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AI explanation
As Neptune gets closer, its energy affects the gravitational pull on Earth. This creates a ripple effect, leading to a decrease in the alignment of criminal behavior in the District of Columbia. It's like the planet is sending out its own cosmic crime-fighting signal, keeping those Neptune-inspired burglaries at bay. Remember, a safe district is just one celestial dance away!
Model: dalle-3
Prompt: Generate an image of a TIME magazine cover featuring a bustling street in the District of Columbia on a quiet, serene night. The scene depicts people strolling leisurely along the sidewalks under the soft glow of streetlights. There is a noticeable calmness in the air as if a gentle force is soothing the atmosphere. The buildings and houses appear safe and undisturbed, exuding a sense of tranquility. It's as though a serene aura has settled over the city, calming potential mischievous intentions and lending a peaceful air to the surroundings. The depiction should include only scenes, people, and objects, it should not include text or speech bubbles.
This image generation prompt was also generated by AI, using the following sequence:
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You select one of a few potential scene descriptors that seems to go along with the situation described. You respond only with the scene descriptions provided and say nothing else.
User prompt: Here is a situation: Because as Neptune gets closer, it exerts a calming gravitational pull on people's behavior, reducing the urge to commit burglaries in the District of Columbia. It's like a celestial Zen master keeping would-be thieves in a peaceful state of mind.. Given that situation, which of the following image descriptions seems most appropriate? Pick the one that seems to be related to one of the variables at hand and the tone of the explanation. Please respond with only one of the following potential descriptions: Steampunk Whimsical illustration Symbolism Photorealism A TIME magazine cover image
ChatGPT: A TIME magazine cover image
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You describe simple visual scenes that depict the two variables stated and the explanation described. Do not reference graphs or charts; describe physical objects.
User prompt: Please describe a visual scene that depicts the following situation. Keep the description simple. Because as Neptune gets closer, it exerts a calming gravitational pull on people's behavior, reducing the urge to commit burglaries in the District of Columbia. It's like a celestial Zen master keeping would-be thieves in a peaceful state of mind.
ChatGPT: Imagine a bustling street in the District of Columbia on a quiet, serene night. People are strolling leisurely along the sidewalks under the soft glow of streetlights. There is a noticeable calmness in the air as if a gentle force is soothing the atmosphere. The buildings and houses appear safe and undisturbed, exuding a sense of tranquility. It's as though a serene aura has settled over the city, calming potential mischievous intentions and lending a peaceful air to the surroundings.
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You write and improve image generation prompts for DALLE-3. You maintain the same subjects, but enhance the visuals.
User prompt: Please respond with an image generation prompt that would be likely to create an interesting visual using DALLE-3, using the following style: [ A TIME magazine cover image ] and depicting this scene: Imagine a bustling street in the District of Columbia on a quiet, serene night. People are strolling leisurely along the sidewalks under the soft glow of streetlights. There is a noticeable calmness in the air as if a gentle force is soothing the atmosphere. The buildings and houses appear safe and undisturbed, exuding a sense of tranquility. It's as though a serene aura has settled over the city, calming potential mischievous intentions and lending a peaceful air to the surroundings. Keep the visual depiction simple. Do not include any words or speech bubbles.
ChatGPT: Generate an image of a TIME magazine cover featuring a bustling street in the District of Columbia on a quiet, serene night. The scene depicts people strolling leisurely along the sidewalks under the soft glow of streetlights. There is a noticeable calmness in the air as if a gentle force is soothing the atmosphere. The buildings and houses appear safe and undisturbed, exuding a sense of tranquility. It's as though a serene aura has settled over the city, calming potential mischievous intentions and lending a peaceful air to the surroundings.
*Variations in the User Prompts from chart to chart are just the result of random number generation in Python. I wrote a few arrays of various styles and methods to ask questions to change up the results. Every time this site writes an explanation or generates an image, the script picks from each at random.
I sequence the requests into multiple prompts because I find GPT 3.5 to perform much better with short, well-managed contexts. Thus, I track the context directly in Python and only ask ChatGPT targeted questions.
System prompt: You provide humorous responses in the form of plausible sounding explanations for correlations. You assume the correlation is causative for the purpose of the explanation even if it is ridiculous. You do not chat with the user, you only reply with the causal connection explanation and nothing else.
User prompt: Please make up a funny explanation for how a decrease in The distance between Neptune and Earth caused Burglaries in District of Columbia to decrease. Make it feel plausible.
AI academic paper
 |
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia The Journal of Intergalactic Socioastronomy Jan 2024 Reminder: This paper is AI-generated. Not real! |
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You write titles and abstracts of goofy academic research papers.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, and add unexpected twists in your writing.
Please draft the title and abstract of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Neptune and Earth and Burglaries in District of Columbia. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.
Make the title an alliteration.
Your research team used data from Caclculated using Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services to assess this nagging question. You found a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for 1985 to 2022.
Please respond in this format (replace "Lorem ipsum dolor sit" with your title and abstract)
[[TITLE]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit
[[ABSTRACT]]
Lorem ipsum dolor sit
ChatGPT:
[[TITLE]]
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
[[ABSTRACT]]
This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the introduction section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.
Please make up the introduction section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Neptune and Earth and Burglaries in District of Columbia. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.
Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
[[ABSTRACT]]
This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
-------
Your response should start like this:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
ChatGPT:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
"Out of this world" correlations and unexpected associations have long fascinated researchers across various fields, and indeed, the seemingly unconnected intertwining of celestial bodies and earthly events never fails to spark curiosity. In the realm of astro-criminology, our study delves into the celestial ballet between Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. Yes, you read that correctly – we're boldly going where no research has gone before, amidst the stars and crime statistics!
As we navigate the astronomical abyss of our solar system, our innate inquisitiveness as academics led us to this peculiar junction of celestial mechanics and criminal activity. Could it be that Neptune's distant sway has a ripple effect on criminal inclinations here on Earth? It's quite a "Neptoon" notion, isn't it?
The findings of our study reveal a surprising correlation between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the occurrences of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This connection, much like a cosmic conjuring, hints at a peculiar interplay between the cosmic and criminal – an unlikely and unexpected waltz of celestial influence on earthly transgressions. One can't help but wonder if Neptune is in cahoots with some mischievous mastermind, pulling the strings of celestial larceny from its distant domain.
While our results may seem like the plot of a science fiction thriller, they raise thought-provoking questions about the celestial forces at play in our daily lives. Perhaps there's more to the universe than meets the eye, and as we untangle the astrological fingerprints on earthly escapades, we are confronted with the incomprehensible magnitude of the cosmos. It's like trying to crack a planetary safe with astronomical tumblers – a head-spinning, yet exciting academic endeavor!
As the curtains rise on our cosmic symphony, we invite fellow researchers to join us in exploring the enigmatic intersections between the celestial and the criminal. After all, who knows what other cosmic escapades await our academic sleuthing? The universe is full of surprises, and if we're lucky, it may even throw in a few celestial dad jokes along the way!
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft a literature review section of an academic research paper, that starts out dry for the first few sentences but then becomes hilarious and goofy.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.
Please make up a literature review section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Neptune and Earth and Burglaries in District of Columbia. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences.
Speak in the present tense for this section (the authors find...), as is common in academic research paper literature reviews. Name the sources in a format similar to this: In "Book," the authors find lorem and ipsum.
Make up the lorem and ipsum part, but make it sound related to the topic at hand.
Start by naming serious-sounding studies by authors like Smith, Doe, and Jones - but then quickly devolve. Name some real non-fiction books that would be related to the topic. Then name some real fiction books that sound like they could be related. Then devolve ever further, and mention something completely ridiculous, like you conducted literature review by reading CVS receipts.
Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
[[ABSTRACT]]
This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
-------
And here is the introduction section that led to this literature review:
[[INTRODUCTION]]
"Out of this world" correlations and unexpected associations have long fascinated researchers across various fields, and indeed, the seemingly unconnected intertwining of celestial bodies and earthly events never fails to spark curiosity. In the realm of astro-criminology, our study delves into the celestial ballet between Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. Yes, you read that correctly – we're boldly going where no research has gone before, amidst the stars and crime statistics!
As we navigate the astronomical abyss of our solar system, our innate inquisitiveness as academics led us to this peculiar junction of celestial mechanics and criminal activity. Could it be that Neptune's distant sway has a ripple effect on criminal inclinations here on Earth? It's quite a "Neptoon" notion, isn't it?
The findings of our study reveal a surprising correlation between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the occurrences of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This connection, much like a cosmic conjuring, hints at a peculiar interplay between the cosmic and criminal – an unlikely and unexpected waltz of celestial influence on earthly transgressions. One can't help but wonder if Neptune is in cahoots with some mischievous mastermind, pulling the strings of celestial larceny from its distant domain.
While our results may seem like the plot of a science fiction thriller, they raise thought-provoking questions about the celestial forces at play in our daily lives. Perhaps there's more to the universe than meets the eye, and as we untangle the astrological fingerprints on earthly escapades, we are confronted with the incomprehensible magnitude of the cosmos. It's like trying to crack a planetary safe with astronomical tumblers – a head-spinning, yet exciting academic endeavor!
As the curtains rise on our cosmic symphony, we invite fellow researchers to join us in exploring the enigmatic intersections between the celestial and the criminal. After all, who knows what other cosmic escapades await our academic sleuthing? The universe is full of surprises, and if we're lucky, it may even throw in a few celestial dad jokes along the way!
-------
Your response should start like this:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
ChatGPT:
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
Several studies have investigated astronomical influences on various aspects of life, from agriculture to human behavior. In "Astro-Insights: Exploring Cosmic Connections" by Smith, the authors find intriguing correlations between planetary alignments and agricultural yields. Similarly, Doe and Jones in "Celestial Signatures: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Universe" delve into the potential impact of lunar phases on human mood and behavior. However, the literature is noticeably silent on the connection between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and criminal activities in urban areas.
Now, let's "orbit" over to the books that have explored the intersection of celestial bodies and earthly affairs. "Cosmic Coincidences" by Michael D. Lemonick provides a comprehensive overview of surprising connections between astronomical phenomena and everyday occurrences. In a more fictional realm, "The Martian" by Andy Weir humorously explores the challenges of survival on Mars, offering a "stellar" perspective on the extraterrestrial environment. On a lighter note, "So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish" by Douglas Adams playfully delves into the absurdities of intergalactic travel, reminding us that sometimes the universe's mysteries are best enjoyed with a healthy dose of humor.
Beyond the traditional literature sources, an unconventional approach was taken to further explore the subject, including a close examination of grocery store receipts, traffic signs, and even deciphering cryptic messages from fortune cookies. While these unconventional methods may raise eyebrows, they have proven to be surprisingly illuminating, unveiling previously unseen connections that might have otherwise remained hidden in the cosmic ether.
As we journey through this cosmic carousel of literature, it's evident that exploring the intersection of celestial mechanics and human activities is not only intriguing but ripe for a few "out-of-this-world" puns. After all, there's nothing like a celestial-themed dad joke to keep the academic spirits high – the universe is simply too vast to take too seriously!
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the methodology section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.
Please make up the methodology section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Neptune and Earth and Burglaries in District of Columbia. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.
Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Caclculated using Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services . You used data from 1985 to 2022
Make up the research methods you don't know. Make them a bit goofy and convoluted.
Here is the title, abstract, and introduction of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
[[ABSTRACT]]
This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
[[INTRODUCTION]]
"Out of this world" correlations and unexpected associations have long fascinated researchers across various fields, and indeed, the seemingly unconnected intertwining of celestial bodies and earthly events never fails to spark curiosity. In the realm of astro-criminology, our study delves into the celestial ballet between Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. Yes, you read that correctly – we're boldly going where no research has gone before, amidst the stars and crime statistics!
As we navigate the astronomical abyss of our solar system, our innate inquisitiveness as academics led us to this peculiar junction of celestial mechanics and criminal activity. Could it be that Neptune's distant sway has a ripple effect on criminal inclinations here on Earth? It's quite a "Neptoon" notion, isn't it?
The findings of our study reveal a surprising correlation between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the occurrences of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This connection, much like a cosmic conjuring, hints at a peculiar interplay between the cosmic and criminal – an unlikely and unexpected waltz of celestial influence on earthly transgressions. One can't help but wonder if Neptune is in cahoots with some mischievous mastermind, pulling the strings of celestial larceny from its distant domain.
While our results may seem like the plot of a science fiction thriller, they raise thought-provoking questions about the celestial forces at play in our daily lives. Perhaps there's more to the universe than meets the eye, and as we untangle the astrological fingerprints on earthly escapades, we are confronted with the incomprehensible magnitude of the cosmos. It's like trying to crack a planetary safe with astronomical tumblers – a head-spinning, yet exciting academic endeavor!
As the curtains rise on our cosmic symphony, we invite fellow researchers to join us in exploring the enigmatic intersections between the celestial and the criminal. After all, who knows what other cosmic escapades await our academic sleuthing? The universe is full of surprises, and if we're lucky, it may even throw in a few celestial dad jokes along the way!
-------
Your response should start like this:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
ChatGPT:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
To embark on this celestial and criminal odyssey, our research team employed an integrative approach that spanned the realms of astronomy and criminology. First and foremost, we harnessed the power of data analysis, turning to the trusty Astropy package to wrangle and analyze astronomical data with astronomical precision. Much like Neptune's orbit, this process required meticulous attention to detail and a keen eye for cosmic quirks – a real star-studded endeavor!
Simultaneously, we delved into the earthly domain of criminal justice data, tapping into the FBI Criminal Justice Information Services database to gather comprehensive statistics on burglaries in the District of Columbia from 1985 to 2022. This endeavor resembled the kind of detective work one might find in a crime thriller, except instead of chasing suspects, we were chasing space-time correlations. Perhaps we should have adopted a catchy alias like "The AstroSleuths," but alas, the academic world rarely indulges in such dramatic flair.
After meticulously gathering and organizing the data, we turned to statistical modeling to elucidate the potential relationship between the celestial dance of Neptune and the earthly occurrences of burglaries. We employed time series analysis and regression modeling to untangle the web of cosmic influence on criminal behavior, akin to untangling a celestial knot of events and distances.
Moreover, to ensure the robustness of our findings, we factored in a range of control variables, including socio-economic indicators, seasonal fluctuations, and other external factors that could sway the burglary statistics. This part of the process called for the agility of a nimble astronaut navigating through asteroid fields – dodging confounding variables instead of space debris. It's not every day you get to don a metaphorical space suit in a research setting, but when the cosmos is involved, a touch of interstellar flair is simply unavoidable.
Once the data was corralled, the statistical models were deployed, and the control variables were duly accounted for, we arrived at the celestial-crossed results that have captivated the academic community and raised eyebrows – much like a celestial eclipse meeting an earthly escapade. The correlation coefficients and p-values confirmed an unexpected nexus between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia, leaving us with a cosmic conundrum that defies conventional logic.
As we reflect on our research journey, we recognize the complexity of unraveling celestial enigmas and earthly phenomena. Our methodology, much like a cosmic expedition, required a delicate balance of precision, perseverance, and a subtle touch of stargazing whimsy. If our findings have sparked a renewed interest in the intersection of the celestial and the criminal, we consider our cosmic escapade a resounding success – an academic "Neptoon" adventure of astronomical proportions!
Can't resist a good cosmic pun – it's simply out of this world!
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the results section of an academic research paper. You speak in the past tense (you found...).
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.
Please make up the results section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Neptune and Earth and Burglaries in District of Columbia. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.
Your research team collected data from all across the internet, but mostly just used information from Caclculated using Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services .
For the time period 1985 to 2022, you found a correlation 0.9458413, r-squared of 0.8946158, and p < 0.01.
One figure will be included. The figure (Fig. 1) is a scatterplot showing the strong correlation between the two variables. You don't need to specify where; I will add the figure.
Here is the title and abstract of the paper:
[[TITLE]]
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
[[ABSTRACT]]
This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
-------
And here is the methodology section that led to this result:
[[METHODOLOGY]]
"Out of this world" correlations and unexpected associations have long fascinated researchers across various fields, and indeed, the seemingly unconnected intertwining of celestial bodies and earthly events never fails to spark curiosity. In the realm of astro-criminology, our study delves into the celestial ballet between Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. Yes, you read that correctly – we're boldly going where no research has gone before, amidst the stars and crime statistics!
As we navigate the astronomical abyss of our solar system, our innate inquisitiveness as academics led us to this peculiar junction of celestial mechanics and criminal activity. Could it be that Neptune's distant sway has a ripple effect on criminal inclinations here on Earth? It's quite a "Neptoon" notion, isn't it?
The findings of our study reveal a surprising correlation between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the occurrences of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This connection, much like a cosmic conjuring, hints at a peculiar interplay between the cosmic and criminal – an unlikely and unexpected waltz of celestial influence on earthly transgressions. One can't help but wonder if Neptune is in cahoots with some mischievous mastermind, pulling the strings of celestial larceny from its distant domain.
While our results may seem like the plot of a science fiction thriller, they raise thought-provoking questions about the celestial forces at play in our daily lives. Perhaps there's more to the universe than meets the eye, and as we untangle the astrological fingerprints on earthly escapades, we are confronted with the incomprehensible magnitude of the cosmos. It's like trying to crack a planetary safe with astronomical tumblers – a head-spinning, yet exciting academic endeavor!
As the curtains rise on our cosmic symphony, we invite fellow researchers to join us in exploring the enigmatic intersections between the celestial and the criminal. After all, who knows what other cosmic escapades await our academic sleuthing? The universe is full of surprises, and if we're lucky, it may even throw in a few celestial dad jokes along the way!
-------
Your response should start like this:
[[RESULTS]]
ChatGPT:
[[RESULTS]]
Upon analyzing the data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, we discovered a remarkably strong correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia from 1985 to 2022. This correlation suggested a substantial relationship between these seemingly unrelated phenomena, prompting us to ponder the cosmic consequences of Neptune's far-reaching influence on Earth.
Fig. 1 depicts the scatterplot demonstrating the robust correlation between the distance from Neptune and the occurrence of burglaries in the District of Columbia, highlighting the close alignment of these variables. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull is playing a mischievous game of celestial hide-and-seek with the criminological data, leaving us all starry-eyed with cosmic wonderment.
Our findings, while unexpected, shed light on the intricate interplay of cosmic phenomena and human behavior. Furthermore, the r-squared value of 0.8946158 reinforces the strength of this correlation, indicating that approximately 89.46% of the variability in burglary occurrences can be explained by the distance between Neptune and Earth. It's almost as if Neptune itself was in on the caper, orchestrating an astronomical symphony of mischievous activities in the District of Columbia.
The statistical significance of our results, with a p-value of less than 0.01, underscores the credibility of the observed correlation. It's as if Neptune whispered its secret criminal schemes to the winds of the cosmos, and our data embraced this intriguing cosmic confidant, complete with its own astrological mugshot.
In conclusion, our study unveils an unexpected nexus between celestial mechanics and criminal behavior, inviting an exploration of the celestial choreography orchestrating earthly events. As we delve deeper into the cosmic heist of Neptune's influence on burglaries, we're left contemplating the interstellar implications of such findings—a celestial enigma that leaves us questioning the extent of the universe's influence on our daily lives. It's as if the cosmos decided to spice up the criminological scene with a dash of planetary pandemonium!
Our results challenge conventional notions of causality and invite further inquiry into the often-overlooked impact of celestial phenomena on terrestrial affairs. As we unravel the celestial web of influence on criminal activity, we find ourselves at the crossroads of captivating cosmic curiosities and criminological conundrums. One thing's for sure – when it comes to celestial insight, there's always room for a good ol' dad joke or two, even in academe!
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the discussion section of an academic research paper.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.
Please make up the discussion section of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Neptune and Earth and Burglaries in District of Columbia. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.
Limit your response to 500 tokens.
Here are the title, abstract, literature review, and results sections. Please harken back to 1-2 of the goofy items in the literature review, but pretend to take them completely seriously. Discuss how your results supported the prior research.
Do not write a conclusion. I will add a conclusion after this.
[[TITLE]]
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
[[ABSTRACT]]
This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
[[LITERATURE REVIEW]]
Several studies have investigated astronomical influences on various aspects of life, from agriculture to human behavior. In "Astro-Insights: Exploring Cosmic Connections" by Smith, the authors find intriguing correlations between planetary alignments and agricultural yields. Similarly, Doe and Jones in "Celestial Signatures: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Universe" delve into the potential impact of lunar phases on human mood and behavior. However, the literature is noticeably silent on the connection between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and criminal activities in urban areas.
Now, let's "orbit" over to the books that have explored the intersection of celestial bodies and earthly affairs. "Cosmic Coincidences" by Michael D. Lemonick provides a comprehensive overview of surprising connections between astronomical phenomena and everyday occurrences. In a more fictional realm, "The Martian" by Andy Weir humorously explores the challenges of survival on Mars, offering a "stellar" perspective on the extraterrestrial environment. On a lighter note, "So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish" by Douglas Adams playfully delves into the absurdities of intergalactic travel, reminding us that sometimes the universe's mysteries are best enjoyed with a healthy dose of humor.
Beyond the traditional literature sources, an unconventional approach was taken to further explore the subject, including a close examination of grocery store receipts, traffic signs, and even deciphering cryptic messages from fortune cookies. While these unconventional methods may raise eyebrows, they have proven to be surprisingly illuminating, unveiling previously unseen connections that might have otherwise remained hidden in the cosmic ether.
As we journey through this cosmic carousel of literature, it's evident that exploring the intersection of celestial mechanics and human activities is not only intriguing but ripe for a few "out-of-this-world" puns. After all, there's nothing like a celestial-themed dad joke to keep the academic spirits high – the universe is simply too vast to take too seriously!
[[RESULTS]]
Upon analyzing the data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, we discovered a remarkably strong correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia from 1985 to 2022. This correlation suggested a substantial relationship between these seemingly unrelated phenomena, prompting us to ponder the cosmic consequences of Neptune's far-reaching influence on Earth.
Fig. 1 depicts the scatterplot demonstrating the robust correlation between the distance from Neptune and the occurrence of burglaries in the District of Columbia, highlighting the close alignment of these variables. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull is playing a mischievous game of celestial hide-and-seek with the criminological data, leaving us all starry-eyed with cosmic wonderment.
Our findings, while unexpected, shed light on the intricate interplay of cosmic phenomena and human behavior. Furthermore, the r-squared value of 0.8946158 reinforces the strength of this correlation, indicating that approximately 89.46% of the variability in burglary occurrences can be explained by the distance between Neptune and Earth. It's almost as if Neptune itself was in on the caper, orchestrating an astronomical symphony of mischievous activities in the District of Columbia.
The statistical significance of our results, with a p-value of less than 0.01, underscores the credibility of the observed correlation. It's as if Neptune whispered its secret criminal schemes to the winds of the cosmos, and our data embraced this intriguing cosmic confidant, complete with its own astrological mugshot.
In conclusion, our study unveils an unexpected nexus between celestial mechanics and criminal behavior, inviting an exploration of the celestial choreography orchestrating earthly events. As we delve deeper into the cosmic heist of Neptune's influence on burglaries, we're left contemplating the interstellar implications of such findings—a celestial enigma that leaves us questioning the extent of the universe's influence on our daily lives. It's as if the cosmos decided to spice up the criminological scene with a dash of planetary pandemonium!
Our results challenge conventional notions of causality and invite further inquiry into the often-overlooked impact of celestial phenomena on terrestrial affairs. As we unravel the celestial web of influence on criminal activity, we find ourselves at the crossroads of captivating cosmic curiosities and criminological conundrums. One thing's for sure – when it comes to celestial insight, there's always room for a good ol' dad joke or two, even in academe!
-------
Your response should start like this:
[[DISCUSSION]]
ChatGPT:
[[DISCUSSION]]
Our study has unveiled a cosmic correlation between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the occurrence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. While this connection may seem out of this world, our findings align with prior research that has hinted at the potential influence of celestial bodies on terrestrial activities. Much like a planet with an elliptical orbit, our results orbit around the previous studies on planetary alignments and human behavior – they just click into place!
The statistical significance of our data echoes the findings of Smith, who unraveled correlations between planetary alignments and agricultural yields. It seems that just as celestial bodies influence the growth of crops, they also play a hand – or should we say, a gravitational pull – in shaping criminal tendencies. It's as if Neptune's distant embrace reaches all the way to Earth, leaving its mark as a celestial crime boss! Well, I guess that makes Neptune the "godfather" of planetary mischief, huh?
Our results also echo the work of Doe and Jones, who delved into the potential impact of lunar phases on human mood and behavior. While our study focuses on a more distant celestial body, the idea that astronomical factors can sway human activities remains a captivating cosmic conundrum. It's as if the celestial dance of the planets is choreographing a grand symphony of earthly events, with Neptune leading the cosmic caper like a planetary pied piper.
As we navigate this celestial labyrinth of influences on human behavior, the unexpected correlations we've uncovered prompt a reevaluation of the extent to which cosmic phenomena may shape earthly occurrences. Perhaps the universe's silent influence on our daily lives isn't so silent after all. It's almost as if Neptune is sending us a celestial message in a bottle – or should we say, in an orbiting moon? Looks like our own celestial caper might just be getting started, and the universe has handed us the keys to an entire cosmic treasure trove of surprises!
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You are a researcher writing an academic paper.You draft the discussion section of goofy academic research papers that sounds like it belongs based on the title and abstract provided.
User prompt:
Pretend you are an academic researcher. Your writing sounds like it belongs in a medical or economics journal. However, you frequently crack jokes, make puns, or add unexpected twists in your writing.
Please make up a short conclusion of an academic research paper presenting the findings of the connection between The distance between Neptune and Earth and Burglaries in District of Columbia. You can't resist a good dad joke. Add a relevant dad joke related to the content every couple of sentences. Stay serious and dry most of the time, but then occasionally let your wit shine through.
Limit your response to 300 tokens. At the very end, assert that no more research is needed in this area.
Here are the title, abstract, introduction, and results sections.
[[TITLE]]
Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
[[ABSTRACT]]
This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
[[INTRDUCTION]]
"Out of this world" correlations and unexpected associations have long fascinated researchers across various fields, and indeed, the seemingly unconnected intertwining of celestial bodies and earthly events never fails to spark curiosity. In the realm of astro-criminology, our study delves into the celestial ballet between Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. Yes, you read that correctly – we're boldly going where no research has gone before, amidst the stars and crime statistics!
As we navigate the astronomical abyss of our solar system, our innate inquisitiveness as academics led us to this peculiar junction of celestial mechanics and criminal activity. Could it be that Neptune's distant sway has a ripple effect on criminal inclinations here on Earth? It's quite a "Neptoon" notion, isn't it?
The findings of our study reveal a surprising correlation between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the occurrences of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This connection, much like a cosmic conjuring, hints at a peculiar interplay between the cosmic and criminal – an unlikely and unexpected waltz of celestial influence on earthly transgressions. One can't help but wonder if Neptune is in cahoots with some mischievous mastermind, pulling the strings of celestial larceny from its distant domain.
While our results may seem like the plot of a science fiction thriller, they raise thought-provoking questions about the celestial forces at play in our daily lives. Perhaps there's more to the universe than meets the eye, and as we untangle the astrological fingerprints on earthly escapades, we are confronted with the incomprehensible magnitude of the cosmos. It's like trying to crack a planetary safe with astronomical tumblers – a head-spinning, yet exciting academic endeavor!
As the curtains rise on our cosmic symphony, we invite fellow researchers to join us in exploring the enigmatic intersections between the celestial and the criminal. After all, who knows what other cosmic escapades await our academic sleuthing? The universe is full of surprises, and if we're lucky, it may even throw in a few celestial dad jokes along the way!
[[RESULTS]]
Upon analyzing the data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, we discovered a remarkably strong correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia from 1985 to 2022. This correlation suggested a substantial relationship between these seemingly unrelated phenomena, prompting us to ponder the cosmic consequences of Neptune's far-reaching influence on Earth.
Fig. 1 depicts the scatterplot demonstrating the robust correlation between the distance from Neptune and the occurrence of burglaries in the District of Columbia, highlighting the close alignment of these variables. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull is playing a mischievous game of celestial hide-and-seek with the criminological data, leaving us all starry-eyed with cosmic wonderment.
Our findings, while unexpected, shed light on the intricate interplay of cosmic phenomena and human behavior. Furthermore, the r-squared value of 0.8946158 reinforces the strength of this correlation, indicating that approximately 89.46% of the variability in burglary occurrences can be explained by the distance between Neptune and Earth. It's almost as if Neptune itself was in on the caper, orchestrating an astronomical symphony of mischievous activities in the District of Columbia.
The statistical significance of our results, with a p-value of less than 0.01, underscores the credibility of the observed correlation. It's as if Neptune whispered its secret criminal schemes to the winds of the cosmos, and our data embraced this intriguing cosmic confidant, complete with its own astrological mugshot.
In conclusion, our study unveils an unexpected nexus between celestial mechanics and criminal behavior, inviting an exploration of the celestial choreography orchestrating earthly events. As we delve deeper into the cosmic heist of Neptune's influence on burglaries, we're left contemplating the interstellar implications of such findings—a celestial enigma that leaves us questioning the extent of the universe's influence on our daily lives. It's as if the cosmos decided to spice up the criminological scene with a dash of planetary pandemonium!
Our results challenge conventional notions of causality and invite further inquiry into the often-overlooked impact of celestial phenomena on terrestrial affairs. As we unravel the celestial web of influence on criminal activity, we find ourselves at the crossroads of captivating cosmic curiosities and criminological conundrums. One thing's for sure – when it comes to celestial insight, there's always room for a good ol' dad joke or two, even in academe!
-------
Your response should start like this:
[[CONCLUSION]]
ChatGPT:
[[CONCLUSION]]
In conclusion, our study has unveiled a surprising celestial twist in the realm of criminology. The significant correlation between the distance separating Neptune and Earth and the occurrences of burglaries in the District of Columbia has left us pondering the cosmic implications of planetary positioning on earthly wrongdoing. It's as if Neptune has been monitoring our earthly escapades from its celestial vantage point, quite the nosy neighbor, or should I say "Neptoon" neighbor?
As we venture into the uncharted territory of astro-criminology, we are compelled to acknowledge the astronomical merriment that permeates our findings. It's like the universe decided to pull off the grandest heist of them all—our expectation of mundane correlations shattered by the celestial caper unfolding before our eyes.
But fear not, fellow academics, as we assert that no further research in this area is needed. We've cracked the cosmic safe of celestial influence on criminal behavior, and it looks like Neptune might just have to answer some cosmic questions about its questionable celestial conduct!
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of academic journals. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding research, scientific, or academic journal that would publish a paper entited Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia. Respond only with the name of a fictional academic journal.
ChatGPT:
The Journal of Intergalactic Socioastronomy
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide fictional names of nonprofit research organizations and associations. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide the name of a funny but plausible sounding nonprofit, academic, or scientific association or organization that would sponsor research that resulted in a paper entited Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia. Respond only with the name of a fictional organization.
ChatGPT:
The Association for Planetary Policy and Criminal Behavior Research
Model: gpt-3.5-turbo-1106
System prompt: You provide potential search keywords separated by commas. You say nothing else, and you do not chat with the user.
User prompt: Please provide potential search keywords for a paper titled Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia with an abstract of This groundbreaking study navigates the uncharted waters of astro-criminology by scrutinizing the unique connection between the distance between Neptune and Earth and burglaries in the District of Columbia. Leveraging data obtained from Astropy and FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, our research team embarked on a cosmic quest to explore the possible influence of astronomical factors on earthly criminal behavior. To our astonishment, we unraveled a correlation coefficient of 0.9458413 and p < 0.01 for the time span from 1985 to 2022.
In our analysis, we discovered that as the celestial distance between Neptune and Earth fluctuated, so did the incidence of burglaries in the District of Columbia. This correlation, while unexpected, conjures a sense of cosmic irony, as if the planetary dance in the far reaches of our solar system was orchestrating a celestial symphony of mischief on our very doorstep. It's as if Neptune's gravitational pull was moonlighting as a cosmic cat burglar – quite the stellar heist, if you ask us!
Our findings not only shed light on the celestial choreography shaping earthly events but also prompt a reevaluation of astronomical influences on human behavior. As we strive to unearth the underlying mechanisms behind this unexpected correlation, we invite fellow researchers to join us in this celestial caper and unlock more cosmic secrets—after all, there's always room for more "spacey" puns in the world of academe!
ChatGPT:
Neptune, Earth, orbital spacing, offense spree, District of Columbia, astro-criminology, burglaries, Astropy, FBI Criminal Justice Information Services, correlation coefficient, celestial distance, solar system, gravitational pull, human behavior, astronomical influences, cosmic secrets
*There is a bunch of Python happening behind the scenes to turn this prompt sequence into a PDF.
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Data details
The distance between Neptune and EarthDetailed data title: The average distance between Neptune and Earth as measured on the first day of each month
Source: Caclculated using Astropy
Additional Info: I wrote a Python script using Astropy to calculate the distance between the named planets on the first day of each month for every year.
See what else correlates with The distance between Neptune and Earth
Burglaries in District of Columbia
Detailed data title: The burglary rate per 100,000 residents in District of Columbia
Source: FBI Criminal Justice Information Services
See what else correlates with Burglaries in District of Columbia
Correlation is a measure of how much the variables move together. If it is 0.99, when one goes up the other goes up. If it is 0.02, the connection is very weak or non-existent. If it is -0.99, then when one goes up the other goes down. If it is 1.00, you probably messed up your correlation function.
r2 = 0.8946158 (Coefficient of determination)
This means 89.5% of the change in the one variable (i.e., Burglaries in District of Columbia) is predictable based on the change in the other (i.e., The distance between Neptune and Earth) over the 38 years from 1985 through 2022.
p < 0.01, which is statistically significant(Null hypothesis significance test)
The p-value is 3.6E-19. 0.0000000000000000003577493493
The p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme. More specifically the p-value is a measure of how probable it is that we would randomly find a result this extreme if we had only tested one pair of variables one time.
But I am a p-villain. I absolutely did not test only one pair of variables one time. I correlated hundreds of millions of pairs of variables. I threw boatloads of data into an industrial-sized blender to find this correlation.
Who is going to stop me? p-value reporting doesn't require me to report how many calculations I had to go through in order to find a low p-value!
On average, you will find a correaltion as strong as 0.95 in 3.6E-17% of random cases. Said differently, if you correlated 2,795,253,162,463,264,256 random variables You don't actually need 2 quintillion variables to find a correlation like this one. I don't have that many variables in my database. You can also correlate variables that are not independent. I do this a lot.
p-value calculations are useful for understanding the probability of a result happening by chance. They are most useful when used to highlight the risk of a fluke outcome. For example, if you calculate a p-value of 0.30, the risk that the result is a fluke is high. It is good to know that! But there are lots of ways to get a p-value of less than 0.01, as evidenced by this project.
In this particular case, the values are so extreme as to be meaningless. That's why no one reports p-values with specificity after they drop below 0.01.
Just to be clear: I'm being completely transparent about the calculations. There is no math trickery. This is just how statistics shakes out when you calculate hundreds of millions of random correlations.
with the same 37 degrees of freedom, Degrees of freedom is a measure of how many free components we are testing. In this case it is 37 because we have two variables measured over a period of 38 years. It's just the number of years minus ( the number of variables minus one ), which in this case simplifies to the number of years minus one.
you would randomly expect to find a correlation as strong as this one.
[ 0.9, 0.97 ] 95% correlation confidence interval (using the Fisher z-transformation)
The confidence interval is an estimate the range of the value of the correlation coefficient, using the correlation itself as an input. The values are meant to be the low and high end of the correlation coefficient with 95% confidence.
This one is a bit more complciated than the other calculations, but I include it because many people have been pushing for confidence intervals instead of p-value calculations (for example: NEJM. However, if you are dredging data, you can reliably find yourself in the 5%. That's my goal!
All values for the years included above: If I were being very sneaky, I could trim years from the beginning or end of the datasets to increase the correlation on some pairs of variables. I don't do that because there are already plenty of correlations in my database without monkeying with the years.
Still, sometimes one of the variables has more years of data available than the other. This page only shows the overlapping years. To see all the years, click on "See what else correlates with..." link above.
| 1985 | 1986 | 1987 | 1988 | 1989 | 1990 | 1991 | 1992 | 1993 | 1994 | 1995 | 1996 | 1997 | 1998 | 1999 | 2000 | 2001 | 2002 | 2003 | 2004 | 2005 | 2006 | 2007 | 2008 | 2009 | 2010 | 2011 | 2012 | 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021 | 2022 | |
| The distance between Neptune and Earth (Planetary distance (AU)) | 30.2333 | 30.2245 | 30.2148 | 30.2058 | 30.1956 | 30.1871 | 30.1795 | 30.1729 | 30.166 | 30.1594 | 30.1521 | 30.1437 | 30.1342 | 30.1234 | 30.1118 | 30.0994 | 30.0881 | 30.0772 | 30.0674 | 30.0579 | 30.0512 | 30.0443 | 30.0374 | 30.0289 | 30.0219 | 30.0128 | 30.0028 | 29.9907 | 29.9817 | 29.9718 | 29.9628 | 29.9532 | 29.9488 | 29.9434 | 29.9387 | 29.9317 | 29.9286 | 29.9224 |
| Burglaries in District of Columbia (Burglary rate) | 1598.2 | 1727.6 | 1807.7 | 1983.9 | 1950.3 | 1983 | 2074.4 | 1820.2 | 1995.5 | 1760.9 | 1838.4 | 1809.9 | 1316.3 | 1216.3 | 976.3 | 829.5 | 862.5 | 908.4 | 837.7 | 712 | 614.6 | 659.5 | 667.4 | 640 | 616.4 | 699.8 | 622 | 555.5 | 510.9 | 525.3 | 443.2 | 345 | 260 | 254.9 | 260.2 | 275.5 | 273.8 | 201.2 |
Why this works
- Data dredging: I have 25,153 variables in my database. I compare all these variables against each other to find ones that randomly match up. That's 632,673,409 correlation calculations! This is called “data dredging.” Instead of starting with a hypothesis and testing it, I instead abused the data to see what correlations shake out. It’s a dangerous way to go about analysis, because any sufficiently large dataset will yield strong correlations completely at random.
- Lack of causal connection: There is probably
Because these pages are automatically generated, it's possible that the two variables you are viewing are in fact causually related. I take steps to prevent the obvious ones from showing on the site (I don't let data about the weather in one city correlate with the weather in a neighboring city, for example), but sometimes they still pop up. If they are related, cool! You found a loophole.
no direct connection between these variables, despite what the AI says above. This is exacerbated by the fact that I used "Years" as the base variable. Lots of things happen in a year that are not related to each other! Most studies would use something like "one person" in stead of "one year" to be the "thing" studied. - Observations not independent: For many variables, sequential years are not independent of each other. If a population of people is continuously doing something every day, there is no reason to think they would suddenly change how they are doing that thing on January 1. A simple
Personally I don't find any p-value calculation to be 'simple,' but you know what I mean.
p-value calculation does not take this into account, so mathematically it appears less probable than it really is. - Y-axis doesn't start at zero: I truncated the Y-axes of the graph above. I also used a line graph, which makes the visual connection stand out more than it deserves.
Nothing against line graphs. They are great at telling a story when you have linear data! But visually it is deceptive because the only data is at the points on the graph, not the lines on the graph. In between each point, the data could have been doing anything. Like going for a random walk by itself!
Mathematically what I showed is true, but it is intentionally misleading. Below is the same chart but with both Y-axes starting at zero.
Try it yourself
You can calculate the values on this page on your own! Try running the Python code to see the calculation results. Step 1: Download and install Python on your computer.Step 2: Open a plaintext editor like Notepad and paste the code below into it.
Step 3: Save the file as "calculate_correlation.py" in a place you will remember, like your desktop. Copy the file location to your clipboard. On Windows, you can right-click the file and click "Properties," and then copy what comes after "Location:" As an example, on my computer the location is "C:\Users\tyler\Desktop"
Step 4: Open a command line window. For example, by pressing start and typing "cmd" and them pressing enter.
Step 5: Install the required modules by typing "pip install numpy", then pressing enter, then typing "pip install scipy", then pressing enter.
Step 6: Navigate to the location where you saved the Python file by using the "cd" command. For example, I would type "cd C:\Users\tyler\Desktop" and push enter.
Step 7: Run the Python script by typing "python calculate_correlation.py"
If you run into any issues, I suggest asking ChatGPT to walk you through installing Python and running the code below on your system. Try this question:
"Walk me through installing Python on my computer to run a script that uses scipy and numpy. Go step-by-step and ask me to confirm before moving on. Start by asking me questions about my operating system so that you know how to proceed. Assume I want the simplest installation with the latest version of Python and that I do not currently have any of the necessary elements installed. Remember to only give me one step per response and confirm I have done it before proceeding."
# These modules make it easier to perform the calculation
import numpy as np
from scipy import stats
# We'll define a function that we can call to return the correlation calculations
def calculate_correlation(array1, array2):
# Calculate Pearson correlation coefficient and p-value
correlation, p_value = stats.pearsonr(array1, array2)
# Calculate R-squared as the square of the correlation coefficient
r_squared = correlation**2
return correlation, r_squared, p_value
# These are the arrays for the variables shown on this page, but you can modify them to be any two sets of numbers
array_1 = np.array([30.2333,30.2245,30.2148,30.2058,30.1956,30.1871,30.1795,30.1729,30.166,30.1594,30.1521,30.1437,30.1342,30.1234,30.1118,30.0994,30.0881,30.0772,30.0674,30.0579,30.0512,30.0443,30.0374,30.0289,30.0219,30.0128,30.0028,29.9907,29.9817,29.9718,29.9628,29.9532,29.9488,29.9434,29.9387,29.9317,29.9286,29.9224,])
array_2 = np.array([1598.2,1727.6,1807.7,1983.9,1950.3,1983,2074.4,1820.2,1995.5,1760.9,1838.4,1809.9,1316.3,1216.3,976.3,829.5,862.5,908.4,837.7,712,614.6,659.5,667.4,640,616.4,699.8,622,555.5,510.9,525.3,443.2,345,260,254.9,260.2,275.5,273.8,201.2,])
array_1_name = "The distance between Neptune and Earth"
array_2_name = "Burglaries in District of Columbia"
# Perform the calculation
print(f"Calculating the correlation between {array_1_name} and {array_2_name}...")
correlation, r_squared, p_value = calculate_correlation(array_1, array_2)
# Print the results
print("Correlation Coefficient:", correlation)
print("R-squared:", r_squared)
print("P-value:", p_value)Reuseable content
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Download images for these variables:
- High resolution line chart
The image linked here is a Scalable Vector Graphic (SVG). It is the highest resolution that is possible to achieve. It scales up beyond the size of the observable universe without pixelating. You do not need to email me asking if I have a higher resolution image. I do not. The physical limitations of our universe prevent me from providing you with an image that is any higher resolution than this one.
If you insert it into a PowerPoint presentation (a tool well-known for managing things that are the scale of the universe), you can right-click > "Ungroup" or "Create Shape" and then edit the lines and text directly. You can also change the colors this way.
Alternatively you can use a tool like Inkscape. - High resolution line chart, optimized for mobile
- Alternative high resolution line chart
- Scatterplot
- Portable line chart (png)
- Portable line chart (png), optimized for mobile
- Line chart for only The distance between Neptune and Earth
- Line chart for only Burglaries in District of Columbia
- The spurious research paper: Neptune's Nautical Neighbors: Navigating the Nexus Between Orbital Spacing and Offense Spree in the District of Columbia
Your rating skills are legendary!
Correlation ID: 1313 · Black Variable ID: 1941 · Red Variable ID: 20135
