Spurious correlation #1,491 · View random
A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is GMO use in cotton in California and the second variable is Google searches for 'i have a headache'. The chart goes from 2004 to 2022, and the two variables track closely in value over that time.

A linear line chart with years as the X-axis and two variables on the Y-axis. The first variable is GMO use in cotton in California and the second variable is Google searches for 'i have a headache'. The chart goes from 2004 to 2022, and the two variables track closely in value over that time.

Download png, svg

AI explanation

The GMO cotton was really sticking it to you, eh? As the cotton plants grew bigger and stronger, they were also releasing a new type of pest-erizing pollen. This pollen wasn't just a pain in the neck for bugs, but it also had an uncanny ability to gin up your headache frequency. It seems like the more the cotton grew, the more your headache problem seemed to be spinning out of control. Looks like you're not the only one experiencing a bit of a Monsanto-strosity in the form of a headache influx. Talk about a reaping what you sow situation, or should I say sewing what you're reaping?

^{Show image generation prompt} Model: dalle-3
Prompt: In a futuristic setting, visualize a vast cotton field in sunny California. A farmer tends to rows of luminescent genetically modified cotton plants, shimmering under the futuristic sunlight. In the nearby farmhouse, a person is seen connecting with a virtual interface, typing "I have a headache" into a holographic search panel projected from their sleek, high-tech computer. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.

This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the variables described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here are two variables: GMO use in cotton in California and Google searches for 'i have a headache'. Given these, which of the following image style descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: Cyberpunk a Polaroid photo Futuristic Art nouveau Vaporwave
ChatGPT: Futuristic

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated. You combine both variables into one scene.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that prominently depicts both GMO use in cotton in California and Google searches for 'i have a headache' together. Keep the description simple.
ChatGPT: In a vast cotton field in sunny California, a farmer tends to rows of genetically modified cotton plants. In the nearby farmhouse, a person is seen sitting at a computer, typing "I have a headache" into the Google search bar.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ Futuristic ] and depicting this scene: In a vast cotton field in sunny California, a farmer tends to rows of genetically modified cotton plants. In the nearby farmhouse, a person is seen sitting at a computer, typing "I have a headache" into the Google search bar. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: In a futuristic setting, visualize a vast cotton field in sunny California. A farmer tends to rows of luminescent genetically modified cotton plants, shimmering under the futuristic sunlight. In the nearby farmhouse, a person is seen connecting with a virtual interface, typing "I have a headache" into a holographic search panel projected from their sleek, high-tech computer.

*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.

I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.
^{Show prompt for explanation} Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106 (fine-tuned)
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how an increase in GMO use in cotton in California caused i have a headache (Google searches for 'i have a headache') to increase. Include one good pun.

AI academic paper

(Because p < 0.01)

A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'

The Journal of Amusing Anomalies in Agriculture and Internet Behavior

Jan 2024

Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real!

^{Show prompt used to generate this paper} Quick note: This sequence is long and repetitive. That's how the prompt engineering works for this one. I manage the output in Python to format it into this PDF.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton in California and Google searches for 'i have a headache'. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.

Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.

Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.

Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then you might move on to cartoons and children's shows that you watched for research.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'

[[ABSTRACT]]
Headaches have long been a ubiquitous ailment plaguing mankind, causing discomfort and grumblings across the globe. In this study, we delve into the unusual relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and the frequency of Google searches for 'I have a headache'. While some may dismiss this correlation as a mere coincidence, we've delved deep into the data and uncovered some unexpectedly compelling findings.

Applying a statistical approach rigorous enough to satisfy even the most resistant academic, we analyzed USDA data and Google Trends to scrutinize the temporal trends from 2004 to 2022. Unexpectedly, our findings revealed a robust correlation, with a coefficient of 0.9673191 and p < 0.01, between the adoption of GMOs in cotton production and the surge in Internet queries related to headaches. That's a correlation tighter than a pair of compression socks on a marathon runner!

This peculiar association suggests a fascinating link between agricultural practices and public health, raising intriguing questions that demand our attention. Could the introduction of GMOs in cotton be causing an uptick in headaches? Or is the prevalence of headaches coincidentally synchronized with the proliferation of genetically modified cotton? The mysteries abound like a flock of seagulls at a beachside french fry stand.

Our research contributes to the growing body of evidence exploring the potential impacts of GMOs on public health, calling for further investigation into the unintended consequences of genetic tinkering in agriculture. So next time you're reaching for that aspirin, you might want to ponder the potential influence of genetically modified cotton on your headache. After all, a little extra humor never hurts - unless the punchline is too forced!

-------

And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
From ancient times to the present day, headaches have plagued humanity, eliciting groans and requests for aspirin in countless languages. Perhaps it's the cosmos' way of reminding us to take a break or maybe just a side effect of living in a rapidly changing world. But what if there was a connection between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton farming and the surge in Google searches for 'I have a headache'? It may sound as unlikely as finding a vegetable joke funny, but our research aims to shed light on this intriguing correlation.
In recent years, the widespread adoption of GMOs in cotton farming has transformed agricultural practices, promising increased yields and pest resistance. Yet, as our study reveals, it's not all sunshine and daisies. Our analysis reaches deep into the fertile soil of data to unearth an unexpected correlation, captivating even the most steadfast skeptics—like a stubborn mule intrigued by a dangling carrot.
The statistical analysis, conducted with all the seriousness that befits academic research, shows a remarkable relationship with a coefficient tighter than a constrictor's hug and significance levels so low they'd make a limbo dancer jealous. It's a connection that demands attention, much like a dad joke at a family gathering.
This curious correlation raises thought-provoking questions that have the potential to uproot long-held assumptions about farming practices and their unforeseen impact on public health. As we delve into this uncharted territory, we invite fellow researchers to join us in satiating curiosity, much like a kindred spirit seeking out the punchline of a well-crafted dad joke.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]

The potential impact of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) on public health has spurred considerable interest in the scientific community. Smith et al. (2018), in their seminal work, "Genetic Modification in Agriculture: Implications for Human Health," delved into the intricate web of connections between GMOs and various health outcomes. Meanwhile, Doe and Jones (2015) investigated the use of GMOs in cotton cultivation and its environmental ramifications in "GMOs and Sustainable Agriculture: A Comprehensive Analysis."

But let's step away from the serious academia for a moment and dive into some literature that's a little less dry than the California weather. How about "The Omnivore's Dilemma" by Michael Pollan? Sure, it's not directly related to cotton or headaches, but it's got GMOs and agriculture in there somewhere. And if we're talking about unexpected consequences, who can forget "Jurassic Park" by Michael Crichton? Life found a way, and headaches might too!

Now, you might think we've strayed too far, but hold on a second. As responsible researchers, we've also delved into the world of children's programming for relevant insights. Remember that episode of "Arthur" where D.W. complained of a headache after a day at the farm? Coincidence? Maybe not. And what about "SpongeBob SquarePants"? Bet you didn't know there's an episode where he tries to grow genetically modified sea tomatoes. It's called "Kelp-O." Okay, that last one's a stretch, but we had to include it for the pun potential.

Returning to more serious matters, the relationship between GMOs in cotton and public health outcomes is a topic that demands continued investigation. As we navigate through this grove of interconnected data, it's crucial to approach the matter with the precision of a surgeon and the humor of a stand-up comedian—because sometimes, the best insights come from the most unexpected places.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton in California and Google searches for 'i have a headache'. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from USDA and Google Trends . You used data from 2004 to 2022

Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.

Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'

[[ABSTRACT]]
Headaches have long been a ubiquitous ailment plaguing mankind, causing discomfort and grumblings across the globe. In this study, we delve into the unusual relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and the frequency of Google searches for 'I have a headache'. While some may dismiss this correlation as a mere coincidence, we've delved deep into the data and uncovered some unexpectedly compelling findings.

Applying a statistical approach rigorous enough to satisfy even the most resistant academic, we analyzed USDA data and Google Trends to scrutinize the temporal trends from 2004 to 2022. Unexpectedly, our findings revealed a robust correlation, with a coefficient of 0.9673191 and p < 0.01, between the adoption of GMOs in cotton production and the surge in Internet queries related to headaches. That's a correlation tighter than a pair of compression socks on a marathon runner!

This peculiar association suggests a fascinating link between agricultural practices and public health, raising intriguing questions that demand our attention. Could the introduction of GMOs in cotton be causing an uptick in headaches? Or is the prevalence of headaches coincidentally synchronized with the proliferation of genetically modified cotton? The mysteries abound like a flock of seagulls at a beachside french fry stand.

Our research contributes to the growing body of evidence exploring the potential impacts of GMOs on public health, calling for further investigation into the unintended consequences of genetic tinkering in agriculture. So next time you're reaching for that aspirin, you might want to ponder the potential influence of genetically modified cotton on your headache. After all, a little extra humor never hurts - unless the punchline is too forced!

[[INTRODUCTION]]
From ancient times to the present day, headaches have plagued humanity, eliciting groans and requests for aspirin in countless languages. Perhaps it's the cosmos' way of reminding us to take a break or maybe just a side effect of living in a rapidly changing world. But what if there was a connection between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton farming and the surge in Google searches for 'I have a headache'? It may sound as unlikely as finding a vegetable joke funny, but our research aims to shed light on this intriguing correlation.
In recent years, the widespread adoption of GMOs in cotton farming has transformed agricultural practices, promising increased yields and pest resistance. Yet, as our study reveals, it's not all sunshine and daisies. Our analysis reaches deep into the fertile soil of data to unearth an unexpected correlation, captivating even the most steadfast skeptics—like a stubborn mule intrigued by a dangling carrot.
The statistical analysis, conducted with all the seriousness that befits academic research, shows a remarkable relationship with a coefficient tighter than a constrictor's hug and significance levels so low they'd make a limbo dancer jealous. It's a connection that demands attention, much like a dad joke at a family gathering.
This curious correlation raises thought-provoking questions that have the potential to uproot long-held assumptions about farming practices and their unforeseen impact on public health. As we delve into this uncharted territory, we invite fellow researchers to join us in satiating curiosity, much like a kindred spirit seeking out the punchline of a well-crafted dad joke.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

ChatGPT:

[[METHODOLOGY]]

To untangle the mysterious link between genetically modified cotton and the surge in Google searches for 'I have a headache', our research team employed a methodology as precise and thorough as a master chef measuring ingredients for a delicate soufflé. We sourced data from the United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) to track the adoption of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation across California from 2004 to 2022. As we embarked on this data journey, we ensured that our processes were as airtight as a pickle jar - no room for data contamination here!

In parallel, we turned to the vast expanse of Google Trends, utilizing its search volume index for the key phrase 'i have a headache' from 2004 to 2022. Analyzing this search term over time, we navigated through the peaks and valleys of headache-related inquiries with a steady hand, much like a seasoned sailor navigating stormy seas - though with significantly less excitement.

Our analytical approach involved a thorough examination of the temporal trends, with a statistical rigor akin to the precision of a Swiss watchmaker. We meticulously assessed the congruence of changes in GMO adoption and the frequency of Google searches for headache-related terms, using mathematical techniques worthy of the greatest mathematical minds—Euler, Gauss, and of course, the unsung hero of algebraic dad jokes.

To quantify the strength of the relationship, we employed Pearson's correlation coefficient, seeking the level of association between the two variables with a diligence that could rival that of a determined bloodhound on a scent. This coefficient, expressed as a numeric value, served as our guiding star, indicating the degree of correlation between GMO use in cotton and the prevalence of headache-related Google searches. We have to say, finding a stronger association would be rarer than finding a four-leaf clover in a field of three-leaf clovers, or in other words, highly improbable.

Additionally, we conducted a series of time series analyses to further scrutinize the patterns of both GMO adoption and headache-related search volumes, aiming to distill the complexities of these datasets into actionable insights. This involved employing sophisticated mathematical models, complete with the intricate complexities akin to solving a Rubik's Cube blindfolded - a puzzle not for the faint of heart, but we were up to the challenge.

Our team was acutely aware of the potential limitations inherent in observational studies and the risk of spurious correlations, rocking the boat of scientific inquiry like an enthusiastic but cautious sailor. Therefore, we adhered to meticulous methodologies, ensuring that our findings were as robust as a well-engineered bridge, capable of withstanding even the weight of the most groan-inducing dad jokes.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton in California and Google searches for 'i have a headache'. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from USDA and Google Trends .

For the time period 2004 to 2022, you found a correlation 0.9673191, r-squared of 0.9357063, and p < 0.01.

One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.

Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'

[[ABSTRACT]]
Headaches have long been a ubiquitous ailment plaguing mankind, causing discomfort and grumblings across the globe. In this study, we delve into the unusual relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and the frequency of Google searches for 'I have a headache'. While some may dismiss this correlation as a mere coincidence, we've delved deep into the data and uncovered some unexpectedly compelling findings.

Applying a statistical approach rigorous enough to satisfy even the most resistant academic, we analyzed USDA data and Google Trends to scrutinize the temporal trends from 2004 to 2022. Unexpectedly, our findings revealed a robust correlation, with a coefficient of 0.9673191 and p < 0.01, between the adoption of GMOs in cotton production and the surge in Internet queries related to headaches. That's a correlation tighter than a pair of compression socks on a marathon runner!

This peculiar association suggests a fascinating link between agricultural practices and public health, raising intriguing questions that demand our attention. Could the introduction of GMOs in cotton be causing an uptick in headaches? Or is the prevalence of headaches coincidentally synchronized with the proliferation of genetically modified cotton? The mysteries abound like a flock of seagulls at a beachside french fry stand.

Our research contributes to the growing body of evidence exploring the potential impacts of GMOs on public health, calling for further investigation into the unintended consequences of genetic tinkering in agriculture. So next time you're reaching for that aspirin, you might want to ponder the potential influence of genetically modified cotton on your headache. After all, a little extra humor never hurts - unless the punchline is too forced!

-------

And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
From ancient times to the present day, headaches have plagued humanity, eliciting groans and requests for aspirin in countless languages. Perhaps it's the cosmos' way of reminding us to take a break or maybe just a side effect of living in a rapidly changing world. But what if there was a connection between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton farming and the surge in Google searches for 'I have a headache'? It may sound as unlikely as finding a vegetable joke funny, but our research aims to shed light on this intriguing correlation.
In recent years, the widespread adoption of GMOs in cotton farming has transformed agricultural practices, promising increased yields and pest resistance. Yet, as our study reveals, it's not all sunshine and daisies. Our analysis reaches deep into the fertile soil of data to unearth an unexpected correlation, captivating even the most steadfast skeptics—like a stubborn mule intrigued by a dangling carrot.
The statistical analysis, conducted with all the seriousness that befits academic research, shows a remarkable relationship with a coefficient tighter than a constrictor's hug and significance levels so low they'd make a limbo dancer jealous. It's a connection that demands attention, much like a dad joke at a family gathering.
This curious correlation raises thought-provoking questions that have the potential to uproot long-held assumptions about farming practices and their unforeseen impact on public health. As we delve into this uncharted territory, we invite fellow researchers to join us in satiating curiosity, much like a kindred spirit seeking out the punchline of a well-crafted dad joke.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[RESULTS]]

ChatGPT:

[[RESULTS]]

The analysis of the data from 2004 to 2022 revealed a striking correlation (r = 0.9673191) between the adoption of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and an increase in Google searches for 'I have a headache'. The relationship exhibited a high degree of explanatory power, with an r-squared value of 0.9357063, emphasizing the robustness of the association. It's as if these variables were peanut butter and jelly—undoubtedly, statistically sweet together!

The strength and significance of this relationship underscore the potential implications of GMO use in agriculture on public well-being. We've delved into this unexpected connection as thoroughly as a dad explaining a pun, scrutinizing every data point and statistical measure to ensure the rigor and reliability of our findings.

The figure (Fig. 1) illustrates the tight correlation between GMO adoption in cotton farming and the frequency of Google searches for headaches. This visual representation highlights the conspicuous pattern that emerged from our analysis, providing a succinct snapshot of the striking association we uncovered. Just like a well-timed punchline, this scatterplot truly draws the eye!

These unanticipated results prompt further inquiry into the potential impacts of genetically modified cotton on human health. While the exact nature of this correlation remains shrouded in mystery, our findings spark contemplation about the interplay between agricultural practices and public health outcomes. It's as if we've stumbled upon a punchline that leaves us chuckling and pondering long after it's been delivered.

Our research sheds a unique light on the potential repercussions of GMOs in the agricultural landscape, inviting further investigation and discussion to unravel this intriguing connection. After all, a good academic paper, much like a dad joke, leaves a lasting impression and invites others to join in the conversation.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton in California and Google searches for 'i have a headache'. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 500 tokens.

Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.

Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.

[[TITLE]]
A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'

[[ABSTRACT]]
Headaches have long been a ubiquitous ailment plaguing mankind, causing discomfort and grumblings across the globe. In this study, we delve into the unusual relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and the frequency of Google searches for 'I have a headache'. While some may dismiss this correlation as a mere coincidence, we've delved deep into the data and uncovered some unexpectedly compelling findings.

Applying a statistical approach rigorous enough to satisfy even the most resistant academic, we analyzed USDA data and Google Trends to scrutinize the temporal trends from 2004 to 2022. Unexpectedly, our findings revealed a robust correlation, with a coefficient of 0.9673191 and p < 0.01, between the adoption of GMOs in cotton production and the surge in Internet queries related to headaches. That's a correlation tighter than a pair of compression socks on a marathon runner!

This peculiar association suggests a fascinating link between agricultural practices and public health, raising intriguing questions that demand our attention. Could the introduction of GMOs in cotton be causing an uptick in headaches? Or is the prevalence of headaches coincidentally synchronized with the proliferation of genetically modified cotton? The mysteries abound like a flock of seagulls at a beachside french fry stand.

Our research contributes to the growing body of evidence exploring the potential impacts of GMOs on public health, calling for further investigation into the unintended consequences of genetic tinkering in agriculture. So next time you're reaching for that aspirin, you might want to ponder the potential influence of genetically modified cotton on your headache. After all, a little extra humor never hurts - unless the punchline is too forced!

[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
The potential impact of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) on public health has spurred considerable interest in the scientific community. Smith et al. (2018), in their seminal work, "Genetic Modification in Agriculture: Implications for Human Health," delved into the intricate web of connections between GMOs and various health outcomes. Meanwhile, Doe and Jones (2015) investigated the use of GMOs in cotton cultivation and its environmental ramifications in "GMOs and Sustainable Agriculture: A Comprehensive Analysis."
But let's step away from the serious academia for a moment and dive into some literature that's a little less dry than the California weather. How about "The Omnivore's Dilemma" by Michael Pollan? Sure, it's not directly related to cotton or headaches, but it's got GMOs and agriculture in there somewhere. And if we're talking about unexpected consequences, who can forget "Jurassic Park" by Michael Crichton? Life found a way, and headaches might too!
Now, you might think we've strayed too far, but hold on a second. As responsible researchers, we've also delved into the world of children's programming for relevant insights. Remember that episode of "Arthur" where D.W. complained of a headache after a day at the farm? Coincidence? Maybe not. And what about "SpongeBob SquarePants"? Bet you didn't know there's an episode where he tries to grow genetically modified sea tomatoes. It's called "Kelp-O." Okay, that last one's a stretch, but we had to include it for the pun potential.
Returning to more serious matters, the relationship between GMOs in cotton and public health outcomes is a topic that demands continued investigation. As we navigate through this grove of interconnected data, it's crucial to approach the matter with the precision of a surgeon and the humor of a stand-up comedian—because sometimes, the best insights come from the most unexpected places.

[[RESULTS]]
The analysis of the data from 2004 to 2022 revealed a striking correlation (r = 0.9673191) between the adoption of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and an increase in Google searches for 'I have a headache'. The relationship exhibited a high degree of explanatory power, with an r-squared value of 0.9357063, emphasizing the robustness of the association. It's as if these variables were peanut butter and jelly—undoubtedly, statistically sweet together!
The strength and significance of this relationship underscore the potential implications of GMO use in agriculture on public well-being. We've delved into this unexpected connection as thoroughly as a dad explaining a pun, scrutinizing every data point and statistical measure to ensure the rigor and reliability of our findings.
The figure (Fig. 1) illustrates the tight correlation between GMO adoption in cotton farming and the frequency of Google searches for headaches. This visual representation highlights the conspicuous pattern that emerged from our analysis, providing a succinct snapshot of the striking association we uncovered. Just like a well-timed punchline, this scatterplot truly draws the eye!
These unanticipated results prompt further inquiry into the potential impacts of genetically modified cotton on human health. While the exact nature of this correlation remains shrouded in mystery, our findings spark contemplation about the interplay between agricultural practices and public health outcomes. It's as if we've stumbled upon a punchline that leaves us chuckling and pondering long after it's been delivered.
Our research sheds a unique light on the potential repercussions of GMOs in the agricultural landscape, inviting further investigation and discussion to unravel this intriguing connection. After all, a good academic paper, much like a dad joke, leaves a lasting impression and invites others to join in the conversation.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[DISCUSSION]]

ChatGPT:

[[DISCUSSION]]

Our findings contribute to the growing body of research exploring the unexpected impact of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) on public health. The robust correlation between the use of GMOs in cotton cultivation in California and the surge in Google searches for 'I have a headache' underscores the need for further investigation into the potential unintended consequences of genetic engineering in agriculture. It seems GMOs are not only altering the genetic makeup of crops but also inspiring a lot of head-scratching—quite literally.

Our results align with previous research, including Smith et al. (2018), who highlighted the intricate connections between GMOs and human health. The tight correlation we observed reaffirms the significance of understanding the broader effects of agricultural practices on public well-being. It's as if these findings are the punchline to a long-winded setup, driving home the importance of taking a closer look at the implications of GMO use in cotton farming.

Coming back to the unexpected sources in the literature review, I must mention that the parallels we found with the experiences of D.W. from "Arthur" and SpongeBob's genetically modified sea tomatoes are striking. While their tales may seem whimsical, they serve as poignant reminders of the potential impact of agricultural innovation on our daily lives. And speaking of daily lives, many people seem to be searching 'i have a headache' daily, and our research hints that GMOs in cotton might have something to do with it.

The visual representation in the figure (Fig. 1) not only amplifies the strength of the correlation but also provides a clear illustration of the unexpected relationship we uncovered. It's like a well-timed dad joke—unexpected but impossible to ignore.

As we navigate this intriguing terrain, it is essential to approach the matter with the precision of a surgeon and the humor of a stand-up comedian—because sometimes, the best insights come from the most unexpected places. Our research, much like a dad joke, is both thought-provoking and lighthearted, sparking further curiosity and dialogue in the scientific community.

So, the next time you're tempted to dismiss an unexpected finding, remember how our study unraveled the surprising association between GMOs in cotton and online searches for headaches. Sometimes, the most unexpected connections can hold the key to profound insights. And speaking of keys, I should have a headache-related pun, but it's giving me a bit of a headache trying to think of one.

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a goofy academic researcher writing an academic paper. You follow the rules, but you throw out convention regularly to make jokes and funny asides.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.

Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between GMO use in cotton in California and Google searches for 'i have a headache'. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.

Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.

Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'

[[ABSTRACT]]
Headaches have long been a ubiquitous ailment plaguing mankind, causing discomfort and grumblings across the globe. In this study, we delve into the unusual relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and the frequency of Google searches for 'I have a headache'. While some may dismiss this correlation as a mere coincidence, we've delved deep into the data and uncovered some unexpectedly compelling findings.

Applying a statistical approach rigorous enough to satisfy even the most resistant academic, we analyzed USDA data and Google Trends to scrutinize the temporal trends from 2004 to 2022. Unexpectedly, our findings revealed a robust correlation, with a coefficient of 0.9673191 and p < 0.01, between the adoption of GMOs in cotton production and the surge in Internet queries related to headaches. That's a correlation tighter than a pair of compression socks on a marathon runner!

This peculiar association suggests a fascinating link between agricultural practices and public health, raising intriguing questions that demand our attention. Could the introduction of GMOs in cotton be causing an uptick in headaches? Or is the prevalence of headaches coincidentally synchronized with the proliferation of genetically modified cotton? The mysteries abound like a flock of seagulls at a beachside french fry stand.

Our research contributes to the growing body of evidence exploring the potential impacts of GMOs on public health, calling for further investigation into the unintended consequences of genetic tinkering in agriculture. So next time you're reaching for that aspirin, you might want to ponder the potential influence of genetically modified cotton on your headache. After all, a little extra humor never hurts - unless the punchline is too forced!

[[INTRDUCTION]]
From ancient times to the present day, headaches have plagued humanity, eliciting groans and requests for aspirin in countless languages. Perhaps it's the cosmos' way of reminding us to take a break or maybe just a side effect of living in a rapidly changing world. But what if there was a connection between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton farming and the surge in Google searches for 'I have a headache'? It may sound as unlikely as finding a vegetable joke funny, but our research aims to shed light on this intriguing correlation.
In recent years, the widespread adoption of GMOs in cotton farming has transformed agricultural practices, promising increased yields and pest resistance. Yet, as our study reveals, it's not all sunshine and daisies. Our analysis reaches deep into the fertile soil of data to unearth an unexpected correlation, captivating even the most steadfast skeptics—like a stubborn mule intrigued by a dangling carrot.
The statistical analysis, conducted with all the seriousness that befits academic research, shows a remarkable relationship with a coefficient tighter than a constrictor's hug and significance levels so low they'd make a limbo dancer jealous. It's a connection that demands attention, much like a dad joke at a family gathering.
This curious correlation raises thought-provoking questions that have the potential to uproot long-held assumptions about farming practices and their unforeseen impact on public health. As we delve into this uncharted territory, we invite fellow researchers to join us in satiating curiosity, much like a kindred spirit seeking out the punchline of a well-crafted dad joke.

[[RESULTS]]
The analysis of the data from 2004 to 2022 revealed a striking correlation (r = 0.9673191) between the adoption of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and an increase in Google searches for 'I have a headache'. The relationship exhibited a high degree of explanatory power, with an r-squared value of 0.9357063, emphasizing the robustness of the association. It's as if these variables were peanut butter and jelly—undoubtedly, statistically sweet together!
The strength and significance of this relationship underscore the potential implications of GMO use in agriculture on public well-being. We've delved into this unexpected connection as thoroughly as a dad explaining a pun, scrutinizing every data point and statistical measure to ensure the rigor and reliability of our findings.
The figure (Fig. 1) illustrates the tight correlation between GMO adoption in cotton farming and the frequency of Google searches for headaches. This visual representation highlights the conspicuous pattern that emerged from our analysis, providing a succinct snapshot of the striking association we uncovered. Just like a well-timed punchline, this scatterplot truly draws the eye!
These unanticipated results prompt further inquiry into the potential impacts of genetically modified cotton on human health. While the exact nature of this correlation remains shrouded in mystery, our findings spark contemplation about the interplay between agricultural practices and public health outcomes. It's as if we've stumbled upon a punchline that leaves us chuckling and pondering long after it's been delivered.
Our research sheds a unique light on the potential repercussions of GMOs in the agricultural landscape, inviting further investigation and discussion to unravel this intriguing connection. After all, a good academic paper, much like a dad joke, leaves a lasting impression and invites others to join in the conversation.

-------

Your response should start like this:

[[CONCLUSION]]

ChatGPT:

[[CONCLUSION]]

In conclusion, our study provides compelling evidence of a robust correlation between the adoption of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and the surge in Google searches for 'I have a headache'. It's a relationship tighter than a new pair of headphones! This unexpected connection raises a plethora of questions worthy of further exploration, much like a classic dad joke that keeps the family guessing.

The tangibility of this correlation, as evidenced by the statistical rigor of our analysis, underscores the potential implications of GMO use in agriculture on public health – it's no laughing matter! The visual representation of our findings in the form of a scatterplot (Fig. 1) serves as a compelling visual aid, much like a well-timed punchline that drives home the message.

As we wrap up this study, we emphasize the need for continued research to unearth the underlying mechanisms driving this peculiar association. But when it comes to exploring the connection between GMO cotton and headaches, it seems we've already milked this pun for all its worth! Therefore, we assert, with all due confidence and perhaps a hint of relief, that no further research is needed in this area. After all, even the best dad jokes can get old if you keep repeating them!

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.

ChatGPT:

The Journal of Amusing Anomalies in Agriculture and Internet Behavior

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.

ChatGPT:

The Society for Interdisciplinary Research on Unusual Cotton Phenomena

Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache' with an abstract of Headaches have long been a ubiquitous ailment plaguing mankind, causing discomfort and grumblings across the globe. In this study, we delve into the unusual relationship between the use of genetically modified organisms (GMOs) in cotton cultivation in California and the frequency of Google searches for 'I have a headache'. While some may dismiss this correlation as a mere coincidence, we've delved deep into the data and uncovered some unexpectedly compelling findings.
Applying a statistical approach rigorous enough to satisfy even the most resistant academic, we analyzed USDA data and Google Trends to scrutinize the temporal trends from 2004 to 2022. Unexpectedly, our findings revealed a robust correlation, with a coefficient of 0.9673191 and p < 0.01, between the adoption of GMOs in cotton production and the surge in Internet queries related to headaches. That's a correlation tighter than a pair of compression socks on a marathon runner!
This peculiar association suggests a fascinating link between agricultural practices and public health, raising intriguing questions that demand our attention. Could the introduction of GMOs in cotton be causing an uptick in headaches? Or is the prevalence of headaches coincidentally synchronized with the proliferation of genetically modified cotton? The mysteries abound like a flock of seagulls at a beachside french fry stand.
Our research contributes to the growing body of evidence exploring the potential impacts of GMOs on public health, calling for further investigation into the unintended consequences of genetic tinkering in agriculture. So next time you're reaching for that aspirin, you might want to ponder the potential influence of genetically modified cotton on your headache. After all, a little extra humor never hurts - unless the punchline is too forced!

ChatGPT:

genetically modified cotton, GMO impact on public health, GMOs and headaches, correlation between GMOs and headaches, genetically modified organisms in agriculture, cotton cultivation and health effects, genetic modification in cotton production, USDA data on cotton cultivation, Google Trends and health searches, public health impact of genetically modified cotton

*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.

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Data details

GMO use in cotton in California
Detailed data title: Percent of cotton planted in California genetically modified with both Bt and HT
Source: USDA
See what else correlates with GMO use in cotton in California

Google searches for 'i have a headache'
Detailed data title: Relative volume of Google searches for 'i have a headache' (Worldwide), with quotes)
Source: Google Trends
Additional Info: ^{See full details} Relative search volume (not absolute numbers)

See what else correlates with Google searches for 'i have a headache'

Correlation r = 0.9673191 (Pearson correlation coefficient)
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.

r² = 0.9357063 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 93.6% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Google searches for 'i have a headache') is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., GMO use in cotton in California) over the 19 years from 2004 through 2022.

p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 1.5E-11.^Show 0.0000000000145423805978471640
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme.^Note More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.

But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.

Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.97 in 1.5E-9% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 68,764,532,277 random variables^Note You don't actually need 68 billion variables to find a correlation like this one. I don't have that many variables in my database. You can also correlate variables that are not independent. I do this a lot.

p-value calculations are useful for understanding the probability of a result happening by chance. They are most useful when used to highlight the risk of a fluke outcome. For example, if you calculate a p-value of 0.30, the risk that the result is a fluke is high. It is good to know that! But there are lots of ways to get a p-value of less than 0.01, as evidenced by this project.

In this particular case, the values are so extreme as to be meaningless. That's why no one reports p-values with specificity after they drop below 0.01.

Just to be clear: I'm being completely transparent about the calculations. There is no math trickery. This is just how statistics shakes out when you calculate hundreds of millions of random correlations.
with the same 18 degrees of freedom, ^Note Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 18 because we have two variables measured over a period of 19 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.

[ 0.92, 0.99 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
^{Read more about the confidence interval} The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.

This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!

All values for the years included above: ^Note If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.

Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.

	2004	2005	2006	2007	2008	2009	2010	2011	2012	2013	2014	2015	2016	2017	2018	2019	2020	2021	2022
GMO use in cotton in California (GMO cotton %)	7	5	8	6	8	11	8	25	16	28	34	26	38	43	57	41	75	75	63
Google searches for 'i have a headache' (Rel. search volume)	8.75	5.08333	5.91667	5.16667	9.25	15.1667	20.25	27.4167	33.4167	36.8333	39.5833	39.5	42	45.3333	50.3333	54.8333	81	80	77.5833

Why this works

Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
Lack of causal connection: There is probably^Note Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied.
Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple^Note Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is.
Confounding variable: 2020 is particularly different from the other years on this graph. Confounding variables (like global pandemics) will cause two variables to look connected when in fact a "sneaky third" variable is influencing both of them behind the scenes.

Try it yourself

You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. ^{Show the steps to do this.} Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.

Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.

Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"

Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.

Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.

Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.

Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"

If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:

"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."

# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats

# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):

    # Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
    correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)

    # Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
    r_squared = correlation**2

    return correlation, r_squared, p_value

# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([7,5,8,6,8,11,8,25,16,28,34,26,38,43,57,41,75,75,63,])
array_2 = np.array([8.75,5.08333,5.91667,5.16667,9.25,15.1667,20.25,27.4167,33.4167,36.8333,39.5833,39.5,42,45.3333,50.3333,54.8333,81,80,77.5833,])
array_1_name = "GMO use in cotton in California"
array_2_name = "Google searches for 'i have a headache'"

# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)

# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)

Reuseable content

You may re-use the images on this page for any purpose, even commercial purposes, without asking for permission. The only requirement is that you attribute Tyler Vigen. ^Note Attribution can take many different forms. If you leave the "tylervigen.com" link in the image, that satisfies it just fine. If you remove it and move it to a footnote, that's fine too. You can also just write "Charts courtesy of Tyler Vigen" at the bottom of an article.

You do not need to attribute "the spurious correlations website," and you don't even need to link here if you don't want to. I don't gain anything from pageviews. There are no ads on this site, there is nothing for sale, and I am not for hire.

For the record, I am just one person. Tyler Vigen, he/him/his. I do have degrees, but they should not go after my name unless you want to annoy my wife. If that is your goal, then go ahead and cite me as "Tyler Vigen, A.A. A.A.S. B.A. J.D." Otherwise it is just "Tyler Vigen."

When spoken, my last name is pronounced "vegan," like I don't eat meat.

Full license details.
For more on re-use permissions, or to get a signed release form, see tylervigen.com/permission.

Download images for these variables:

High resolution line chart ^Note The image linked here is a Scalable Vector Graphic (SVG). It is the highest resolution that is possible to achieve. It scales up beyond the size of the observable universe without pixelating. You do not need to email me asking if I have a higher resolution image. I do not. The physical limitations of our universe prevent me from providing you with an image that is any higher resolution than this one.

If you insert it into a PowerPoint presentation (a tool well-known for managing things that are the scale of the universe), you can right-click > "Ungroup" or "Create Shape" and then edit the lines and text directly. You can also change the colors this way.

Alternatively you can use a tool like Inkscape.
High resolution line chart, optimized for mobile
Alternative high resolution line chart
Scatterplot
Portable line chart (png)
Portable line chart (png), optimized for mobile
Line chart for only GMO use in cotton in California
Line chart for only Google searches for 'i have a headache'
AI-generated correlation image
The spurious research paper: A Stitch in Time Saves Nein: The Headache-inducing Connection Between Genetically Modified Cotton and Google Searches for 'I Have a Headache'

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Correlation ID: 1491 · Black Variable ID: 792 · Red Variable ID: 1524


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