected influences that color our societal landscape. As we bid adieu to this unlikely duo of daytime drama and criminal exploits, our study leaves behind a lingering echo of statistical whimsy and a testament to the captivating mysteries that underscore the complex interactions shaping our world.


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

Journal of Criminal Shenanigans


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

Society for the Advancement of Criminology and Criminal Justice Research


Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled The Days of Our Crimes: A Soap Opera of Burglaries in Colorado with an abstract of This paper aims to uncover the relationship between burglaries in Colorado and the viewership count for the long-running soap opera "Days of Our Lives." Through meticulous analysis of data acquired from the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services and the open source platform Wikipedia, our research team unveils the surprising correlation between these seemingly unrelated phenomena. The correlation coefficient of 0.9108672 and statistically significant p-value (p < 0.01) observed from 1985 to 2021 provides compelling evidence of a notable association. Additionally, this study discusses the potential underlying factors and implications, shedding light on the intricate interplay between televised drama and real-life criminal activity. Despite the seemingly preposterous nature of this investigation, the results offer a delightful twist and provoke contemplation of the curious influences that permeate our society.

ChatGPT:

"burglaries in Colorado", "Days of Our Lives viewership", "FBI Criminal Justice Information Services data", "Wikipedia data analysis", "correlation coefficient of criminal activity and soap opera viewership", "influence of televised drama on criminal activity", "relationship between soap operas and real-life crimes"

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.



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Data details

Burglaries in Colorado
Detailed data title: The burglary rate per 100,000 residents in Colorado
Source: FBI Criminal Justice Information Services
See what else correlates with Burglaries in Colorado

Viewership count for Days of Our Lives
Detailed data title: Metered viewership count for Days of Our Lives
Source: Wikipedia
See what else correlates with Viewership count for Days of Our Lives

Correlation r = 0.9108672 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r2 = 0.8296791 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 83% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Viewership count for Days of Our Lives) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., Burglaries in Colorado) over the 37 years from 1985 through 2021.

p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 5.2E-15. 0.0000000000000051541697058530
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme. More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.91 in 5.2E-13% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 194,017,670,559,899 random variables You don't actually need 194 trillion variables to find a correlation like this one. I don't have that many variables in my database. You can also correlate variables that are not independent. I do this a lot.

p-value calculations are useful for understanding the probability of a result happening by chance. They are most useful when used to highlight the risk of a fluke outcome. For example, if you calculate a p-value of 0.30, the risk that the result is a fluke is high. It is good to know that! But there are lots of ways to get a p-value of less than 0.01, as evidenced by this project.

In this particular case, the values are so extreme as to be meaningless. That's why no one reports p-values with specificity after they drop below 0.01.

Just to be clear: I'm being completely transparent about the calculations. There is no math trickery. This is just how statistics shakes out when you calculate hundreds of millions of random correlations.
with the same 36 degrees of freedom, Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 36 because we have two variables measured over a period of 37 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.83, 0.95 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!


All values for the years included above: If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.
1985198619871988198919901991199219931994199519961997199819992000200120022003200420052006200720082009201020112012201320142015201620172018201920202021
Burglaries in Colorado (Burglary rate)1748.11791.61534.61383.11250.41208.81158.31090.91009.8925.7934.1900.8796.1786.5665.1630.8643.9703.8712.3717.3745.1681.9589568530.1519502.8504.2475.6438.8431.1430.8402.7382.3351.9400.3420.4
Viewership count for Days of Our Lives (Nielson share)7200000700000071000006500000540000052000005400000490000056000005300000580000058000005100000580000042000003800000360000031000003100000270000026000002300000210000022000002200000200000020000002100000190000020500001800000160000016000001600000140000012000001200000




Why this works

  1. Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
  2. Lack of causal connection: There is probably Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
    no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
  3. Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
    p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.




Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."


# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([1748.1,1791.6,1534.6,1383.1,1250.4,1208.8,1158.3,1090.9,1009.8,925.7,934.1,900.8,796.1,786.5,665.1,630.8,643.9,703.8,712.3,717.3,745.1,681.9,589,568,530.1,519,502.8,504.2,475.6,438.8,431.1,430.8,402.7,382.3,351.9,400.3,420.4,])
array_2 = np.array([7200000,7000000,7100000,6500000,5400000,5200000,5400000,4900000,5600000,5300000,5800000,5800000,5100000,5800000,4200000,3800000,3600000,3100000,3100000,2700000,2600000,2300000,2100000,2200000,2200000,2000000,2000000,2100000,1900000,2050000,1800000,1600000,1600000,1600000,1400000,1200000,1200000,])
array_1_name = "Burglaries in Colorado"
array_2_name = "Viewership count for Days of Our Lives"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)



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You do not need to attribute "the spurious correlations website," and you don't even need to link here if you don't want to. I don't gain anything from pageviews. There are no ads on this site, there is nothing for sale, and I am not for hire.

For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

When spoken, my last name is pronounced "vegan," like I don't eat meat.

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Correlation ID: 2064 · Black Variable ID: 20132 · Red Variable ID: 87
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